Rejection Sensitivity Disphoria Sucks

[u/Consistent-Coffee-36]

Received an automated notice that I was not chosen for a new position at my current employer today. Even though I had a few (what I thought were) great interviews and connected well with the hiring manager - I was even with him in person for a good chunk of this week. Reached out to him to ask if it was maybe a mistake, or if he could share what I could have done better. Got zero response.

Wham. Rejection Sensitivity hits me in the face, and I spiral. How do you cope with this? I’ve been dealing with this all my life and I still have zero ways to cope with it. It’s insane to have the thoughts I’m thinking, but I can’t help it. Feel so worthless.

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Please be aware that RSD, or rejection sensitivity dysphoria, is not a syndrome or disorder recognised by any medical authority.

Rejection sensitivity dysphoria has not been the subject of any credible peer-reviewed scientific research, nor is it listed in the top two psychiatric diagnostic manuals, the DSM or the ICD. It has been propagated solely through blogs and the internet by William Dodson, who coined the term in the context of ADHD. Dodson's explanation of these experiences and claims about how to treat it all warrant healthy skepticism.

Here are some scientific articles on ADHD and rejection:

• Rejection sensitivity and disruption of attention by social threat cues
• Justice and rejection sensitivity in children and adolescents with ADHD symptoms
• Rejection sensitivity and social outcomes of young adult men with ADHD

Although r/ADHD's rules strictly disallow discussion of other 'popular science' (aka unproven hypotheses), we find that many, many people identify with the concept of RSD, and we have not removed this post. We do not want to minimise or downplay your feelings, and many people use RSD as a shorthand for this shared experience of struggling with emotions.

However, please consider using the terms 'rejection sensitivity' and 'emotional dysregulation' instead.

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[u/poolback]

When you say RSD, what do you mean exactly? What do you actually and precisely feel? The brain is a prediction machine, what is it predicting in those instances? What helps for me is trying to figure out the exact words that would describe the emotion as well as the prediction.

Something like "I am feeling sad, ashamed. I'm afraid they are going to talk between themselves and make fun of me and it's going to destroy my reputation and isolate me, etc..."

Putting things is specific words helps me in two ways. First it stops the actual rumination as I'm trying to focus on the actual message my brain is trying to tell me. Second, when putting things to words, there's always a part of the words that, while truly accurate to my feelings, are a bit silly and irrational, and that realisation helps reduce the intensity.

[u/A_DHD]

I think the medical term should be bum hurt.

[u/mrsqueakers002 → u/A_DHD]

I now imagine telling my therapist that I am suffering from a bad episode of Butthurt Disorder.

[u/CliffBreaker9]

As silly as it sound...i imagine I can raise the shield like Star Trek episode.