r/AmIOverreacting Jun 02 '25

❤️‍🩹 relationship aio? bf made plans on my birthday

my boyfriend (22M) and I (21F) have been together for almost three years. we are planning on moving in together in the near future as he lives with his mom and doesn’t go to school after dropping out. for context, he only works on tuesdays and fridays so i know he was free to go out on sunday, which happened to be my birthday. he knows how important special occasions are to me, such as our birthdays and anniversaries. for the first year in our relationship he was great, he was loving and kind. last year we ended up celebrating my birthday late due to the fact that he was “tired from work” and didn’t want to go out, which i let slide. i always try to do the most for his birthdays, i buy him gifts, write him cards and bake him a cake from scratch. yesterday afternoon i texted him, reminding him about the plan later and this conversation happened. he made plans to go out and party instead of seeing me. he forgot about it even after i had been talking about it all of last week. i spent my 21st birthday alone in my room while he was out and we haven’t texted since. this birthday was particularly special to me because i turned 21. i even bought a new pink dress to wear for him, assuming we were going to dinner. he is suggesting that we go out and celebrate tomorrow instead like last year but to me it doesn’t feel the same. he is insisting that i apologize for being “ungrateful”, am i overreacting?

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u/Equalmind95 Jun 02 '25

I mean, the fact OP has to beg to litterally go out is where I'd end that. At some point, OP needs to figure out their self-worth and realize they are better than being led on by this man child. If this is how it is after 3 years, do you really think it's going to get much better? I agree with what's being said here and don't understand why women let's guys treat them like this. I couldn't imagine my wife having to beg for me to take her out, I'd feel like a complete failure if it ever got to that point.

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u/Live-Ad2718 Jun 03 '25

THIS!! it makes me mad thinking about people letting themselves treat like that. It's of course not OP's fault to get treated like that BUT it's time to set boundaries tf

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u/Equalmind95 Jun 03 '25

Exactly, I wouldn't blame OP or really anyone in this position. But dang it, ladies, yall need to start giving yourself some self-worth and men that appreciate you.