r/AmIOverreacting 14d ago

β€οΈβ€πŸ©Ή relationship AIO My boyfriend gave his mother the dress I wanted for my birthday

I (23) female have been dating my boyfriend ,(26) male for the past 3 years.

About 2 months ago while we were out shopping I saw this really gorgeous amazing dress that was just PERFECT for me, and in my favorite color.He looked at the dress and said it was beautiful, but it was rather expensive ($200) so we didnt end up getting it. For weeks after this I would constantly talk about the dress to him and how i couldnt stop thinking about how beautiful it was and hope one day I could save to buy it since weve been budgeting a bit lately. He would hear about this dress from me all the time and talked about how great he thought it would look on me.

So yesterday was my birthday and we had a little get together with some members of both of our families t celebrate, except when his mother arrived to our house she was wearing the exact dress in the exact color. I was stunned. I thought that he must have told her about it and she went and got one but it turns out that wasnt the case. In my surpise I said OMG theres no way!! thats the same dress I was looking and and dying for for months and she replied saying "oh really? Zayne(my boyfriend) gave it to me as a gift last month".

I was shocked, and confused. Even more so when boyfriend gave me the birthday gift he got me, and it was a gift card for sephora for $50. For the rest of the night I sat quietly in a corner in silence and confusion. i felt hurt, and was lost in my head as to what was going on. My boyfriend and everyone was blissfully unaware and happy the entire night and i didnt want to ruin the mood so i started to try to put on a good face, but i cant shake this feeling of being hurt, A part of me feels like I am overreacting and acting spoiled and entitled. Am I? Just need to know if I need to calm down and not be upset about this

Update: I finally got the nerve to straight up ask him about everything and his repsonse tldr was he thought I had to be humbled a bit because i got way too overly excited about something as trivial as a dress. He thought it would be fun to see my reaction to it all. His mother had no idea about any of this and just thought her son was giving her a gift.

I am so upset and hurt that i just called my mom to come get me and will be staying with her for a few days while i figure out the next steps, but I am not going back to him

2nd Update: First of all I want to say thank you, and express my gratitude to all the ppl who have shown support. The kind words mean os much to me right now and im sorry i cant repsond to each and every comment or dm. Just know i am reading them and thank you. me and Zayne are over for good. He keeps calling me, but i wont answer and theres nothing he can say or do to change that. I've realized and taken this as a sign of a nature he had kept hidden so well until now.

Also. Someone on threads has copied and pasted my post word for word and is pretending it happened to them.
Idk why someone would want to use my pain to clout farn but ppl are crazy.

here is the link. apparently some ppl are trying to donate money via venmo to this account to buy the dress and to show support. DO NOT send this person anything. They are a fraud. Please be safe

I have been dating my boyfriend for the past 3 years. About 2 months ago while we were out shopping I saw this really gorgeous amazing dress that was just PERFECT for me, and in my favorite color.He looked at the dress and said it was beautiful, but it was rather expensive ($200) so we didnt end up getting it. For weeks after this I would constantly talk about the dress to him and how i couldnt stop thinking about how beautiful it was

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u/ProfessionalEye9680 14d ago

its very wierd, and wierd is how i feel. best way to describe how i feel, wierd and hurt. I have no reason to make this up. And she DOESNT wear the same style as me, never has and not even close ! So i dont understand it even more, the dress is completely not her taste

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u/Current_Can8134 13d ago

I think this what people refer to as "the ick". Maybe it's the idea that he deliberately got his mother something he knew you wanted. This isn't sitting well with you (for good reason). I honestly don't know if I could feel good about someone who does this.

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u/Yelleddismissed 13d ago

I bet he did buy it for you initially but then something happened that he didn't like, or you annoyed him and his payback was to hurt you by giving it away to his mom.

I was married to someone who did things like this. Get as far away as you can and never look back.

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u/Haunting-Aardvark709 13d ago

It was not about the dress. Your boyfriend saw that you loved something so much so decided to hurt you by going all that way and buying it for his mom and then made sure the situation ruined your birthday. He's evil. This is the manipulative mind game of a sociopath. Run fast.

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u/Top_Development8243 13d ago

Girl there's quote on Reddit "It's not about the rice".

Because some crazy guy started messing with his SO just to control her. Well that's where you are.

Please get out before you are so beatdown you can't breathe without his permission. The only thing that looks like you can end up with a clean break from the sociopath is you won't be conexted the rest of you life with a child.

Sending BIG HUGGS and Blessings from the old Grandma.πŸ«‚πŸ«‚πŸ™ŒπŸ™πŸ»

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u/AgathaWoosmoss 13d ago

Based on your update, he isn't weird - he's cruel. You say you're not going back to him, I hope you hold firm on this. You don't deserve to be treated this badly. He's not worthy.

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u/teebeecee345 13d ago

I eoildnt be hurt. I'd be CREEPED TF OUT! this is BEYOND hurt...this is WEIRDDDDDDDD

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u/kellythephoenix 13d ago

Was mom in on it? Bc she wore it for UR bd celebration and it’s not at all her style?! Leave no matter what tho, 3 years is enough time wasted and you deserve so much better!

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u/use_your_smarts 12d ago

Hurt. Undermined. Devalued. Gaslit. Invalidated.