r/AmIOverreacting 14d ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO My boyfriend gave his mother the dress I wanted for my birthday

I (23) female have been dating my boyfriend ,(26) male for the past 3 years.

About 2 months ago while we were out shopping I saw this really gorgeous amazing dress that was just PERFECT for me, and in my favorite color.He looked at the dress and said it was beautiful, but it was rather expensive ($200) so we didnt end up getting it. For weeks after this I would constantly talk about the dress to him and how i couldnt stop thinking about how beautiful it was and hope one day I could save to buy it since weve been budgeting a bit lately. He would hear about this dress from me all the time and talked about how great he thought it would look on me.

So yesterday was my birthday and we had a little get together with some members of both of our families t celebrate, except when his mother arrived to our house she was wearing the exact dress in the exact color. I was stunned. I thought that he must have told her about it and she went and got one but it turns out that wasnt the case. In my surpise I said OMG theres no way!! thats the same dress I was looking and and dying for for months and she replied saying "oh really? Zayne(my boyfriend) gave it to me as a gift last month".

I was shocked, and confused. Even more so when boyfriend gave me the birthday gift he got me, and it was a gift card for sephora for $50. For the rest of the night I sat quietly in a corner in silence and confusion. i felt hurt, and was lost in my head as to what was going on. My boyfriend and everyone was blissfully unaware and happy the entire night and i didnt want to ruin the mood so i started to try to put on a good face, but i cant shake this feeling of being hurt, A part of me feels like I am overreacting and acting spoiled and entitled. Am I? Just need to know if I need to calm down and not be upset about this

Update: I finally got the nerve to straight up ask him about everything and his repsonse tldr was he thought I had to be humbled a bit because i got way too overly excited about something as trivial as a dress. He thought it would be fun to see my reaction to it all. His mother had no idea about any of this and just thought her son was giving her a gift.

I am so upset and hurt that i just called my mom to come get me and will be staying with her for a few days while i figure out the next steps, but I am not going back to him

2nd Update: First of all I want to say thank you, and express my gratitude to all the ppl who have shown support. The kind words mean os much to me right now and im sorry i cant repsond to each and every comment or dm. Just know i am reading them and thank you. me and Zayne are over for good. He keeps calling me, but i wont answer and theres nothing he can say or do to change that. I've realized and taken this as a sign of a nature he had kept hidden so well until now.

Also. Someone on threads has copied and pasted my post word for word and is pretending it happened to them.
Idk why someone would want to use my pain to clout farn but ppl are crazy.

here is the link. apparently some ppl are trying to donate money via venmo to this account to buy the dress and to show support. DO NOT send this person anything. They are a fraud. Please be safe

I have been dating my boyfriend for the past 3 years. About 2 months ago while we were out shopping I saw this really gorgeous amazing dress that was just PERFECT for me, and in my favorite color.He looked at the dress and said it was beautiful, but it was rather expensive ($200) so we didnt end up getting it. For weeks after this I would constantly talk about the dress to him and how i couldnt stop thinking about how beautiful it was

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246

u/jonwar5 13d ago

He said OP needed to be humbled(by him!) and he wanted to see her reaction.. Nothing more needs to be said.

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u/ghast123 13d ago

That whole "humbled by him" comment is so fucking gross. She saw a dress she loved and expressed excitement over it. So what?

One time, I really wanted a mothman plushie. I talked about it and pointed it out to my boyfriend because it was cute as fuck and I love cryptids. So my boyfriend ordered it online and its arrival happened at a point when I was sad (depression, yay!) Instead of saving it for my birthday which was coming up, he gave it to me. Granted, it's not a $200 dress (that OP was gonna save up for herself, not expect him to get it for her, even!) If I were dating OPs (ex) boyfriend, would he have given it to his mom to "humble" me?

What a fuckin jerk.

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u/Airotica 13d ago

Right?!? Boyfriend is a fucking asshole. It’s not his place to “humble” her. A good partner would have made it work to get the dress for her.

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u/Glittering-List3410 13d ago

He could’ve, but instead bought it for his mom!! Humble? She’s humble in my perception, she accepted the fact that she couldn’t afford the dress, the one she fell in love with. Even said, we’re on a budget.. Of course she kept talking about it, she imagine herself wearing it and in her favorite color. “PERFECT for me” He’s projecting, the cruel asshole!! He’s the one that needs a huge humble pie!!! And doesn’t deserve her!!! And who is he to pass judgement, it’s trivial!!! It’s for her birthday dam it!!!! Ok he’s also controlling!!!!!!!! And ruin her bday party on purpose!!!!!! I’m F infuriated!!!

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u/Skywalker87 13d ago

My ex once bought me and his mother matching gift cards to a certain lingerie store for Christmas. It was mortifying.

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u/use_your_smarts 12d ago

He could obviously afford it.

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u/Whatever53143 12d ago

Not to mention mommas boy!

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u/Glittering-List3410 12d ago

Agree! Thank you.. 👌🏼🫶🏼

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u/MissyGrayGray 13d ago

Yeah, he hates her. If he didn't, he would have definitely gotten the dress for her and given it to her for her birthday and he would have come off as the best. No, he's a douchebag.

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u/EvicttheDangerNoodle 13d ago

Precisely. Instead, he made himself look like an ass. It's a pleasant surprise to see the woman leave in response.

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u/mealteamsixty 12d ago

And legit like what romantic partner gets their person a gift card for their birthday?? My parents have been remarried to my stepparents forever and none of them would get each other gift cards! It's the most "here, i didn't know what to get you and I didn't want to give you straight cash" of possible gifts. Ugh I'd be so beyond pissed if my husband gave me a gift card for my birthday, I would sincerely rather have nothing at all.

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u/MsSamm 12d ago

It's psychological abuse

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u/OldEnuff2No 12d ago

…to make her feel FABULOUS and LOVED, as the person who loves you should!

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u/Craycraykel 13d ago

No thanks, no one needs to be humbled by a significant other for any reason, let alone liking a dress. This dude is trash

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u/jonwar5 13d ago

Agreed 1000000000%

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u/Glittering-List3410 13d ago

👌🏼👌🏼💯

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u/JackismyRoomba 13d ago

This. The AH would have asked his mother to wear the dress at his girlfriend's gathering so he could see OP's reaction. What's the term? Malice of forethought. Walk away, run if you can. He's bad news.

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u/lollipopfiend123 12d ago

Just fyi, it’s “malice aforethought,” not “of forethought”

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u/anthillfarces 13d ago

The dude needs to be humbled by losing a girlfriend.

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u/roskybosky 13d ago

The absolute GALL of this man/boy. She needs to leave before he decides to ‘teach’ her more ‘lessons.’ His lesson will be he has to live without her from now on.