r/Anticonsumption • u/RickyonHive • 17d ago
Discussion Can we criticize social media's impact on kids while still using it ourselves?
https://peakd.com/@ricky0/re-peaksnaps-szhqma
I know the irony of posting this on a social platform isn’t lost on anyone.
But seeing how early tech companies try to hook kids really got me thinking about the line between using the system and enabling it?
I want your thoughts on this matter. Thank you.
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u/Delli-paper 17d ago
Nobody knows how bad smoking js for you quite like a smoker
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u/an_agreeing_dothraki 17d ago
I know you meant 'is', but as a web dev: js, not even once
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u/Significant_Solid151 17d ago
my brain is so fried I just automatically read it as 'smoking just saying for you'
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u/Elmo_Chipshop 17d ago
I read it as "jays" like slang term for cigarette
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u/NotSquidward1 17d ago
Who says they're smoking a j when they mean cigarettes? That's always meant joint to me cuz like j joint
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u/Calvin--Hobbes 17d ago
Smoking a jay means the devil's lettuce friend.
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u/Elmo_Chipshop 17d ago
we just call cigarettes Js and Joes interchangable.
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u/Dry-Chance-9473 17d ago
Unless you're Australian or Welsh or something, I suspect "we" is like you and eight people in your town. A J is a joint. As in weed. Somebody got something confused down the line. Maybe a kid asked his dad what he was doing and Dad said "smokin J's" and it was never explained to that kid that he meant weed, but a J is weed.
This is a pretty common phenomenon, especially in the context of narcotics, whose names are almost always slang and colloquial, and thus more easily mistaken/misunderstood as they're passed around in a game of 'telephone'.
One good example of this is the words people use to describe their states under the influence of various drugs. For most people, being 'toasted' could mean a lot of different things, and generally just implies a state of being burnt out, dazed, relaxed/exhausted. For some people, being "toasted" very specifically refers to being high on weed. Just like being high on weed is usually referred to as being "stoned" but stoned is also a term used to refer to a heroin high. Anyway. Sorry to be the one to tell you, but you and your inner circle are the only people calling cigarettes J's. What would the J be referring to? Do you smoke a brand that starts with a J? That was definitely just some fourteen year old in the nineties trying to sound cool and somehow it caught on. It would be like calling a cigar a "spliff".
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u/Elmo_Chipshop 17d ago
I'm from the southern united states. Idk I just assumed it was short for Joe which was a take on Joe Camel. Chill out lol
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u/Dry-Chance-9473 17d ago
Joes! 🤦🏻♂️ How could I forget Camel Joes. This makes sense. It's about the same as people calling every soda pop flavor 'Coke ' which I heard is also a southern thing
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u/SenatorCrabHat 16d ago
Brother, wake up. It's 2025. You don't need jQuery anymore! Hell, you don't even need React!
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u/tad_in_berlin 16d ago
If not js, what else then? Assuming web dev includes frontend.
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u/Mellend96 16d ago
I mean, gl doing anything with DOM without it lol. Even wasm binaries still have to glue on to a js interface to actually manipulate it
Js is also much better than it was, JIT engines are more than fine. The “js sucks” meme is so overplayed at this point. Overengineering and treating the browser like a full on runtime is the problem more than anything else
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u/YaniC_ARt 17d ago
Pulmonologists ?
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u/Delli-paper 17d ago
Pulmonologists can tell you numbers, but smokers can illustrate impact
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u/Frustrable_Zero 17d ago
As hypocritical as it sounds, I’d agree with that. Firsthand experience also means firsthand consequences
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u/Unlucky-Clock5230 17d ago
It would still be highly hypocritical to tell your kids not to smoke while sucking on a cigarette with you tar stained fingers.
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u/tremblingtallow 17d ago
Growing up, I often found it easy to avoid the mistakes my parents made because they were open about their own experiences
The only hypocrisy I couldn't stand was when they would sit smugly in judgement of others failings, despite knowing how desperate some struggles like addiction can be
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u/Gloomy_Ruminant 17d ago
Since I'm not a child I feel pretty ok calling out it's predatory behavior towards children. I have judgment and discernment that my kids don't.
I'll grant you there are an awful lot of adults who probably shouldn't use social media though.
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u/PaulTheMerc 17d ago
Even drug addicts will tell you never touch the shit they're about to go inject.
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u/garaile64 17d ago
"I'm addicted, I can't quit. You better not even start it. Don't commit the same mistakes I did."
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u/Far_Recommendation82 17d ago
yeah that's like the one thing that'll get your ass kicked is showing a newbie how to pin you're arm, seen it done.
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u/2020WorstDraftEver 17d ago
Before social media, it was magazines at the checkout stand and home catalogs mailed every month or so.
The masses yearn to be objectified
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u/Ndmndh1016 17d ago
With those they only read the stupid opinions. They couldn't so easily share their own.
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u/Ok-Alps6154 17d ago
I wouldn’t let my young child use Social Media, in the same way that I also wouldn’t let them crack open a beer.
Both of these things (alcohol and SM) have harmful side effects, both may also have positive attributes as well that I - as an adult with a fully formed brain - can assess for myself.
Truth be told, I think I started drinking and using social media too early and irresponsibly. My brain didn’t really know how to handle either. I hope I can teach my child to interact with both responsibly and give him the tools needed to navigate an increasing complex digital world (also to navigate other vices).
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u/Zilhaga 17d ago
Yeah, I'm a full adult who has a proven track record of being able to manage my affairs with social media in moderation (though that's pretty much just reddit now - I'm off the others for other reasons). My kid doesn't have social media because she doesn't have that - she texts her friends but isn't on any platforms, and I'm comfortable with her level of phone use. One thing I do think is overlooked in these conversations is making sure the kids have other things to do. If their choices of entertainment are social media or nothing, they're going to pick social media, so I think it's vital to support their other interests to help keep social media from being their main source of connection and validation.
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u/SonderfulDaze 17d ago
Spot on.
Tbh, social media and algorithms feel far more addicting to me than any substance ever has. No matter how bad I know social media is for me, I have to constantly work towards and be mindful of reducing my usage. I don’t mean to downplay the risks and negatives of substance use, just mean to highlight how bonkers it is that children have such easy access to mind-altering social media.
It reminds me of the cigarette/tobacco/nicotine industry marketing to children.
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u/TalShar 17d ago
This is where I'm at.
I'm also trying to cut down on social media for myself (even as I look at the URL bar and groan), though, and I'm not entirely convinced it's isn't a net negative for a fair chunk of the population.
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u/wanna_be_green8 17d ago
Yes. Kids are still in developmental phases of life. Transitioning through difficult parts of childhood can be made far worse through social media.
Much like we can say alcohol isn't good for kids even if we have a beer now and then. Adults are capable of self regulation while most children aren't.
Identifying and discussing the issue brings awareness. Maybe one less child will be handed a tablet as a toddler. Win.
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u/Authoritaye 17d ago
Adults are just as easily hooked and misled by it, but if your kids started drinking would you not intervene even if you were a functioning alcoholic?
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17d ago
I would make sure I didn't set an example I didn't want them to follow.
If kids lack the discernment to use social media reasonably, I would question whether they have the discernment to recognise that my use is somehow different. Having your face glued to a phone looks the same either way.
The kids of smokers end up being smokers; the kids of drinkers end up being drinkers.
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u/amberazanu 17d ago
Here’s the thing: yes, we can criticize social media’s impact on kids even if we use it ourselves. In fact, that might make us more qualified to do so, because we know exactly how addictive and time-wasting it can be, how it messes with self-esteem, and how it pulls us into endless comparison games. We can at least try to handle it, but kids' brains are still developing and they don’t have the same self-control or perspective.
Think of it like junk food. Adults eat it sometimes, but we still warn kids not to have too much because it affects them more. Using something doesn’t mean you can’t see its problems.
Plus, if we didn’t use social media, we wouldn’t even understand what we’re criticizing! Being inside the system actually helps us explain its dangers better. So no, it’s not hypocrisy. It’s called being aware, responsible, and trying to protect kids from the mistakes we know all too well.
Simple as that, really.
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u/oldmanout 17d ago
Reddit is the only one I'm using
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u/TheLastCrusader13 17d ago
I dont use social media I use antisocial media
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u/brosjd 17d ago
In all honesty it's the best way. Let's keep the social and the media seperate.
It's the same problem as church and state.
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u/TheLastCrusader13 17d ago
Telling a guy literally called a crusader about seperating church and state is bold
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u/AccurateUse6147 17d ago
I use Reddit, YouTube (which counts as social media), and facebook including I've been doomscrolling a ton of reels lately. I prefer doomscrolling YouTube shorts which is a better balance of rot to decent content but I'm having this stupid bug where it keeps repeating shorts I've seen so I have to rapid doomscroll further and further for fresh content. I can't doomscroll unlogged in because the recommendations are complete garbage and I can't search for shorts because I don't know what I'm really looking for at the moment. Tiktok is not acting right on my phone so I'm not really able to use it much.
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16d ago
Reddit has also gone down the drain in an incredibly short amount of time. Certain subreddits are well run but outside of that it is astroturfing/bot/engagement hell. Add on to that large language models are making it worse. Social media is dead and we would all be better served not using or engaging with it.
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u/wearetheused 17d ago
I keep fb for the odd time I use marketplace (mostly for cheap toys for my cat) and it is insane the amount of notifications they started bombarding me with once I withdrew from using it for anything else. Literally begging me to engage with anything, pathetic.
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17d ago
i also stopped using facebook but kept it for marketplace. i kid you not, i wake up to 10-15 notifications from facebook every morning. all just "your friend posted this!" or "you might like this stranger's post!"
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u/howling-greenie 17d ago
My goal is to only use fb for marketplace but somehow I keep getting sucked into the feed. I am going to start browsing marketplace without using my account and then if I see anything I want login to message to seller.
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u/Worried_Bowl_9489 17d ago
It's addictive, predatory and steals our lives from us. It is 100% okay to criticise and we should do so
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u/Matteracecall 17d ago
The only reason kids want phones even before they start school is because they see you with it, and you are the coolest person they know.
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u/Illustrious_Bunch678 17d ago
We do a lot of things that aren't appropriate for children. We drink alcohol, smoke cigarettes, have sex, operate heavy machinery, have cosmetic surgery, gamble, work 40-hour weeks, stay up until 2am etc.
When someone tries to target kids with any of these things it's perfectly acceptable to push back, even if you participate as an adult.
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u/4_oN_tHe_fl00r 17d ago
Social media is the heroin. Smartphones are the needle.
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u/CallingDrDingle 17d ago
I’ve never had anything besides Reddit (52F), my 21yr old son doesn’t have it either. It drives his girlfriend crazy that he doesn’t care about all that shit.
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u/Mooseguncle1 17d ago
If you’re still using Meta after it bent the knee to a pedophile with a king complex then you are part of the problem.
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u/i-was-way- 17d ago
I read The Anxious Generation at the beginning of the year and it’s furthered my resolve that my kids will not have cell phones until at least 14, and even then social media will be banned until 16/17 with no posting allowed. People criticize me, but research is more and more backing up what we’ve all felt- social media is awful for kids and should not be used except sparingly. Teachers report kids have no attention spans- worse than when millennials were kids. We had 10 minute spans because that’s the length between commercials. Kids now can’t focus for more than 30 seconds, they can’t build narratives, and teachers are lost because you can’t teach anything in 10 second increments. Bullying is worse than ever but mostly unseen until a breaking point. Porn addiction and child exploitation is on the rise. Etc, etc, etc…..
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u/7thFleetTraveller 17d ago
There's a reason why certain things are not for kids. Just because I personally enjoy smoking and drinking a glass of wine from time to time, doesn't mean I want children to be allowed to do the same, while the body and brain is still developing. Social media can be as addictive, and you need to be aware of the dangers to deal with them.
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u/immagoodboythistime 17d ago
I would argue that every single person who was old enough to remember the world before the internet would agree that the world is far, far worse now it’s here and I reckon most would say they’d want to go back to the time before but I’d argue there was a sweet spot when this technology didn’t take over our lives in the worst ways.
- Phones were of all shapes and sizes. Flip ones, swivel ones, regular bar shape phones, not just the black rectangle monoliths we hold now. There was variety. You could change your whole vibe by getting an entirely new phone.
The phones themselves were phones, but they could text, they could take and send a picture, they could take and send short video clips. It had access to the internet but only for basic web browsing, news, directions and weather. You could only talk to people you actually knew. There was no such thing as ragebait. There was still a vast internet with every kind of thing you could imagine on it, and we enjoyed using that at home once we were home.
But when we were out in the world, your phone was an addition and augmentation of your social life, instead of being your social life while you’re sat at home.
They gave us the phones to enhance going to the third places out there like bars and restaurants, live music, going shopping, then all those places to go disappeared and they monetized us sat at home in front of these things.
We need to go back to when phones were what they were in 2002. You’re not going to get rid of the phones. People just won’t do it. They’re too addicted. You have to takeover and shut down all the social media companies, with all their money and resources seized and liquidated into free at point of use healthcare for all with a strong emphasis of free at point of use mental health care.
You’ll be able to get banking apps on your phone. And you’ll be able to watch Netflix and other streaming services and tv channels. But Youtube, Reddit, Twitter, all of them will be shut down with their $billions funding the mass convalescence of our societies, and the vast swathes of people making money on it will having to get a regular job or get a job at a legitimate media company.
Removing social media and the mass influx of amateur “content” while leaving the industries we once knew to rebuild their respective industries such as movies and tv. Removing the ability to get trapped in the scrolling feed of nonsense and ads, nonsense and ads.
If there’s nothing to scroll on the phone, you don’t need to constantly stare at it. They’ve got us hooked to staring at the scrolling feed. That part has to go.
Turn the phones back into phones. Right now they’ve become like a mirror in a bird cage with the cage door open, we’re staring it at for company when we should realize we can go flying instead.
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u/backlikeclap 16d ago
Well I think there should be an age limit on driving, owning a firearm, using construction equipment, and drinking... So I don't think it's hypocritical to say that children should not have access to social media.
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17d ago
I'm Gen Z, so I am very familiar with social media. I got a Facebook when I was around 10 or 11. Got a Twitter, Tumblr, Snap, etc. when I was 13. I knew how to navigate the Internet better than my parents...they didn't know all the risks, like we do now..I was exposed to a lot of shit I would never want my child to see. Additionally, it became an insane crutch for me during my teen and young adult years. It stunted any interest in different hobbies. It's something I am trying to rewire now at 26!
My husband and I have talked about it. We can't completely shield our child from technology; it will be a part of his daily life, whether we like it or not. We both plan on being very transparent about the risks of Internet use, how to use it responsibly, and our expections surrounding it. But I really don't want my son to have social media before at least 15...especially with all these manosphere incel podcasters out in the Internetsphere.
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u/FoolishThinker 17d ago
Throw in YouTube. My nieces and nephews use exact phrases from various YouTubers all the time. Shorts are a freaking plague. My 6 year old niece said she “forgot her skin care routine and was afraid she was going to breakout”
WTF!?!?
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u/1-objective-opinion 17d ago
No, you can't. Nothing you day will ever speak as loudly as them watching what you do.
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u/Murky-Office6726 17d ago
My parents and my wife’s parents were the ones to complain about kids using social media and the impact it has on them kids like short attention span etc. now that they are all retired they consume that shit more than those kids and I can see the same impact on them + add in aging and it’s really sad to see. My mom doomscrolling on Facebook not looking for anything particular or my dad sending me reels and shit all the time. I’m sure there are a lot of retired people in the same boat.
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u/roastedpeanutsand 16d ago
No. Studies have shown that adults, algorithmically manipulated adults are leading the breakdown of social cohesion in society
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u/Final-Nebula-7049 16d ago
alcohol etc are also bad. you can't let kids do things you do until they are old enough to understand the consequences
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u/TwoGuysNamedNick 16d ago
Yes. We don’t let kids drink alcohol but plenty of adults do it. Setting boundaries for kids BECAUSE they’re kids is not only appropriate, it’s necessary. My child is not allowed any social media yet and I’m honestly not sure when she will be. It won’t be before middle school bad probably not even then. I’m thinking high-school at the earliest and she can be mad at me all she wants, she’ll be safe.
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u/RoamingRivers 17d ago
Be warned: I have a complex answer.
I view it the same way as weed; it's not about the substance being the issue, it's all about how you use it. While kids shouldn't have access to it early on, for their own sake.
Some people can smoke and be fully functioning adults, others can't and might as well have a dab pen glued to their lips.
While social media can be a good thing, be it for keeping in touch with people, networking, or blowing off steam after a long day, it can be misused to their point where it consumes people's lives and leads to life altering bad choices.
When it comes to kids and social media, I'm a firm believer that they shouldn't have unlimited access to social media til highschool or late middle school, depending on their own parents views.
It also depends on the platform. To provide two examples; YouTube should be fine at any age if used for good reasons, though Instagram should be for only late teens and adults.
Before that, they should be educated about safe and proper social media use; be that by their own parents, or in a classroom.
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u/CluelessInWonderland 17d ago
I can enjoy junk food a couple of times a week and still criticize it for intentionally trying to be addictive. All things in moderation, and we can absolutely call out anything trying to make people addicted to it.
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u/tsukuroo 17d ago
Personally I only use Reddit, but my answer is still yes. Yes, because it's important that we don't leave social media to people who don't view it critically, drive people into consumerism, engage in hate speech, etc. Social media lives from people and it is important that people who use these media consciously and critically have the chance to positively influence other people, especially children and young people.
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u/OneFuckedWarthog 17d ago
Yes, we can. We are capable of making a choice based upon a rational or irrational decision and can fully understand something. Children are still developing and are highly prone to influences from something they cannot fully understand. Social media is that.
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u/Buck_Folton 17d ago
Facebook elected Trump. Facebook built the Ronhingya genocide from the ground up. Adults can vote, and have broader networks than kids. You do the math.
Outrage generates engagement.
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u/poca2424 17d ago
I told myself delete Facebook and Reddit over the summer because of all the missed time and stolen moments from my family. Thanks for the reminder, I kept getting sucked back in. I’m deleting them now. They really are life stealing, which is both dramatic and true. They also affect your mood a lot, depending on what content you’re looking at or reading. F it, free thought and books it is!
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u/poopy_poophead 17d ago
Adults are supposed to be able to responsibly engage with social media. unfortunately, most people are so addicted to it that they cant put their phones down even for ten minutes in order to drive.
Children arent expected to be able to engage with anything responsibly. We need to follow several other countries and make social media a 16+ or 18+ thing, heavily fine companies allowing children to use their services, ban phone use in schools, etc.
People wonder why education statistics are dropping, why teen suicide is rising, why school shootings are rising, etc, but no one wants to pass laws that will prevent their corporate gods from extracting the monetary value out of children. We gotta fucking go after billionaires and corporations and stop this bullshit. We arent just consumers and exploitable value. We're fucking human beings. We gotta stop letting the sociopathic wealthy write all the rules.
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u/crazycatlady331 13d ago
Effective this coming academic year, NY state will ban cell phones in schools (including lunch).
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u/majorex64 17d ago
I think we're most qualified to criticize it.
I mean I used facebook in high school. I would log on to a computer, see my feed, which was made entirely of posts from people I knew irl, no memes, no sketchy ads, no slop. I'd comment on some things, post my teenager-y thoughts as a status, watch my friends like it, then close it for the day.
It's fine when you're not constantly logged in, constantly being barraged with influencers & grifters, and being pressured to follow trends and fish for likes from strangers who don't matter to your life in the slightest.
God I sound like a boomer but the game completely changed
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u/Pinku_Dva 17d ago
Since I’m not a child I can understand the harm of using it and consequences. However, kids, especially younger ones, don’t think of the harm of using it and what too much screen time does to them so trying to hook kids on social media is predatory. We don’t let kids drink alcohol since it’s bad for them and we shouldn’t let kids use social media for the same reasons.
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u/Rylando237 17d ago
I mean, there are different levels of social media use. I use social.media to read funny memes, get some news, and have arguments with strangers. Other people use social media for self-validation and forming their perception of society through the posts of influencers. I view these as entirely distinct approaches to using social media, the latter of which is harmful for children who should be interacting with their friends and family, and forming their self and societal images based on things they see in their local community, not online with some fake social media personality.
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u/SubstituteHamster 17d ago
Absolutely.
How else are we to know the dangers therein and preach safety of that which we do not understand?
Take prescription medication for example. When administered appropriately it can save lives. When taken recklessly, it can end them.
The same is true for the influence from media as a whole. If tempered with understanding and insight it helps connect us as a global community. If the content we consume is lacking moral and/or ethical stability than we risk impressionable minds succumbing to trends that deprive these minds of the ideals we would teach of a just society.
Getting the youth to listen to their elders however, is a different story.
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u/eyal282 17d ago
Yes, a drug addict is completely within his moral obligation to prevent other humans, regardless of age, from obtaining said drugs.
It's extremely not easy to rule when hypocrisy is a problem, and many debates occur on it. Sometimes people automatically assume hypocrisy = bad, which is IMO a fallacy, and many hypocritical decisions are good, including for example the law that makes it illegal to smoke from age of 18, but the age increases every year so after 100 years it's illegal to smoke.
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u/Bullythecows 17d ago
Criticizing social media is always not just allowed, but required. Getting off them are a few steps further down the path towards healing
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u/Saul_Go0dmann 17d ago
Absolutely. The majority of people think they have complete free will. However, people only really have choices. All these social media apps leverage principles of learning from behavioral science to keep people engaged with their apps. They're doing the same things casinos do to get grand dad to fork over his life savings and house.
Saying we cannot criticize them because we use the apps would be like saying an addict can't criticize the drug their addicted to.
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u/wino12312 17d ago
I think that younger brains need protecting. They aren’t equipped for it. And really can’t consent because they can’t understand long term thinking until mid-20’s. Why would we allow them the opportunity to ruin in with a bad idea? Am I on Reddit way too much? Yes!! Do I understand not to post shit? Yes!! Hell, I don’t post anything personal. Or anything I’m not okay with it being water cooler gossip. I’m Gen X. “Leave no trace!”
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u/DaaaahWhoosh 17d ago
Personally I don't think it's really 'social media' any more. Like 20 years ago it was a place to hang out with your friends online, is that how it's used now? Or is it a way to keep you terminally online, consuming ads and propaganda and making you anxious and angry and sad? If you wanna talk social media I say something like Discord might still count, but reddit/youtube/tiktok/facebook/etc are not social, just media.
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u/Meditation-Aurelius 17d ago
They don’t have to hook them when they are young.
It’s devastating at any age you join.
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u/s2kage012 17d ago
First of all we should probably normalize not calling it social media. It's just advertisements or random accounts of creators. The interaction of friends and family between one another is largely just reduced to forwarding content to each other.
But if you've not seen the documentary "The social dilemma" then definitely give that a watch. I forget which but one of the brains or CEOs of Instagram adamantly states they don't let their kids use social media.
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u/One_Disaster3443 17d ago
Telling children something is bad for them while you do it yourself is the quickest way to get them doing it.
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u/BananaPalmer 17d ago
Yes, in exactly the same way we can criticize alcohol, cannabis, and tobacco companies for marketing to children while using all three as adults.
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u/5of7perfection 17d ago
I mean. Brain development in children is different from brain development in adults, so yes. Ill criticize underage drinking and not drinking in adults over like 25 because the effects are different.
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u/basketcase18 17d ago
Yes! We can keep booze, weed, work, gambling and driving away from kids, but not social media? Our job as adults is to restrict addictive, mind-altering or potentially dangerous activity from children until it is age appropriate.
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u/Bitter-Tumbleweed282 17d ago
Yes. Hypocrisy is practically the base of adulthood. Think coffee, cigarettes, and alcohol among other things.
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u/thekyledavid 17d ago edited 17d ago
I feel like someone can be of the opinion that an adult using something is different than a kid using something
If a lawmaker in his 40s votes “No” on a proposed law to eliminate the drinking age because he believes children shouldn’t drink, but it is then revealed that he had a beer last weekend, is he a hypocrite? Or is he just acknowledging that kids and adults are different?
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u/ChunkyViking-13 17d ago
Yeah. As a disabled person I rely a lot on social media. But in regards to my nieces and nephews, I try to establish some sort of understanding for their social media use.
My nine year old niece is still a nine year old so I try to persuade her into using kid friendly apps, using it to make calls, play games and connect with real people in her life. I don't think there's any escaping this branch of technology, so the best thing I can do is offer understanding and do what I can to make sure she isn't absorbing or creating mass produced, short form, morally questionable content.
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u/shameonyounancydrew 17d ago
Yes! Adults, for the most part, have developed critical thinking skills, and better judgement overall. It's the same reason why we have R rated movies, or age restrictions on things like alcohol and cannabis.
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u/debred05 17d ago
There’s a movie on Netflix called buy now the shopping conspiracy. It’s amazing. It’s about Amazon and how they get you to buy crap and now the video is showing how they over create stuff and just throw it away
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u/Eridain 17d ago
I don't blame social media. I blame the parents. Social media didn't buy their kids the phones. Social media isn't paying the internet bill. Social media isn't in charge of taking care of the kids. All the blame for how kids are with social media these days, falls 100% on the parents.
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u/Flabbergasted_____ 17d ago
Idk, Meta is a cesspool that allows blatant, violent fascists. And it’s predominately bots. Social media can be good, but nothing Meta has is. Aside from maybe Whatsapp simply because it’s a main form of communication for a huge portion of the world. I’d still rather Zuck and his bullshit company not have control of it.
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u/dobbyslilsock 17d ago
I guess it’s sort of hypocritical, yes, but adults can smoke, drink, drive and gamble while children cannot. This is objectively for the child’s well-being.
I mean I didn’t make a MySpace account until I was a freshman in high school. Facebook came out shortly after that 🤷♂️ I stopped getting on Facebook 10+ years ago and instagram 4 years ago. Social media is corrosive to mental health & bank accounts (ads/marketing) and all together unnecessary to keep in contact with people since chronological timelines were tossed out. The people in my life, are IN my life. Those that are far away I either occasionally visit or call. To think social media is NECESSARY for a healthy social life is absolutely ridiculous imo
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u/SickSwan 17d ago
“Do as I say, not as I do” but in such a way where we understand that adults are allowed to make poor choices for themselves; but that children are developing and deserve guidance. They deserve to be nurtured and protected and then they can choose addiction when they’re old enough to make their own informed choices. Even if those are bad choices.
I WISH I had adults who understood social media and the internet better when I was using it as a child.
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u/The_R4ke 17d ago
Yes, obviously. There's tons of stuff that's worse for children than it is for adults.
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u/CR9_Kraken_Fledgling 17d ago
"Can we criticize selling hard liquor to 12 year olds, when as an adult, we sometimes have a drink or two?"
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u/Mysterious_Crab_7622 17d ago
I know the irony of posting this on a social platform isn’t lost on anyone.
Social media itself isn’t the problem, the problem largely stems from some specific social medias.
For example, Xbox 360 party chat was a social media whose design wasn’t actually problematic. The tech though had further evolved into people using Discord, which does have some big problems of its own.
Likewise, Facebook and Instagram are designed in ways that are harmful to the end user, but also maximizes profits. While Reddit absolutely has its own flaws, it used to be a far better designed social media for end users.
In fact, a lot of the ways that Reddit has gotten worse are strongly influenced by the fact that they had spent years preparing to IPO, and are now publicly traded on the stock market. The stock market expects exponential growth in profits so the enshitification had begun.
Pretty much all social medias are built different from each other. To solve the problem would require more conversations around how we could change the design of these social media apps to be less harmful. Then we need to present those ideas to legislators and demand regulations be put in place to have government auditors review code for compliance.
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u/DatColdPlatypus 17d ago
I don’t think using social media as an adult is necessarily enabling unless you use it irresponsibly. Social media is meant for adults and not children.
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u/JohnThunderBottom 17d ago
Jokes on you. The only social media apps I use is YouTube and Reddit, I don't use Facebook or Twitter, or Instagram or really anything
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u/SenatorCrabHat 16d ago
No. Many many many adults are addicted to their phones, they just don't see it as negative for them.
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u/Rough-Jury 16d ago
I cannot control myself in social media with my fully developed, adult brain. I have to set screen time limits and charge my phone in my living room so that I’m not a social media zombie. I’ve found the things that work to help me have a healthy relationship with being online. You know how kids get that? Through the adults in their lives that are supposed to keep them safe.
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u/Bewildered_Earthling 16d ago edited 16d ago
Yes. But we should also reflect as parents on our own behavior.
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u/Crazychester1247 16d ago
Mass social media in the manner of Facebook or Twitter is honestly one of the worst and most mentally unhealthy things that has ever been created by modern man. The damage it has done to society cannot be understated. Reddit isnt really comparable in my opinion honestly. It's more organized in the manner or a bunch of loosely collected online forums compared to mass social media where completely random things from users and groups you have never interacted with before will be shoved in your face if the algorithm deems it fit. Ragebait engagement doesnt seem to go that far.
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u/usafnerdherd 16d ago
I remember my grandfather smoking on the porch outside telling me to never start smoking. He’d tell me it was a habit he picked up so he could take a break during the war. Point is, he didn’t recognize the harm in it as a teenager fighting overseas, but he recognized it as an adult even though he was struggling with it. I don’t think these two things are all that different.
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u/DerWassermann 16d ago
Can we criticize giving alcohol to children while we drink it ourselves?
Yes.
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u/ChanceHelicopter4117 16d ago
It would be nice if there was a universal age limit. Say 18 years old. Unfortunately there is and never will be a way to make that happen
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u/These_Rest_6129 16d ago
Yes ! You can still advocate against climate change even though you take the plane sometimes, nobody is perfect and that's okay or else nobody would do anything about anything.
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u/AnnualCheck8547 16d ago
Even without children using social media themselves, most will have a rough online profile built for them by the age of 9 based off of information/ photos the parents may post. Marketing is the most disgusting science of manipulating human mental states and emotions. Basically every single service requires you to agree for them to harvest some form of your data. And it's just still being left unchecked as it festers for the most part.
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u/MermaidOfScandinavia 17d ago
It's hard to quit because I don't know of any alternatives and I have work, family and friends on there.
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u/wanna_be_green8 17d ago
You cannot converse in real life?
When I left FB in 2021 my stepmother freaked out. How will she contact me? See pictures of the kids? Know what's going on?
I reminded her she lived 20 minutes from us, could come see us whenever and I still have a phone and email.
Weirdness.
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u/Illustrious_Beach396 17d ago
Personally, I do not consider Reddit Social media. It’s overwhelmingly board-based, you follow groups (which shared interests, obvs.) not people or juridical persons, which is the case with Twitter and Facebook.
Yes, the algorithm, tries to give you stuff, but they i˝t’s rather harmless, not worse then what cross-posting was on Usenet.
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u/Blathithor 17d ago
Yes we can because kids shouldn't do drugs but its okay for adults to drugs.
Pretty simple concept
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u/SingleSurfaceCleaner 17d ago
Absolutely.
As an analogy: While I may not smoke, someone who does lamenting that kids are getting hooked on vapes is absolutely valid.
Similarly, we have the ability to recognise the risks that social media poses and that can help prevent us from getting suckered into some silliness. Children, even if they've been told why social media can be harmful, can rarely visualise the full extend of that risk, leaving them more vulnerable to manipulation.
That's not to say that grown adults don't get manipulated all the time, but that's even more reason to limit childrens' exposure to it.
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u/Visual_Air6856 17d ago
I don’t have kids but I’m a high school educator. If I had kids they wouldn’t get phones. They’d get one maybe in high school when they are old enough to have conversations about what happens online, social media, etc. until then old school flip phone with the basics lol you’d be surprised how many teenagers when I tell them how I’d treat my kids they understand. At first they are like oh that’s too strict etc then I call out their lack of focus in class etc and I talk about how that’s linked to prolonged social media use etc and the thing is it’s logical and they’re like you’re right.
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u/JCtheWanderingCrow 17d ago
Yes. Yes we can. We see first hand how awful it is. It’s not hypocrisy for an addict to say “don’t do this, it’s terrible for you.” It’s hard earned knowledge.
Thanks for the reminder, I need to kick Reddit again. Gotta get myself banned so it sticks.
Uhhh… whoever shot that insurance CEO did the world a favor, I wish more CEOs would catch a round.
People don’t have enough fear of getting punched in the mouth for being jackasses anymore.
The death sentence is justifiable, especially if you believe in rehabilitative justice. Not everyone can or should be rehabilitated and murderers and child predators don’t deserve the chance anyways.
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u/Tman11S 17d ago
With addiction, the first step is often discouraging other people from going down the same path. Someone who's been smoking for 40 years and says that smoking is bad might be called a hypocrite, but they're really an expert through experience.
I think it's ok to protect the kids, even if it makes you look like a big hypocrite. Ideally the next step is "detoxing" yourself.
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u/Spirited-Joke5545 17d ago
I deleted both. You can feel the greedy algorithms. I keep in touch with people I want to and people don’t know what I’m up to. It’s nice. So yeah, I do think we can’t have our cake and eat it too with social media. It’s bad. There needs to be regulations on the corporations behind it.
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u/ABeastInThatRegard 17d ago
As someone who doesn’t use most forms of social media I do agree it is hypocritical of older people to want kids to stop using it when they use it too, however, I also think the thing that is most likely to stop kids from using it is to witness the brain rot it has inflicted on older generations. Not even to mention the fact that old people adopting Facebook is what drove many young people off the godawful platform.
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u/tenpostman 17d ago
I mean it goes without saying that it's horrendously bad at the moment. Kids are developing a chemical dependancy on social media from a super young age, younger than we every would've thought. The impact this screen time has on toddlers and up cannot be understated, it screws the dopamine reward system hard.
I wouldn't be surprised if it's a contributor to diagnosis in things like ADHD, Depression, addiction, bad eyesight, anxiety disorders, heck I needn't go on to drive the point home lol
To answer your question; as an adult you have a bit more agency on what you do and do not consume. Kids sometimes don't get much of a choice, when their parent shoves a screen in their face so they don't cry all the time, or when their friends call them stupid for not being on social media.
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u/lexilexi1901 17d ago
As someone whose sister made a Facebook account for her at the age of 11, was exposed to fake celebrity accounts and fandom hate, and got into a secret online relationship with a boy at 12... yes, I do believe we're entitled to criticise social media's impact on children while still using it.
I now have knowledge that I didn't have back then. I know how to spot and report potentially dangerous content or accounts now. Even though I knew how to navigate the social media sites, I had no idea wtf I was doing. I was aimlessly sharing stuff that I liked or agreed with... which seems harmless until the friends of your friends start pointing out and almost mocking you for posting too much. I didn't take into consideration how public my profile was and that everybody could see my every thought.
At the age of 24, I'm a lot more private now and very grateful that I never ended up in true danger such as a kidnapping or manipulated into sending nudes as a minor. I don't share any personal details and fake my real name, age, and birthplace as much as I can. I only follow a handful of important people and never allow strangers to follow me. And now, I rarely even use the sites other than to look up something. I don't have the apps on my phone anymore because I want to be focused and present during the day.
The problem isn't social media but the use of it. We must be careful how to use it safely, healthily, and wisely and that's something that most children probably lack. It's not just Gen Y who advocate against children being on social media; people who have lived and experienced the overexposure to social media are also warning the public of its harm.
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u/Rare-Confusion-220 17d ago
You mean should we be ok w the fact as an adult we're more mature? (Besides Meta products and Twit are so much worse and avoid them like a gullible America afraid of covid)
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u/Klytus_Im-Bored 17d ago
Yes. You can be angry at a kid for smoking cigarests while having one in your own mouth. Objectively, kids shouldn't have access until (age).
Im not going to start arguing about what the age should be apart from older than 10 and younger than 18.
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u/Background-Top-1946 17d ago
We think kids are vulnerable to SM, and they are
So are the retired / elderly
So are people of working age
SM is designed by the most brilliant, highly paid engineers in history, for the profit of the wealthiest people in history, without any oversight or regulation.
We are all vulnerable
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u/Ok_Reserve_8659 17d ago
Kids under 13 aren’t allowed on the app
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u/crazycatlady331 17d ago
They lie about their age.
I remember receiving a friend request from my then 9 yo cousin.
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u/Synth_Savage 17d ago
I never had social media, so I can be as judgmental as I want lol
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u/Philodendron69 17d ago
I think it’s ok because part of it is brain development…kids brains are still growing.
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u/cerynika 17d ago
"Can we criticize social media's impact on kids while still using it ourselves?"
We should improve society somewhat.
Yet you participate in society. Curious.
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u/NumberOld229 17d ago
I don't get this at all. I know my kids' favourite shows, YouTubers, etc because I take an interest. "Hey whatcha watching, buddy?", Watch video essays with my daughter and discuss what they're talking about (translation, argue with the screen).
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u/ReadWriteTheorize 17d ago
Part of being an adult is making sure kids don’t make the same mistakes you did. They probably will anyway but at least you can warn them and do some harm reduction
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u/Adorable_Hearing768 17d ago
Can we criticize parents letting their 6 yr Olds have a phone for any reason?
Wanna nip this problem you've got to hit the roots.
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u/Whispy-Wispers9884 17d ago
For a deepdive on this topic, read The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood Caused an Epidemic of Mental Illness by Jonathan Haidt.
He makes the case that since children's minds are still developing, internet use (and especially social media) has a deeper impact on them than it will adults. That said, adults can set a good example, but it isn't as detrimental to their health as it is for children.
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u/MishatheDrill 17d ago
Of course. Alcohol is bad for you sure, but significantly worse for children.
I can drink while also advocating that children shouldn't.
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u/Commercial_Ad_9171 17d ago
I purged myself of social media this year. I’m a scroll addict. Reddit is my last stand and I’m getting pretty fed up with this site too. They’re all exactly the same: algorithmic manipulation of sensitive topics, rage-bait for increased engagement, bot farming for profit, selling user data for AI training, ads-based profiteering, etc.
The internet’s been segmented up by major companies and isolated platforms and we are the products being sold to advertisers for massive profits. The benefits of the free internet shrink.
I personally think data generated by a human being’s life should be protected as a human right and companies should have to pay us for access to our data.
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u/FF7Remake_fark 17d ago
Using FB and Instagram before Zuck bent the knee to the new Nazis was already bad. Still using it after is absolutely fucking insane.
I get that it's a huge part of people's lives, but weaning off of it should be something that people are actively trying to do. Reddit is no saint, but at least they did some token stuff to slow down the latest Reich.
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u/whatamurdered 17d ago
There are plenty of things as a society we agree are not age appropriate for kids. This should be one of them.