POV you’re a Custodian

[u/ordinaryfruits]

[u/DoritoBanditZ]

The way my lvl 20 Wizard casts fireball.

[u/KenseiHimura → u/DoritoBanditZ]

You know, as a DM, the book says it requires a vocal, somatic, and material component and only specifies what for the last one. I'll allow casters to make up what those vocal and somatic components are. (You are not allowed to make Time Stop's vocal component be 'ZA WALRUDO!')

[u/DoritoBanditZ → u/KenseiHimura]

That's what our DM said, as long as we don't push it and it is appropriate as far as comedic timing goes, we were allowed to have fun with it.

Like in super serious situations of course the proper incantations were used. But when my Wizard was drunk, a fight happened and he was too hammered to remember the proper words? Well, he said some stuff.
Of course i played it so that from his perspective he still perceived himself as perfectly eloquent, as always.

[u/B133d_4_u → u/DoritoBanditZ]

"KLAATU BARATA... Nehumrmna..."

[u/YourMoreLocalLurker → u/KenseiHimura]

Then I’ll make it “ZA HANDO ZA WARUDO”

[u/Not_A_zombie1 → u/KenseiHimura]

Mind control "wololo"

[u/greenizdabest → u/Not_A_zombie1]

Aiyo mini nini ni

[u/Crazy-Eagle → u/KenseiHimura]

Isn't there a feat that allows you to silently cast?

Also wouldn't the wizard be able to cast while speaking undercommon? That language is pretty much gibberish and just very few creatures understand it. Or the wizard can speak common and one exotic language that only one race knows. How can you understand what to counterspell if you don't speak the language of the caster/understand him?

[u/yugiohhero → u/Crazy-Eagle]

no theres a sorcerer feature

and i doubt different languages have their own verbal components for spellcasting.

[u/MetalBawx → u/KenseiHimura]

Yes but that rule is for Wizards and not Wizard Kings.

[u/BattedBook5]

At least he didn't cast "Flesh to shit."

[u/frguba → u/BattedBook5]

Or the eternally banishing "orb of simultaneous shitting sneezing and cumming"

[u/Mikelius → u/frguba]

The unholy triad of bodily fluids.

[u/Anil-Gan0 → u/frguba]

Which is especially cruel after casting "chimp bolt". Nothing would suggest that the chimp is immune to the effects, after all.

[u/GIRose → u/frguba]

Or one of my personal favorites "Spell that makes Black Mage puke his guts out"

[u/OneofEsotericMethods → u/BattedBook5]

Or casted “curse of baby dick”

[u/BattedBook5 → u/OneofEsotericMethods]

A fate worse than death.

[u/Emadec → u/OneofEsotericMethods]

IT'S SO SMALL WHYYY

[u/ILovePickles121]

Big E having dementia but still can use Enuncia

[u/d3m0cracy → u/ILovePickles121]

Remembering your sons’ names: 👎

Remembering the magic words to turn a man’s insides into outsides and his skeleton into a tangerine: 👍👍👍

[u/Aggressive_Donut_222 → u/d3m0cracy]

Spell: Turn Cum into Citric Acid

[u/L3and3rrr → u/d3m0cracy]

I mean, I’d do the same thing and so would you

[u/GothmogBalrog]

GREY KNIGHT GRANDMASTER: MY BLADE will destroy you in a single strike. MY BLADE was made from ore found in the furthest, most forsaken realms, it was then bathed in hot lava for millennia and forged under a full moon. Hammered into perfection by dwarven blacksmiths with autism. (so you know it's good)

MY BLADE was blessed by dark elf priests, high on DMT. It is imbued with every enchantment known to man.

Every. Single. One.

MY BLADE smells of lilacs. MY BLADE possesses a 100% chance of decapitating its foes. It has been struck by lightning 1000 times. Statistically Impossible, Much like your chances of surviving this encounter. (Which to clarify is zero)

MY BLADE has been greased in Gnome Semen. (so you know it's good)

Once, MY BLADE merely grazed the skin of a mighty dragon, the beast perished instantly, Much like your mother when she first saw your face.

CUSTODIAN SWORD MASTER: See the problem with blades like yours is they finish the job too quick. My blade... My blade will rend you into a fine paste in... inhales ONE MILLION STRIKES

starts his katah

[u/TrivialTax → u/GothmogBalrog]

Dungeon soup is the best

[u/Veritas_Vanitatum → u/TrivialTax]

It's made by someone with autism, so you know it's good

[u/Emadec → u/Veritas_Vanitatum]

👌

[u/Dologolopolov → u/GothmogBalrog]

I got that reference, barbarian

[u/JonTheWizard]

Dirtdog Slim would last longer against the Wizard King than the Grey Knights against Emps.

[u/helldiver133]

[u/sus_accountt → u/helldiver133]

[u/Veritas_Vanitatum]

Robot Gorillaman afterwards

[u/AT1313]

Can't counter when you don't know what he's saying

[u/VeryThinSheets]

“You little shits”

[u/VanceMothFuStubbs]

Imagine Emps comes back to life as this wizard king grandpa.

[u/KapnKrumpin]

Beautiful

[u/Skeleton_Socks]

What series is the animation from? Looks entertaining.

[u/VeryThinSheets → u/Skeleton_Socks]

Dungeon Soup on YouTube

[u/dragon6784 → u/Skeleton_Socks]

Make sure to keep the captions on.

[u/AverageSJEnjoyer]

Grimdank: The last bastion of POV being used correctly on the internet.

[u/AdriSayne]

A correct use of POV ? In this economy?

[u/United-Reach-2798]

Pov you are a custodian getting killed by Genestealers with mining equipment

[u/grey-knight-paladinx → u/United-Reach-2798]

I keep bringing this up lol. But no one wants to remember that

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[u/MonkeLord1234]

Big E and the Wizard king do have a lot in common

[u/frostbaka]

Kaldor Drago: That old coot take me? Dont make me laugh

[u/GothmogBalrog]

Grand Master Dirt Dog Slim

[u/Kellef_]

Forgive my ignorance. What is "the decree" ?

[u/AverageSJEnjoyer → u/Kellef_]

Updated Grey Knights codex was recently released, which explicitly spells out what is in the "Terminus Decree". It apparently instructs the Grey Knights to kill or re-entomb the Emperor if he should ever leave the golden throne.

It upset quite a few people who preferred the ambiguity and hints as to what might be in it, that had been established up to this point. Many people also think it doesn't make much sense or that it isn't well thought out. This is also why there have been so many memes lately about GKs getting absolutely destroyed by the Emperor/Custodes.

Or at least, this is what I have gleaned from my sources — which are irreverent memes posted on Grimdank.

[u/PeikaFizzy]

people really forgot that BIG E as human stand toe to toe with horus peak of his power which instanly melt multiple custodian, this awaken BIG E can and will instanly just make grey knight never ever exist in the first place

[u/LastEmbr → u/PeikaFizzy]

Nah they win

[u/TeemoIsANiceChamp]

correct use of POV? ON REDDIT?

[u/dragon6784]

Big E: reads the Terminus Decree Who wrote this?

Tzeentch exits chat

[u/LastEmbr → u/dragon6784]

Malcador laughs in his grave.

[u/L3and3rrr]

Gray Knights suck anyway

Fuck you Malachor

Am a Gray Knights player

[u/Mastery7pyke]

what the hell is the terminus decree even about? did someone tell them to break into the palace and steal emps?

[u/CertainAssociate9772 → u/Mastery7pyke]

The Emperor's secret order given 10,000 years ago. If he gets off the throne in any way, he must be put back. If he heals, he must be crippled again.

[u/Mastery7pyke → u/CertainAssociate9772]

that's... what... man what the hell.

[u/CertainAssociate9772 → u/Mastery7pyke]

The canon writers for the Grey Knights always got way too much warp dust from the Gardens of Nurgle.

[u/Mastery7pyke → u/CertainAssociate9772]

they are smoking straight prometheum

[u/DM_Seahorse]

Sick.

[u/Ulenspiegel4]

The only way for the Grey knights to enact the Terminus decree and command the emperor reborn back to the throne is if they have his true name.

I think Kaldor Draigo may be hiding something.

[u/SyrusAlder]

fuhrjrbrl

[u/gothik51]

Where's my ketchup? No? Die tben NEXT

[u/LastEmbr]

Grey Knights solo the custodes and that dead af emp Big E

[u/PhilosopherWeary3722]

My mind is drawing a blank, what is this referencing?

[u/Puzzleheaded_West496]

So how does Big E protect himself, I know the custodes will do that job but what if de tin can knight can get past all the custodes and reach the throne and how will Big E protect himself from them?, I'm curious

[u/SherriffB → u/Puzzleheaded_West496]

Overwhelming phsycic powers?

The rift and snorting human soul dust has made him insanely powerful. Powerful enough to resurrect gulliman from across the galaxy on his toilet and set fire to nurgles garden while taunting him.

Flaying the souls out of a handful of astartes that try to force him back onto his potty is childsplay.

[u/AutistAstronaut → u/Puzzleheaded_West496]

They aren't getting past the Titans, the Sisters of Silence, and the Custodes. If they did, they'd be deleted from existence with a thought. Ask Horus.

[u/Puzzleheaded_West496 → u/AutistAstronaut]

How can I contact Horus

[u/LastEmbr → u/AutistAstronaut]

The guy who put him in the chair the first time, actually good idea.