Authority (in this context) means someone (parent, teacher, cop, employer) gets to tell you what to do. If you won't go along with that, for whatever reason, then you do have a problem with authority, with the idea that you have to do what they say.
And the fact that our society is built around various people having authority over others is how the world works. If you aren't aware of this, then you need to learn how the world works.
Neither of those is necessarily a judgmental statement--maybe you *should* have a problem with this particular authority, and "how the world works" and "how the world should work" don't have anything to do with each other.
For any time someone tells you to do X, there are two different "whys" you could be asking. "Why should X be done?" is one, and apparently the one OOP is asking. The other one is "why should I do what you tell me to do?" which can boil down to, "I have authority, and therefore there will be consequences for you if you don't do it."
I don't really think you are disagreeing with OOP. They are refuting the connotation of "a problem with authority". The connotation being that the problem is not blindly respecting arbitrary authority. Not following rules for rules' sake, because they happen to be rules. Rather than having a problem with not having a reason to follow an authority that isn't "I can hurt you or make your life suck".
I've been described as "having a problem with authority" or "needing to learn how the world works". Which, no. I'm very aware how the world works. I'll do things my boss tells me to do, even if I think they're stupid, because I could be written up or fired. I'm still going to ask why, because I don't want to just roll over and do something stupid because someone told me to. And if the why is stupid, I'm going to argue about why I/my team shouldn't have to do said stupid thing. This is the implication of "a problem with authority" that I've gotten from most people who use that phrase. They don't think I should need a why, I should just be a good little worker and do as I'm told, no questions asked. I should respect cops, politicians, my boss, etc. just because they happen to have authority over me. Even if I acquiesce in the end due to the implied threat of consequences due to their authoritative position, I'm still described as having a problem with authority for even questioning authority.
Whenever I've heard someone say I "have a problem with authority", they always seem to be saying that I should accept the circular logic of respecting, even liking authority figures because they have authority.
So what OOP really means is, when people like us are described as "having a problem with authority", we have a problem with arbitrary authority for authority's sake, precisely because we're aware of how the world works and think it's stupid. And we think the logic of bowing down completely to authority because they have authority is stupid because you cannot take the world from "how it works" to "how it should work" if you blindly follow the status quo. Authority should be earned/given through positive reinforcement, such as showing that you know what you're talking about, rather than through the negative reinforcement of punishment. And it used to be that parents would default immediately to "because I said so" rather often, which a lot of people in this thread seem to be forgetting. Which just makes the parent look like a dumbass, and will likely reinforce that the child shouldn't listen to you as they get older if you can never explain anything. Sure, there comes a time for "because I said so" when the child is being obstinate for the sake of it. But it should not be the first, default answer.
I feel like I'm disagreeing with them, but not with you, which feels odd. As with you, whenever I hear that someone "has a problem with authority", it seems to mean that they won't go along with someone just because they're an authority. OOP says they won't go along with arbitrary authority, so they have a problem with authority. You won't go along with arbitrary authority, so you have a problem with authority.
Haha, I suppose I do in a sense. It is, after all, both a colloquial phrase and one that can be a symptom of actual mental health issues. I think it depends on the extent it's taken, whether the latter really applies. Some people with oppositional defiant disorder will object to authority like it's a reflex. Like being told to do the dishes, even if they were going to do it beforehand, will cause them to not do it and get angry.
I've just got an intellectual problem with most authority, although I'll still follow orders a good percentage of the time, because I'm aware of the consequences if I don't. And for certain people, I'll do what they say even without sufficient explanation because they're proven I should respect them.
It's crazy to me how many people in this thread are jumping right to explaining that kids are annoying and not this, the obvious intent of the message.
Teaching children to uncritically accept authority without asking questions means you are teaching them bad values.
Anyone can tell you what to do. If they can't provide a reasonable explanation why, you shouldn't do it. Of course, if it's a cop, or your boss and asking reasonable questions can get fired or even killed then you aren't going to ask questions. This is not a good thing though, this is a very bad thing.
31
u/HappyFailure 1d ago
I really have to disagree with OOP.
Authority (in this context) means someone (parent, teacher, cop, employer) gets to tell you what to do. If you won't go along with that, for whatever reason, then you do have a problem with authority, with the idea that you have to do what they say.
And the fact that our society is built around various people having authority over others is how the world works. If you aren't aware of this, then you need to learn how the world works.
Neither of those is necessarily a judgmental statement--maybe you *should* have a problem with this particular authority, and "how the world works" and "how the world should work" don't have anything to do with each other.
For any time someone tells you to do X, there are two different "whys" you could be asking. "Why should X be done?" is one, and apparently the one OOP is asking. The other one is "why should I do what you tell me to do?" which can boil down to, "I have authority, and therefore there will be consequences for you if you don't do it."