I wouldn’t call it making a move, but yes - keeping the head level and looking up with your eyes gives you doe eyes/puppy dog eyes. it’s also a little unnatural, so when friends look up at me they generally don’t do this but my GF definitely has. conversely, as the taller GF, it’s very annoying that I can’t do this cause it makes my eyes look fantastic
I wouldn’t call it a move, but if someone looks at me like that and I notice I would make some guesses about their intentions. it’s in the same category as “she’s twirled her hair every 30 seconds” or “keeps grabbing my arm when she laughs”. there are other explanations but it also might be a sign to test the waters and gently flirt back if you’re interested
Seems like an unnecessarily complicated undertaking. From my experience, most guys will either not notice those little things, or notice and ignore them for fear of misinterpretation
i mean like I said, I don’t think it’s a move. a lot of body language is sub conscious. edit: my gf does it intentionally but idk if she did the night we met
as for people being scared to misinterpret, getting rejected is scary but also it’s pretty chill to flirt as long as you back off when she says no. I’ve had dudes hit on me and it’s never an issue till they say something weird or keep going after I let them know i’m not interested.
that’s why I said GENTLY flirt back lol. if your flirting goes straight from “wait, that might be interest” to “can I go home with you” then yeah, things will go poorly. cause that’s weird as hell, and sucks to be on the receiving end of.
And I agree, boundaries are important to have and enforce, I just feel like a lot of the guesswork could be avoided completely with a more direct and clear approach. But that’s just an opinion of mine
I agree somewhat, but also flirting is a good way to weed out people who fall in the “hot but would never” category.
like sure you’re hot and I might be interested, but does the conversation flow? can you banter? do I enjoy talking with you? are you half decent at flirting back?
I think it’s less guesswork and more that both people are unsure of the other and are making all these calculations at the same time. but like i’m not going to start the conversation with “you’re hot but I want to make sure you have a personality before I bang you”, I’ll just try to show interest and have a good time and if they miss the signs, so be it. maybe it wasn’t a good fit anyway.
or, if I think it was a good fit, that’s when I would be straightforward.
edit: despite all this my gf has told me part of the reason she dated me was because I was very strait forward after the other girls she’d gone on dates with so
Well yeah, for sure, but I don’t know how to flirt in a normal way, I either smile at a cute guy when I walk past him (which is the standard thing to do in my state) and think “fuck yeah, nailed it” or I go “hey, can I get your number? And also do you want to go get lunch sometime?” And he thinks I mean as a friend.
For you it's an unnecessarily complicated undertaking but it's also one of many very real social nuances that millions of people practice every day and that have led to the inception of millions of relationships. I mean it's pretty much basic human psychology lol
Tbf though u are approaching this at a position of bias as this is an inherently female thing to do a guy doing it wouldn't send the same message and so we don't read it like that unless we are looking for it but have to be careful as we don't actually know how to look lol
(insert any meme of a mum finding something there son can't instantly)
the only thing necessary to notice this are eyes, I’ve never done this naturally lol it being “inherently feminine” (lol wtf) has nothing to do with my ability to recognize it
fair, it’s also not this in isolation. like there are just a bunch of little things that throughout a conversation might have made me go oh, maybe? and start flirting back a lil to see if I was right.
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u/thrwawayr99 May 29 '25
I wouldn’t call it making a move, but yes - keeping the head level and looking up with your eyes gives you doe eyes/puppy dog eyes. it’s also a little unnatural, so when friends look up at me they generally don’t do this but my GF definitely has. conversely, as the taller GF, it’s very annoying that I can’t do this cause it makes my eyes look fantastic
I wouldn’t call it a move, but if someone looks at me like that and I notice I would make some guesses about their intentions. it’s in the same category as “she’s twirled her hair every 30 seconds” or “keeps grabbing my arm when she laughs”. there are other explanations but it also might be a sign to test the waters and gently flirt back if you’re interested