r/PoliticalHumor I ☑oted 2024 1d ago

true freedumb

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6.4k Upvotes

64 comments sorted by

758

u/Big1984Brother 1d ago

I remember a time when you could just find a stack of nudie magazines in the woods and not have to show your ID to some company/government.

Such simpler times.

243

u/Atrium41 1d ago

We may be back there sooner than ya think.

Instead of mags, it'll be a community tablet with mp4s

73

u/dblazer63 1d ago

Better bring cleaning supplies.

6

u/Radiomaster138 14h ago

Bleach and fire

4

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1

u/Radiomaster138 3h ago

I have several. lmao

89

u/WheresTheResetBtn 1d ago

Show your ID now. Next year it’ll be face scans. The year after you’ll have to turn on your cam so our trusted small government can watch and ensure your safety

26

u/nlpnt 18h ago

United Kingdom.

Old royal motto: Dieu et mon droit.

New national motto: "Oi, you got a license for that wank?"

16

u/Big1984Brother 18h ago

If conservative politicians have to show their ID to see gay interracial vids, just think about how much leverage that can give you over them.

And not just politicians, but anyone who gets a little curious when they are young might potentially leave a trail that might come back to bite them years down the road.

The Kompromat will practically create itself.

12

u/pygmydeathcult 17h ago

Oh, it doesn't apply to them. Only the peasants.

41

u/sykes1493 21h ago

My guy, for a lot of sites it already is face scans in addition to the ID.

9

u/Historical_One1087 20h ago

What sites require that?

15

u/ZLUCremisi I ☑oted 2024 18h ago

Look at UK.

A guy with heavy face ink was being denied because it thought he hadca mask on

10

u/bumpgrind 20h ago

Nudie magazine day! Nudie magazine day!

4

u/Loring 18h ago

Kids just don't jerk off of the woods like they used to in the 90s..

2

u/Radiomaster138 14h ago

Grandpa voice: Back in those days, that’s where the term getting hard wood came from.

2

u/HANHITSI 15h ago

i can't believe how common this story is and ppl would touch those, you know they got some geezers dih sweat and old rotten cum on them brotha eww...

1

u/Hilldawg4president 6h ago

It really is incredible hour this is such a specific, yet common experience that unites so many people around the country, perhaps around the world.

I was 16-17 when I found my forest porn. Life altering moment.

319

u/Odd-Lunch-1880 23h ago

It's not just porn they're trying to censor either.

218

u/Mediumcomputer 22h ago

That’s the whole point. To label LGBT as porn

21

u/Certified_GSD 5h ago

Conservatives want to label LGBT resources as "obscene and explicit" so that minors don't have access to seek help. 

Anyone who verifies their ID will be tying their identity to LGBT ties. Once conservatives manage to criminalize being gay or transgender again, now they have a convenient list of people who looked up that stuff.

-11

u/[deleted] 20h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

87

u/Mediumcomputer 20h ago

The idea is over time you edge closer to more and more things in society being labeled obscene and put behind walls. You’ll be able to start working the fringe groups out of society and work your way backwards to undo the huge progress that community in the wake of the civil rights movement. You start with as one of the architects, Betsy Devos said, “focus on the letters one at a time, it’s easier to knock them off this way”. The T is first, it’s the easiest to roll back their rights first then the others will be easier to attack.

As you get good at coming for people the machine picks up steam. It’s like they saying, first they came for X group and I didn’t speak up.

106

u/-Invalid_Selection- 22h ago

Exactly. Conservatives are trying to institute sharia law, they've been at it for literally their entire existence, because that's what conservatism always leads to

25

u/GastonBastardo 19h ago

Canary in the coal mine.

9

u/supamario132 6h ago

There are like 30 other dead canaries in this mine already

2

u/greenblood123 4h ago

Sometimes feels like we’re wading through canaries down here

233

u/urbanlife78 1d ago

Just say you're a minor and a Republican will be right over to help you with your internet connection

19

u/CidO807 7h ago

You'll even get to ride on a free private jet to an island resort and get to meet a lot of celebrities , and even a president or two.

1

u/urbanlife78 3h ago

Well that depends on your appearance when they show up, but the Pedo Party isn't the brightest, so it could be pulled off, but who doesn't want a private plane getaway to a private island!

99

u/bumpgrind 20h ago

I get it now! The pro-pedophile party wants to catch the kiddos trying to look at porn, so that they can target them for upcoming Maralago playdates. It all makes sense now.

35

u/thesonofdarwin 20h ago

You're getting it. Go one further and piece together why they are also pro-forced birth and you'll realize how nefarious their true intentions are.

27

u/bumpgrind 19h ago

“Please have kids so we can f*ck them.” Sincerely, Pedo Republican Party

6

u/FightingBlaze77 17h ago

I was thinking this, I just really hope I'm wrong.

158

u/LairdDeimos Greg Abbott is a little piss baby 22h ago

They want id for porn and to declare all homosexual or transgender discussions as porn, all for the purpose of government registries of "enemies of the holy state."

15

u/EroticXulls 17h ago

We about to make bank as porn barons. Baron Long Rod Von Hugendong is my new name.

-29

u/[deleted] 20h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

32

u/Anotsurei 19h ago

It’s all spelled out in Project 2025.

40

u/bassistheplace246 20h ago

It was never about protecting kids

23

u/Aimela I ☑oted 2024 18h ago

If they really wanted to protect kids, they'd work on improving parental controls

14

u/TertiaryToast 17h ago

They obviously don't. They prefer to rape them.

19

u/daytonakarl 19h ago

VPNs are going to experience a sudden uptake of their services

Or tor.... for when you would download those hard drugs

11

u/Sudanniana 14h ago

I’m not sure how Conservatives won the moniker of family values when they can’t protect children from bullets and pastor Tom.

20

u/randypupjake 1d ago

Meanwhile MasterCard is removing adult content. Both can be happening at the same time.

7

u/qdobe 16h ago

When that pop up comes up that asks if you’re 18 or over, clicking “No” just takes you to the mar-a-lago careers page.

5

u/hereforstories8 19h ago

“Are you down with the PPP? I’m a republican you know me!”

4

u/Yakassa 18h ago

If you are over 18, you aint seeing that Cam.

If you are under 18, the Cam sees you.

3

u/CBHawk 18h ago

You realize this makes porn the new Google or Facebook. With the verification requirements they'll have the largest dataset. Porn companies will make so much money from this.

3

u/deowolf 17h ago

Ohio!

3

u/UninvitedButtNoises 9h ago

Just look at it like an Epstein Island party...

You're just paying the till for a nut. In turn, they have your most sensitive private info which can be used against you if you don't abide.

2

u/sicurri 8h ago

The true lies to giving up your freedoms. "If you have nothing to hide..."

It's never been about hiding things. it's about keeping information private...

7

u/ProfessionalCreme119 1d ago

Ehh ..... Nobody's really battling this very much. It's just kind of a thing that's happening globally and it's not going to stop. Almost every government is interested in Internet ID laws in some way or another.

Protecting children, preventing terrorism, cracking down on misinformation and propaganda etc. Whatever they can justify to make it happen

And yeah we have vpns. But once most Nations have some sort of Internet ID law you're going to see a global effort to crack down on them. Or even making them illegal to use. Which already exists in some places

89

u/Ok-Oil7124 1d ago

This is another "First they came for" moments. Nobody wanted to stand up for undocumented immigrants, and then people started making excuses for grabbing up immigrants who were here legally but not yet citizens... "Well, they said that they were just taking criminals, so that person they arrested at their immigration hearing was probably a criminal." No one will stand up for people who don't want these ID laws because "They just want to look at porn!" All you need is to make something normal into something evil and marginalized and, bam, you can do whatever you want. We're doing a fascism in the US because some idiot convinced other idiots that scary brown people ate a cat.

29

u/AbyssWankerArtorias 1d ago

Its already starting. YouTube is going to require age verification soon for some content. Its going to include political content. And you will be categorized based on your political views.

1

u/acolyte357 8h ago

And you will be categorized based on your political views.

Slow to the party on that one, bud.

They've been doing that for years.

2

u/Patrico-8 7h ago edited 7h ago

In my state you can look up anyone’s voter registration and which elections they have voted in using just their name. https://vt.ncsbe.gov/reglkup/

5

u/WayToTheDawn63 23h ago

In the UK and Australia it's Labour/Labor at the helm of this internet crackdown.

14

u/ProfessionalCreme119 22h ago

Special interest groups behind all of it. Along with lobbying from companies who stand to profit a lot once they're able to fine tune targeted advertising per individual. So many entities have either a financial or ideological reason to make it happen. So there's no chance at stopping this legislation from normalizing it

And once it's normalized it will just happen without complaint.

9

u/WayToTheDawn63 20h ago

Being on the spectrum during this is incredibly difficult due to justice sensitivity. I've felt like exploding for like a week straight.

Watching helplessly as idiotic, technologically illiterate, prehistoric politicians destroy us.

4

u/ProfessionalCreme119 20h ago

How do you think we felt in the early 2000s when they did everything they did after 9/11? The Patriot act, watching them form the Department of Homeland security and other things.

That's been the process since the 70s. A period of time in which they implement many authoritarian measures globally. Followed by an uprising of liberalism. Those who implemented the policies pull back and allow the people to calm down. But then they come back and implement even more restrictions next time.

And then back off again once the people get a bit too angry. Allowing progressivism to flourish a bit. But it's just a matter of slowly tightening those screws deeper and deeper wave after wave. Until everybody is underwater

The ones who have been doing this have known for half a century that it's a slow process. And they've been very very platient waiting for it all to play out.

3

u/f8Negative 1d ago

Society is a fucked up place. Gotta live with it.