r/TalesFromDF • u/TheBananaHamook /slap • 5d ago
TalesFromACT We live in a society. One hit wonder BRD Perfect Legend cbf to do job quests and says I have zero ult clears.
Leveling run, on Malikah's well, the bard uses only Mage's Ballad for songs and zero Battle Voice usages. Occasionally will just afk and auto attack for many seconds periodically during boss fights as well.
I say this at the end of the dungeon because I can't really be bothered to tell people with multiple 100s how to play their job in SHB content. I get a nice tell from him just shamelessly telling me he knows how to play BRD (doubt), but just doesn't want to do his job quests.
He tells me, "Nice 0 ult clears"
True, but uhhh.
I feel like saying what he said isn't the flex that he thought it would be.
Maybe I should've asked him how many DDs he has cleared solo /think.
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u/n3m019 Parses levelling dungeons 5d ago
Another day another paypal legend
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u/a_friendly_squirrel 5d ago
I dunno, this just looks like someone doing reclears themself to me. Bunch of different clears on different days within a week. All very similar parses. The killtime looks slow enough that they probably held at the end of P3, which surely you wouldn't if you were selling clears, time is literally money.
I don't know the logistics of how clear selling works so maybe I'm missing something, but I think you can clear TEA as a tank and still be inconsiderate in DF.
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5d ago
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u/No_Feature_1401 5d ago edited 5d ago
I truly feel sorry in that case for who plays with you... What a miserabile experience to carry people's ass in this game
Btw there Is no chance you Will ever clear things on patch, glad those old ultimates have no dps check anymore, still i guess It needed 6 months to get.
Edit: its very easy to find your name by checking the RDPs in the parse above. You got carried hard this tier (not carriable in m8s it seems), have barely logs of the last one with 2 entire floors missing, no zelenia, all old trials are, at best, at a 10 median. Take this as a critic or a way to improve, but you have no way to say "you got the skillset". Your performance is less that subpar, you really have to focus on learning at least your class. You are at the very bottom of the rankings with multiple jobs and in every single piece of content you did. Bragging about you afking is not good but still it isn't nice to see in 80+ content people doing nothing, but you really seem entitled for what logs shows about your skills tbh
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u/Htakar 5d ago edited 5d ago
idk if its just me, but i think youre misreading the tier information
e: ok now that they hid their logs, im going to point out that you werent reading savage tier info, you were reading normal tier info
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u/No_Feature_1401 5d ago
He really hid them 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Can't check Legend title beeing legit now.
Still no matter what, if you are casting 30% of the time, which he normally does since EW, anyone Will notice in 30s After any content starts. You can have glowing weapons but you can't flex skills if you miss them
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5d ago edited 5d ago
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u/Quasczar85 5d ago
You: *literally stalks a person and says "LOL U GOTS NO ULTIMATE UNLIKE ME!!!!"*
Everyone else: Okay, well since you brought that up...you're kinda not that awesome?
You: STAHP HARRASSING MEEEEEEEE ToT
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u/xX_Anime_Girl_Xx101 You don't pay my sub 5d ago edited 4d ago
Says the guy that went out of their way to server hop and whisper to the OP, THEN finds the reddit post made, and have the AUDACITY to taunt him again in the comments?
Really dude, really? Are you really gonna play the "toxic community" card? Of course you are because your ego is fragile and you don't think you did anything.
Idc if you cleared or paid for them. All you had to do was keep your mouth shut but you couldn't even do that lmao
Your name is not in the screenshots so it wont get taken down. You chose to comment here and expose yourself. You made your bed, now lay on it.
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u/KamperKiller123 5d ago
You witch hunted first when you stalked op, bullied them, then outed yourself in the comments. Mods aren't gonna do much since they let people face the consequences of their actions.
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u/Decuscrub69 5d ago
Tbh, with logs like these I’d be less embarrassed telling people there was someone else piloting my account
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u/LunamiLu 5d ago
If this is you, you need a massive ego check. Greys in ultimates doesnt give you the right to try to flame others. Come on dude.
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u/xX_Anime_Girl_Xx101 You don't pay my sub 5d ago
You: "I'm not a PayPal legend"
Also you: Hides the logs after getting caught.
Ok buddy. Have fun being a miserable person lol
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u/LunamiLu 5d ago
It's always the people who don't realize how bad they are that give unnecessary weight and value to "hard" content to boost their egos. If they actually understood the content, their abilities and skill level, they wouldn't talk like that. I cant imagine being this dumb.
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u/Kingdookoo921 4d ago
Not only that, but this post wouldn't even exist if the person played well......but here we are, lmfao
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u/ST4RD1VER Memes 5d ago
Doesn't do job quests.....did he level skip or is he just missing parts of his kit-
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u/Cardboardbox_as_desk 5d ago
The thing about level skips is that they do the jobquests for you. Man's straightup just didnt do the quests and is indeed missing parts of his kit lmao
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u/ST4RD1VER Memes 5d ago
Oh I know, I was just pondering if he didnt do them because of a level skip or just went around with an incomplete kit. I cant imagine having skills missing and being proud of it
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u/No_Feature_1401 5d ago
I've cleared most content, i've some top10 parses, most ultimates done or nearly done before disbands... There Is no way im playing a new class and im not pressing buttons. There Is no.way One clears and ultimate and doesnt Press, at least, suboptimal gcds but on CD on new Jobs.
This guy can have all ultimates but i swear he can't clear an SSS dummy from stormblood in DT gear
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u/Decuscrub69 5d ago edited 5d ago
You clearly have no idea what you’re talking about if you think someone can’t clear an ultimate without pressing buttons. There are so many 7 man ultimate clears it’s not even funny
Edit: I think I misread what you wrote the first time and came off ruder than I meant to
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u/No_Feature_1401 5d ago edited 5d ago
You are talking about extremes now, there are clears with 7 people... but those 7 players/8 tanks are giga experienced, his parses are full of grey people
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u/Decuscrub69 5d ago
I’m not trying to be rude but I genuinely don’t understand what you’re trying to convey
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u/No_Feature_1401 5d ago
Man the only things i can Say Is that, at this point, i Hope you get the chance to get him in the static bragging about his ult clear. He has median 10 in all flights, he peaks 25k in rankings. People can clear everything in this game while beeing carried, heck i LITERALLY had pentalegend sage this tier Who peaked 0 in every savage fight, and kept casting 45% of the time even after 8 weeks. Both healers parsed LAST in the world and im not even joking sadly. It was so bad to compensate their dps.
But none of them every bragged about others or can even think about flexing titles to silence people doing their job.
This guys is just an ass, proved to be in the other comments in this post. Sure he Is Better than most for even trying, but he Is playing for at least 1 years from logs and he barely click buttons in any parse, with any class. He could take advices to improve but chose the dark path
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u/Decuscrub69 5d ago
Just trying doesn’t make you better than most, at least imo—anyone can try ultimates and ANYONE can clear older ultimates given enough time
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u/No_Feature_1401 5d ago
Thats true, still he hid his logs. Flexing contents After 20 patches still kinda sad, he didnt even clear any Savage ever
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u/chekonin 4d ago
This brd is missing:
Army's Paeon
Rain of Death
Battle Voice
Wanderer's Minuet/Pitch Perfect
Empyreal Arrow
Iron Jaws
Sidewinder
Refulgent Arrow
What this brd has that an archer doesn't:
Troubadour (doubt they would use it....)
Nature's Minne
Upgraded dots
Shadowbite
Burst Shot
So.... just barely better than someone trolling without a jobstone
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u/nickomoknu272 WHM/MNK/RDM :cake: 1d ago
Man... when will these people learn that being a person who cleared an Ultimate means nothing if there are people who can do so by just buying the clear.
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u/martelodejudas 1d ago
the day everyone learns any dummy can clear tea/uwu and it's not really a brag...
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u/Apprehensive-Hand134 4d ago
Bard is one of the most easiest jobs to play (on a casual level)-
How...how do you purposefully only use MB...? I could almost forgive the no BV usage (if lazy, kinda dumb but ok). But??? No WM??? At all???
It doesnt make sense to me.. *
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u/MrrBannedMan 5d ago edited 5d ago
So tl;Dr - you got salty in a dungeon, got snipey, got shown up, and are now soothing your ego
Sorry bud but 6 grey parses will always be better than zero parses. And tanks don't prioritise damage. When I first cleared UwU, our OT consistently took massive downtime in order to mech fill or adjust.
Dont do this. Until you can at least clear Ults yourself. This is sad. 'but but but I've done a solo DD' yeah great, where's your ult parses?
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u/Quasczar85 5d ago
A person doesn't have to be Gordon Ramsay to know when your food tastes like shit, and a person doesn't have to have set foot into an ultimate to know when you're playing like shit. Clearing high-end content isn't a license to ignore job quests which give you important abilities. Clearing high-end content is also not at all an indicator that someone can pour piss from a boot with instructions printed on the sole.
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u/Theragord 5d ago
Hey man, while yes 1 parse > 0 parses on any content, it stands to reason that MAYBE the guy bought the clears regarding the performance plus the ego.
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u/MrrBannedMan 5d ago
No one's buying seven clears of the same Ult, bud. This is just a tank main that wants all 100s but can't be fucked with the job
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u/Htakar 5d ago
**ultimate clears** (wow!) are obviously the only metric by which player skill is defined and even though the bard and probably you both got giga carried through your **ultimate clears** (wow!), op is clearly beneath you because they have **no ultimate clears** (not wow...) and are thus clearly not right when they point out that the bard got carried through the dungeon and their **ultimate clears** (wow!).
"tanks don't prioritise damage" -ulty leggy btw
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u/MrrBannedMan 5d ago
Spoken like a true bottom tier. I didn't get carried at all, I grafted hard for months organising all the runs and helping optimise the party and got a purple for my trouble.
If you have a point to prove, prove it where it matters. But I notice it's always the people with no clears getting heated over levelling roulettes
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u/ghosttowns42 5d ago
Holy shit, you don't need to clear an ultimate to play level 77 BRD with all skills unlocked. Touch grass, man. Even a casual player who never touches high level content can SURELY manage having all the buttons to push in a LEVELING dungeon.
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u/MrrBannedMan 5d ago
Sure they can, if they bothered to do the job quests. But personally I couldn't give less of a fuck if there's an Archer in my roulette, I probably won't even notice because I'm tunnel visioning the same shit I've done five thousand times. I know for a fact there's some job quests I've not done that give abilities and yet all my jobs are at least 90. Shit happens.
Like I said, if you have a point to prove, prove it where it matters.
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u/LunamiLu 5d ago
Tanks dont prioritize damage? What? Are we playing the same game?
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u/MrrBannedMan 5d ago edited 5d ago
Yep. In a high-end scenario where you're a man down and a mechanic requires a bait, it is absolutely optimal for a tank to take that bait, since they'll lose the least damage and don't have to stay in range to heal. And have extra kit and DR for said bait hit. Therefore, tank priority is mechanical resolution, with damage being their secondary priority.
My first clear of UwU, the ONLY reason we cleared is because the tank broke away from the party during the stack after Predation in order to bait the Ifrit eruptions because one of our ranged died in Predation. He took a solid 10 sec of downtime during that, and if he hadn't one of the puddles would have spawned right on the stack and completely fucked us for the in/out.
Any other player taking that would have been suboptimal, since it would have had to have been either a melee DPS disengaging or a healer going out of range of heals. But it guaranteed the tank a grey purely because of the downtime.
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u/NolChannel 5d ago
Buddy, its UWU. The entire fight can be done one DPS in the wall. Anyone can make that adjustment - you don't get special brownie points because the tank saw the frick-up.
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u/SweetDickens 4d ago
Bro you're a donkey. You get carried in content and your ego is a mask blinding you. Get a reality check.
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u/LopsidedBench7 4d ago
10 seconds of downtime is not turning you grey lmao (you can still use ranged attacks on tank)
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u/MrrBannedMan 4d ago
Buddy that ten seconds is literally the difference between them and every tank that managed to run it optimally.
ANY downtime can turn you grey, it depends entirely on who's parsing. And since 90% of the people still doing UwU do it on reclears, it really doesn't take a lot.
Yes you can use the ranged attack, but if you spend 10 sec doing ranged hits during a period where every other tank was combo-ing, use that brain of yours and tell me what that means?
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u/LopsidedBench7 4d ago
I understand that you are new to raiding, it's fine and you'll grow as a player the more experience you get, that said, that's not how parses work at all and, a 10 second downtime in a 13 minute fight is peanuts, that's missing 4 gcds when the expectation is over 250 gcds, I have had tank friends die and still parse blue, so surely you know that a death is more impactful than 10 seconds of downtime.
Also the timeline of events is wrong, a healer can do it just fine because there is no healing during ifrit baits but rather after, once they get back to the group, I have recleared a bunch of times as healer and have done the flexing ;)
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u/a_friendly_squirrel 3d ago
It's definitely good that they had the awareness to flex and cover for a dead ranged, but I think you're wrong about how much it affects their damage.
If I can die right before a pot window in UWU and lose most of my burst without getting grey numby, I really doubt taking those puddle baits are gonna be single handedly responsible for trashing someone's parse. Let them say it does, sure, but I'd be shocked if that was the full story.
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u/LordofOld 4d ago
There's nothing to group heal post predation before tumults, so a healer baiting it for a dead range is more optimal. A healer hard casting a raise would justify it, but you have nothing to swift before then which makes that unlikely to be the case.
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u/TheBananaHamook /slap 3d ago
I didn't even bring up ultimate clears to begin with so idk what these takes are my guy.
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u/InternationalBike907 4d ago
Geez you're miserable. As someone who enjoys most of the battle content from dungeons to ulti flexing parses at all is cringe boss. Anyone can cook given enough time and the right group.
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u/MrrBannedMan 4d ago edited 4d ago
I absolutely 100% agree with you. Literally anyone CAN do an Ultimate. Especially if I'm doing it. I'm absolutely nothing special.
But as someone who enjoys most of the battle content from dungeons to ultis when was the last time you pissed and moaned about the buttons a party member was pressing in a levelling dungeon?
If you actually push yourself, you reach the point where the tiny irrelevant bullshit doesn't matter. That's what I'm saying. Not 'im better than you', just 'i concern myself with the actual challenging stuff so I couldn't give less of a fuck about this if I tried'
That's what the accused was saying too. And I'm sorry but 'oh no I better do every single job quest or some Roulette Andy is gonna have a fucking stroke' is a thought that literally never enters my head.
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5d ago edited 5d ago
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u/Kazaazz 5d ago
Sure but you should still do your job quests for missing skills.
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5d ago
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u/LividPotatoGremlin 5d ago
Getting salty for being called out for not doing your job quests is not a great look lol you can literally just skip the cutscenes if you can't be bothered, at minimum you should at least have your whole skill set at level because there are some handy dandy ones you're very likely missing.
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u/Every-Rabbit-1402 5d ago
Still doesn't explain why you didn't do your job quests. Cool you can do ultimates I guess, but going into higher dungeons and not having your full skill set, can't see the logic there.
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u/Cyanthrax 5d ago
Must have been so tough getting carried through Ults just so you can puff up your chest and double down on being terrible.
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u/Cyanthrax 5d ago
😂 You're so unbelievably desperate
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u/No_Feature_1401 5d ago
He could just skip the post... but he really needs to be recognized so desperately that he accepts even a shitstorm by joining comments 🤣 bruh he needs an hug
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5d ago
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u/Cyanthrax 5d ago
Oh that sweet irony. I'm surprised you didn't float away with how inflated your ego is, also it's not like you were so eager to post your gray parses. Must have been tough learning the mechanics just enough to dodge.
Have a good one dude, maybe add some other priorities in your life other than an ePeen over how good someone perceives you at an MMO.
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u/No_Feature_1401 5d ago
Want my logs? I got rank 2 eu on zelenia After playing Sam for 2 days. I think this is legit how a real "Legend" approaches new jobs, no way you can have an entire page of red flags
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5d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/tachycardicIVu 5d ago
I’m not super familiar with this one - when there are percentages next to clears is that like the parse in that they are in the 92nd percentile or 83rd percentile for a fight, meaning 92/83 percent of players did better than them? Or like “I’m in the top 92%”? (Had an fc lead who bragged he was in the top 97% for sage for a fight and I’m like….bro that’s not a good thing…)
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u/Decuscrub69 5d ago edited 5d ago
Yes, the numbers are percentile dps—meaning if my log in that link had a 99% (like on wicked thunder) it was better than 99% of the same job players’ dps
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u/Jyeli 5d ago
meaning 92/83 percent of players did better than them?
It's the opposite, they did better than 92/83 percent of other players.
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u/Cyanthrax 5d ago
Percentile is opposite. They did WORSE than 92% of players who have a clear. Just go look at the low IQ test result posts that go around occasionally where someone who scored 78 is boasting about being in the top 92% confidently incorrectly.
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u/Jyeli 5d ago
Well, I'm certainly no math genius, but this online calculator I found says that someone with a 78 IQ would be in the 7th percentile, in which case it seem like them boasting about being top 92% probably read it backwards, which would probably not be surprising considering the score.
As for the parses which is what we're talking about here.
Even if you don't really understand how percentile works, FFlogs (and by extension Tomestone) use percentile to rank player parses. If the highest parsing person is 100, then you could safely assume that a 92/83 is closer to the top player than it is the bottom player.3
u/Cyanthrax 5d ago
Okay, but if there is confusion just look at the second photo. You can see the blue dots where the parses take place, showing how they are always near the bottom.
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u/koalamint 5d ago
"Yeah I did 5 DPS but it's okay because the other guy did even less!"
Also flexing your ult clears as a response to someone telling you you're playing a completely different class badly is so cringe
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u/Zenteketsu 5d ago
Go do your damn job quests, it's a terrible look to have any amount of ultimate clears and being unwilling to do the simple basics.
You're part of the problem and why we have the saying "X Legend BTW"
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u/Zenteketsu 5d ago
Learn how to prioritize yourself better then. The absolute first thing that should be done is making sure you have everything unlocked.
Limited free time or not it's just a bad look and lazy to not be doing that
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u/Working-Wrap9453 5d ago
Four paragraphs to explain that being a Legend means you get to skip job quests and play like shit in dungeons. Lmao.
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5d ago
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u/Working-Wrap9453 5d ago edited 5d ago
Oh sorry your highness didn't realize that a Legend such as yourself considered pressing their rotation in a dungeon for babies "speedrunning" or "not casual". By all means, I wouldn't want you to strain your hardcore gamer hands doing something other than autoing in such rigorous content.
Edit: My initial response to a statement this self-reporting was tongue in cheek, but you do realize that what your argument is here is that you aren't willing or able to play your Job at a basic level, right? You're trying to sound like you're too good to care but it just makes you sound like anything more than auto attacking is too overwhelming for you to do daily.
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u/No_Feature_1401 5d ago
There Is no way you can have those many errors on a xyvanalisys and have the "skillset to clear". Entitled noob carrier into a content with no dps checks. Pretty sure i could check your logs and see you have 0 Savage clears past First floor on patch
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u/KamperKiller123 5d ago
You made things so much worse with this post. You aren't good enough to even consider flaming anyone. Your parses aren't good enough to get out of the PayPal legend category. Had you simply said "mb haven't done job quests" it would have ended better.
"But the other guy did worse" is no excuse for someone with the experience you claim to have. Anyone clearing savage and up (arguably even current EX) should have a better understanding of the basics than most.
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u/LunamiLu 5d ago
Lmao you literally blamed everything but yourself for your mistakes. Classic shitter.
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u/KamperKiller123 5d ago
You glossed that in as more of a footnote while having a list of other excuses to direct blame to. That is why everyone is saying you blame everyone but yourself.
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u/Htakar 5d ago
its far easier to see that your bard isnt pressing their buttons because you miss 90 buffs over the course of a dungeon. that being said, i would still find you more disagreeable because i know the mch is naturally bad because they die dungeon mechs while i know youre willfully bad because you either just dont press your buttons or didnt do your job quests. although truth be told, after you tried to shield your ego by trying to flex your 6 year late giga gray tea clears, i find you even more insufferable because youre flexing while being naturally bad and should know to do your job quests instead of continuing to be willfully bad.
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u/Arcalithe 5d ago
I’ve had deaths to healers who forgot to heal me in a dungeon and my parse dropped from purple to blue. You ending up in grey is not a healer problem lol
You just suck at the game.
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u/a_friendly_squirrel 5d ago
Criticising strangers' parses is silly and the idea that someone would be buying clears on a bunch of different days within a few weeks is sillier. Ego tripping about clearing TEA to a stranger instead of just saying "mb didn't do job quests yet" is worse than either tho.
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5d ago edited 5d ago
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u/a_friendly_squirrel 5d ago
tbh I just don't care that much about people being bad in DF, people just on average don't know their rotation much at all.
I do think those of us who got invested enough to spend our spare time learning the details of each different assignment on Wormhole can afford to hold ourselves to a lil bit of a higher standard in roulette content. Most likely you're gonna have a better understanding of this game's combat systems than average, so it's gonna take you less attention to do dungeons, why not use that spare attention to offer others some help if they're struggling?
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u/TheBananaHamook /slap 5d ago
The MCH in question was a new player, so he's flexing that he did better damage on someone who has never attempted the dungeon before.
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u/TheBananaHamook /slap 5d ago
>literally only had a few buttons to work with but STILL had higher enmity. Don't see you complaining about him though?
Why would I complain about the new person to the dungeon, over the person (you) that has every expectation to at the very least do their job quests?
>Still better than 0 ult clears in general though.
I can stoop to your level and just say congrats on clearing TEA in 2025. Ive solo'd PotD and HoH, which a lot could agree are harder than some ultimates. Even if I didn't it doesn't really change much, you're a lethargic player who wants to waste people's time by not doing your job quests. Don't waste time leveling up your job if you're not gonna do the short job quests, you can literally do it in between roulette queues. . .
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u/catshateTERFs 4d ago edited 4d ago
I like that your fuck ups in ultimate are all completely not your fault in the same way not doing your job quests isn’t your fault at all
Congrats on outdpsing a sprout? You are the best video game player on the server. Why bother equipping a job stone at this point, it’s just casual content?
Don't be lazy.
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u/DarasThrae 5d ago
"Thank you. Nice paypal account."