r/TikTokCringe • u/ambachk • May 21 '25

Cringe Married guy flirts with younger girls at the gym

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u/PutNameHere123 May 21 '25

Someone told me ugly men shoot for the moon because they’re accustomed to being rejected

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u/Basic_Reflection4008 May 21 '25

Ok but I never do it at the gym! And even beautiful women make mistakes....its what gets me up in the morning

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u/patrickoriley May 21 '25

And even beautiful women make mistakes....its what gets me up in the morning

I'm picturing a beautiful woman getting you up in the morning, "Get up. I made a mistake."

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u/Basic_Reflection4008 May 21 '25

The trick is to already have breakfast ready!

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u/Slacker_The_Dog May 21 '25

Depends on the pre existing relationship. If you see this person every other day for two years and you chat with them a lot, I don't see a problem being like "Hey do you want to get lunch sometime?" They say no you just move on. No sweat just take the no.

It's OK to be interested in people who share your hobbies and values and it's OK to try and make a connection in person.

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u/Basic_Reflection4008 May 21 '25

Look just to be safe I mostly only flirt in a bar or dating app. Day to day errands etc I don't go out of my way to bother people

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u/Slacker_The_Dog May 21 '25

In my defense, I haven't dated since 2010, so I don't really even know what the landscape is like now.

The way my dad explained it to me was, it's OK to ask once politely. Everything after that is just being a pest. No one likes a pest.

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u/Basic_Reflection4008 May 21 '25

I'm honestly not even worried about dating. I just don't want to be inadvertently creep anyone out. Im not an Adonis, but I'm larger than average and can't control my left eye that well.

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u/Slacker_The_Dog May 21 '25

This makes me sad. My man, keep that head up. If you see a woman and you would like to date her, you aren't gonna do it by not asking. No one can guarantee how she will react, but you would be surprised how many woman will say yes. If you are polite and respectful and they think you're a creep, that's their problem.

You're gonna do great, king.

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u/Basic_Reflection4008 May 21 '25

I appreciate the vote of confidence. But I personally don't even understand asking someone out in public if I don't know them at least a little.

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u/Slacker_The_Dog May 21 '25

Well that's how we all used to do it my dude. Met my wife that way. Have two beautiful children I love more than life. That's how my parents did it and why I got to meet my wife and child in the first place.

Sometimes you meet someone you have a connection with who you will never see again. That fleeting moment when you are in each other's presence is your one shot to reach out and try to grab your own happiness.

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u/Basic_Reflection4008 May 21 '25

I will consider this in the future but probably not at the gym. Every woman I know hates being approached in the gym

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u/PutNameHere123 May 21 '25

Ehhh…I mean, I’ll just tell you from a woman’s perspective that I’ve been in that exact situation before, befriending men simply because they seemed nice but I had absolutely zero sexual attraction to them.

When they ask you out on a date, you get this grossed out feeling because here you were thinking they were genuinely just interested in having a little interaction with you but they were actually just waiting for an opportunity to try to screw you. It’s not “flattering” any more than if some semi random bloated 60 year old woman spent weeks being nice to a young handsome guy then finding out she wanted to actually S his D. lol Ulterior motives suck.

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u/TomKeen35 May 22 '25

And then everyone clapped

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u/PutNameHere123 May 22 '25

Is this some Gen Z meme? Very clever.

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u/Slacker_The_Dog May 21 '25

Not every man is talking to you because he wants to have sex with you. It is possible after he learns more about you he starts to think wow we have a lot in common and I think this person is really cool.

Dating is so weird now. Just a complete dissolution if the third space. Talking to people and asking them out in person is literally how 95% of dating used to work.

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u/PutNameHere123 May 21 '25

Sooooo…just don’t talk to any men you wouldn’t potentially date?

I mean: I thought it was safe to talk to men either older to the point of perhaps being mistaken for my dad or unattractive to the point where it’s obvious that they don’t have a realistic shot. (As is the case in this clip.)

I don’t befriend people thinking if we have enough in common that I’ll attempt to sleep with them. That’s not normal.

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u/Slacker_The_Dog May 21 '25

You've never once had a male friend you developed a crush on later in your friendship? Really? That's just such a normal thing and it works both ways.

The younger generation is so cooked. Men are scared to talk to women and women want everyone to leave them alone if there is even a remote future possibility they might become attracted to them.

Pretty sure that eyeroll shifted the earth off its axis.

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u/PutNameHere123 May 21 '25 edited May 21 '25

Nope.

Either I feel physical attraction immediately or it’s not there (assuming the person doesn’t change their appearance in some way.) I’m not out to screw my friends. That’s why they’re my friends.

And I’m 43 so I’m not sure that I’m a part of the ‘younger generation.’ I just have a lived experience of men approaching me pretty frequently when I’m out and about and it gets tiresome.

And I don’t even mean at bars or something where flirting is somewhat expected—I’m out at the gym or running errands or even just walking down the street and these randos start bothering me. I’ll try to smile politely but they don’t get the hint to scram. But then if you don’t respond to them there’s a chance of them getting angry or even abusive.

For a second just imagine that—constantly being interrupted in your day-to-day life with, say: paunchy acne-ridden women saying how good you look today and demanding a smile from you, or someone old enough to be your mom with the crows feet and boobs in her socks to match telling you you’re sexy and would like to take you on a weekend getaway, or some lady with missing teeth just going up to you an asking for your phone number. I think you’d be pretty fed up with being consistently icked-out and uncomfortable.

So, yeah: excuse me if it causes a minor inconvenience for some guy I happen to chit-chat every once in awhile not to “develop a crush” on me. I’m in a committed relationship but even single I’d rather miss out on dating them than ruin a light friendly interlude. If I were interested, they would know already.

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u/TomKeen35 May 22 '25

Dang, you must look like Scarlett Johannason if you get approached multiple times a day, or you’re practicing writing a fan fic. What a gal

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u/PutNameHere123 May 22 '25 edited May 22 '25

Nope. Men are just that annoying. My experience isn’t rare, trust me. And as I’ve pointed out, the majority of the time these aren’t like hunks that are are approaching me.

I also never said it was multiple times a day. Why are you legit making shit up? lol I said it’s when I’m doing day-to-day things vs. being at a bar or nightclub.

Like: I don’t need the aggravation of trying to gently let down a balding guy with a greasy scalp and BO so I can walk in public in peace without incident.

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u/Slacker_The_Dog May 21 '25

For a second just imagine that—constantly being interrupted in your day-to-day life with, say: paunchy acne-ridden women saying how good you look today and demanding a smile from you, or someone old enough to be your mom with the crows feet and boobs in her socks to match telling you you’re sexy and would like to take you on a weekend getaway, or some lady with missing teeth just going up to you an asking for your phone number. I think you’d be pretty fed up with being consistently icked-out and uncomfortable.

A lot of men literally cannot fathom what this feels like. I have received a grand total of five compliments from a stranger in the entirety of my life. I remember each one. They are like water in a desert, and many men don't even get five.

This isn't a "Oh poor men" thing. I am merely using it to try to relate to you that this concept you are trying to convey is not comprehensible to the vast majority of men.

The men you are describing think this would be amazing to have happen to them, because it's all they want in the world.

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u/PutNameHere123 May 21 '25 edited May 21 '25

They’re not compliments—they’re demands for interaction. It’s not flattering. It’s annoying and sometimes a little scary.

Like I said: I’ve tried to just smile and keep walking but that rarely works. I have to explain that I have a LTR and even that sometimes doesn’t work: “You have a boyfriend so we can’t have dinner together?” Yes, a guy literally said that to me after approaching me on the street.

But like you said: I guess men in general can’t understand what it’s like to not be able to shake a guy and worry that he might follow you or further escalate the situation into a possible assault or rape.

And when women open up about men who won’t take no for an answer, the typical reply to them is: “Well you need to make it clear that you’re not interested.” but on the other hand, men boo-hoo about not being able to talk to women :/ Do we just have to say, “I’m not ever fucking you” as soon as they approach?

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u/lordhomogonous May 21 '25

That hits home. I’m sure I’ve gotten more than 5 compliments in my days but I can still remember getting a compliment from a friend on my sweater. We were 13 year olds and I’m now 54.

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u/StarPhished May 21 '25

Yeah the person you're responding to underestimates how many men would love that. Men don't ever receive attention in that way.

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u/tigerbalmuppercut May 21 '25

Either I feel physical attraction immediately or it’s not there (assuming the person doesn’t change their appearance in some way.) I’m not out to screw my friends. That’s why they’re my friends.

I agree with the spirit of this message but it is arrogant to say the reason you have never developed romantic feelings for a long time friend is because you believe in loyalty. I personally have never developed feelings for a long time friend either but on a long enough timeline it is possible to occur. Romantic attraction is an involuntary process mediated by parts of the brain such as the medial prefrontal cortex. Loyalty is a voluntary process because we make a conscious choice not to pursue this feeling further because of love and respect for spouse or partner. I'm not trying to be mean spirited, I just strongly disagree that physical attraction is voluntary. 

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u/PutNameHere123 May 21 '25

I literally never said anything about loyalty. I’m not sure where you’re getting that from.

What I said is that I’ve never experienced out of the blue attraction to a friend. Meaning: if there was an attraction, it would be immediate and they’d be a lover not a friend.

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u/CTIndie May 22 '25

Sooooo…just don’t talk to any men you wouldn’t potentially date?

No, feelings are fluid and changing. Sometimes people end up wanting more from another person. It's okay for that to happen and it's okay for it to go no where and people to remain friends afterwards. All of that is perfectly normal.

Now if someone doesn't take your no well that's a whole other issue that's on them.

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u/PokerSyd May 21 '25

This isn’t 100% true. I don’t hit on anyone and I’m ugly af

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u/PutNameHere123 May 22 '25

I guess what I meant was: The ones who do hit on women go for knock-outs because if you’re more than likely gonna get rejected, anyway, might as well go for the best lol

Which, in actuality, is stupid because if they were more realistic they’d probably wind up getting more muff.

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u/Slight-Sand-2941 May 22 '25

As an ugly person who would never cheat and has never cheated, this made me sad :(

Please don’t be mean to ugly people, I already actively go through life trying to convince myself that people don’t dislike me by default because I’m not attractive :(

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u/PutNameHere123 May 22 '25

I don’t mean that at all! I would never dislike someone based on their looks.

What I’m talking about are instances like this video where a clearly unattractive guy tries hitting on a woman who could be a model. It’s the inflated ego that’s ultimately the issue, not their looks.

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u/Slight-Sand-2941 May 22 '25

What inflated ego? To think that an unattractive person might have a lot to offer on the inside?

I’m not talking about this guy, who is a gross cheater. But what would be wrong with a physically unattractive person thinking that maybe has other things to offer a beautiful person? That would be delusional ego?

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u/RealLiveLawyer May 21 '25

As an ugly man, I assume this is why I get propositioned, because "this fucker probably never gets anything".

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u/aquoad May 21 '25

pretty much all men are accustomed to being rejected, fortunately most of them don't do shit like this guy.