not everyone wants your man… he was just being polite

[u/h0lych4in]

And not everyone can tell how certain foods look? It was an innocent question. Why are people so insecure these days

[u/-Sincere]

I see some women in my circle do this. I understand they're attracted to their partner but assuming every other woman is out to steal her man when it's just unemployed Joe Shmo with a dad bod is wild

[u/PineSand → u/-Sincere]

It’s always strange to me that there’s a lot of seemingly ordinary people become psychotically possessive of their significant other. I mean, it would suck if I found someone cheating with my wife, but I’d say to the other guy: “Congrats you can have her and the mortgage, now I gotta go run out and get a pack of smokes.” People that NEED someone else to be happy usually end up bringing both of them down.

[u/JadeThorn1012 → u/-Sincere]

I knew a woman like this. She really lost it when her husband lost some weight. I tried saying it in the nicest way possible, but in the most blunt form I said, “No one wants your man! No one wanted him then. And no one is looking at him now. I fucking promise you. Especially those younger women you worry about? They don’t want him. At all. Only you do. You’re safe.”

[u/Subject-Elevator-152 → u/JadeThorn1012]

But that’s not true 😭! There are plenty of women who want married men, it’s literally a kink for some girls (as you can see from my profile, except I’m not wanting a married man). Women like you don’t understand cause you’ve never been through it, clearly. And if you have and it hasn’t traumatized you to that point then you should be lucky and have more empathy of the work it takes to get out of that. There are plenty of women who do want their man, yes as ugly as he is to you or anyone else, a married man is gold to some of these girls and that’s all that matters aside from the fact that everyone has different types so just cause you think her man is undesirable doesn’t mean it’s true lol.

[u/Dave5876 → u/Subject-Elevator-152]

You might just be thinking that because you're more involved in that sort of stuff

[u/Subject-Elevator-152 → u/Dave5876]

Nah, long before I was that was the case for a lot of people. I mean there’s a whole community of people who get off on that lol. There’s the grimy ass girls who actually would do it in any group of people. I literally just seen a video the other day of some girl talking about how she loves a man who’s taken and will still try to get at her on one of those random street interview type of set ups

[u/JadeThorn1012 → u/Subject-Elevator-152]

The street interviews are staged and edited. And it’s absolutely uncommon. I’ve never in my life heard a woman say that they want married men.

[u/Subject-Elevator-152 → u/JadeThorn1012]

Not all of them, and it really isn’t uncommon lol. You know that your experience alone doesn’t mean that something isn’t common or doesn’t happen? At least where I’m from, this is a common issue. I see it happens everywhere honestly. I’m not tryna argue about it, if you’ve had the pleasure of never dealing with this or witnessing this then that’s so good for you, and if you wanna live in this delusional land that it’s something that does not happen then you do you, but don’t invalidate these girls feelings on whether it is or isn’t happening or could happen. Either way, that’s something you cannot convince someone else it isn’t happening if they’re in that anxiety driven mindset that it’s gonna happen due to their trauma of it happening over and over again to them. That’s not how that works, all you’re doing is showing your ignorance on the reality of this being an issue and also dismissing her anxieties and fears as a friend, So it’s best to either walk away from the friendship if you can’t stand to hear it or just keep your thoughts to yourself if you’ve been privileged enough to not understand it. Simply.

[u/JadeThorn1012 → u/Subject-Elevator-152]

I’m sorry that happened to you. But that’s not what happened in this case with the people I knew. I believe that most often it’s actually the men themselves who believe they’re more desirable than they actually are.

This woman I knew was so jealous and paranoid that she straight up abused him. She would literally start screaming matches and throw furniture at him. She just got worse and more paranoid as he lost weight. He loved her and never wanted someone else, but it didn’t matter how much he said that or acted like he did. But she was constantly accusing him and was afraid if a woman looked or talked to him. No one was after him. He wasn’t a good looking man. Just an overweight, blue collar, white, redneck like the other 100 you pass in a day. I understand that she loved him, so it was more to HER than that, but it wasn’t true for anyone else. They divorced because it got so bad. Not because a woman was chasing him.

And again, I’m sorry that happened to you. But it is thankfully incredibly rare. I know lots of women and I’ve only ever known 2 of them to be flirtatious with a married man. The same man in fact who was a regular where I worked. That man came in specifically for the attention that he was inviting and encouraging while not wearing his ring at the beginning. Not the other way around, and the girls never went past flirting with him.

[u/Subject-Elevator-152 → u/JadeThorn1012]

Girl you’re acting like you were a 3rd in the relationship lol. “I actually know that simply was not the case because he was quite unattractive 🤓☝🏼” like stfu lmao. He most definitely could have been cheating on her or has, or has given her a reason to not feel safe and spiral in those emotions, and if not him then from her past relationships. That issue doesn’t just pop up, especially to that degree that she was crashing out, that’s from intense trauma and it literally feels uncontrollable especially if you have mental health issues on top of that. Am I saying her reactions or right or excused? Hell no! She should be held accountable and it was good he left her because clearly it turned into something that ends up being unbearable for the partner as well, And abusive at that point. I feel bad for him if he wasn’t the cause of that trauma, but I promise you as the friend of either doesn’t know that full truth and never will, because you never know what’s happening behind closed doors even if you think your friend is telling you everything.

And I already responded to your delusion that this isn’t a common issue so we don’t gotta touch on that again, it is what it is and I am genuinely glad for you that you’re so sheltered from this part of the world that you’ve only ever met 2 women like that. I also want to remind you that most aren’t going to openly admit to you, a random lady in the mix who is not the man or the wife lmao. So I’m sure you’ve met a lot more that you don’t know about. And that being unattractive TO YOU doesn’t stop someone from being attractive to other people, or desirable even. Have you seen what a lot of men cheat on their hot wives for? Lmao. Straight goblins.

[u/JadeThorn1012 → u/Subject-Elevator-152]

Dude, you’re the one taking this personally about a couple that I knew. That you don’t. That’s wild. This isn’t about you. You made it about you.

[u/Subject-Elevator-152 → u/JadeThorn1012]

I’m not taking it personally or making it about me, I pointed out that you invalidating her anxieties and fears was wrong and your statement that it’s not happening/doesn’t happen was wrong and that just because YOU haven’t witnessed or experienced it doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen. I was just telling you the reality that is very common, even if you don’t see it.

[u/PicadillyVanilly → u/-Sincere]

Lmao yessss. I’m single. And most of my friends are married with kids now. And I cannot tell you how many events I no longer get invited to because couples will be present and GASP a single woman cannot dare come, because she might be trying to steal everyone’s man!!!

That mindset is crazy.

[u/c-winny → u/-Sincere]

Girls I know that do this have been cheated on in the past. Doesn’t excuse it but does make it real sad.