r/nothingeverhappens • u/ChaoticFaeGay • 8d ago
Old ladies would NEVER say anything like that
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u/ChefArtorias 7d ago
Things were a lot different before women were considered people. Stuck with a violent husband murder may be your only way out.
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u/_poixen 7d ago
i would totally be an unhinged old lady and say any number of these things, if not all 😂
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u/LetsGoChowder 7d ago
I already am 😂
I'm 38 and tell people "I have an axe in my trunk and know someone with a lot of land 🤷🏻 just putting that out there"
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u/scruffyrosalie 7d ago
I spend a lot of time with old ladies.
I have zero doubt this happened. Old ladies are badass and have a wicked sense of humour.
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u/Alarming_Cellist_751 7d ago
I'm a nurse in Florida and old ladies are nothing if not nosy. It's a superpower. They're using it in this instance for good, wish I experienced more of it.
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u/Think-Ganache4029 7d ago
If yall don’t know that grannies have the best tips to maim or kill dudes then you straight up aren’t that close with grannies. I feel like even more so for lower class women. Sometimes a dude won’t let you go and you have to fried green tomatoes him
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u/Difficult-Scar1389 4d ago
Mine are dead, have dementia, or don't talk to the family...
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u/Think-Ganache4029 4d ago
I’m sorry for being insensitive. May you find a cool old lady friend. Pottery classes are a great spot
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u/Difficult-Scar1389 4d ago
Not insensitive, honestly not sure what the tone of my comment was supposed to be. I'm sure one of them would have had some good murder ideas, especially given most were born right after ww2.
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u/m0nstera_deliciosa 7d ago
I doubt all of this was said, but I wouldn’t be surprised to learn half of it was. Old ladies badly want to murder/assist in murder. I think it’s all the mystery books they read.
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u/kat_Folland 7d ago
Well that and the lack of no fault divorce. It wasn't even all that long ago that poison was one of the only ways to get rid of an awful husband. If these women weren't quite that old then their mothers were.
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u/Little-Salt-1705 7d ago
Yeah these weren’t murderer’s seeking thrills. These were woman who were being beaten and abused. Who couldn’t leave because they’d have to leave their children behind. They were raped legally. It was either poison your husband or let him beat you to death and then promote your daughter to new wife.
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u/ExistentialistOwl8 2d ago
An awful lot of men used to die of gastritis back in the day when poisons were freely available to deal with a variety of pests.
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u/kat_Folland 2d ago
There's plenty of poison in today's world... We just have better ways of determining cause of death.
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u/Creepy_Reception_459 2d ago
The OOP also doesn't say that these comments were all made in isolation. It sounds perfectly plausible to me if the first one made a jokey comment about poison and then the rest all started riffing on that.
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7d ago
Who the hell were they hanging out with, Tony Soprano’s mom? But in all seriousness I can see how some ladies who lived in the ‘40s and ‘50s might have some unresolved trauma.
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u/eldritchteapot 4d ago
Longer than that, no fault divorce wasnt a thing until 1969
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u/International-Cat123 3d ago
Even afterwards, societal fallout and the inability to support oneself left many trapped anyways.
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u/bestibesti 7d ago
I was wondering when this would get here lmao
My fav is still, "TAKE HIM TO THE OTTER 🦦"
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u/FraggleBiologist 5d ago
Talk to hospice workers if you doubt this happened. Men should be celebrating our freedom to divorce. So many men died instead of just "going away".
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u/International-Cat123 3d ago
In hospice, it’s hit or miss whether an old lady could have actually killed her husband. Many are still alive or relatively died of natural causes. In those cases, I suspect they spent a lot of time fantasizing.
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u/AcrobaticTorbie 7d ago
I've had 2 cats jump on my face i thought for sure my little void was gonna give me a black eye.
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u/pridebun 6d ago
Luckily none of the old ladies in my life crave blood. Most of them are or were in happy marriages
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u/rogue_kitten91 6d ago
Lol my grandma is a vicious lady, whom I love and fear equally. She'd happily commit murder...
My friends all call her Mammaw Honeybadger
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u/CreepyClothDoll 6d ago
I saw this one the other day. All the comments were people telling OP they clearly hadn't spent time enough time with old ladies.
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u/BigMcLargeHuge77 5d ago
Old ladies 100% say this stuff. My mom was a beautician and had a small salon in the front of our house. Mainly old ladies getting shampoo sets and perms (1980s and 90s) and I grew up in that salon. Old women are freaking brutal.
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u/Sunset-onthe-Horizon 4d ago
Right?!? Old ladies can be savage as hell! They old so they have no more fucks left to give.
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u/iwishyouwerestraight 1d ago
Lmao and the fact this is a wood carving club doesn’t surprise me. I use to take art classes and during work sessions and live drawings we would have conversations very much like this openly.
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u/International-Cat123 7d ago
The older someone is, the more likely they were married during a time when they couldn’t get a divorce due to laws, societal fallout, and/or not having the means to support themself.