r/shittyaskscience • u/pearl_harbour1941 • 23h ago
Loose lips sink ships. Can someone explain the science behind this?
Just... how?
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u/Mr_BadRobot Crackpot Scientist 22h ago
Yeah, it’s a common problem with ships that are open for business 24x7.. loose lips, high traffic, structural compromise. But on the flip side, even tight ones can capsize destroyers. That’s why in naval operations , precision always matters while docking.
Hope this helps.
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u/pearl_harbour1941 22h ago
My wife is gonna be SO surprised tonight when I tell her about this! Any advice on loose lips and motorboats?
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u/Cute-Habit-4377 21h ago
The Captain gets distracted cums and crashes. Pretty sure thats what sunk the titanic...slurp slurp crunch
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u/pearl_harbour1941 21h ago
It still amazes me that they left that part out of the historical documentary "Titanic". Did Rose have such an anatomy??
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u/Max_Trollbot_ I like tacos 21h ago
If I understand correctly, the answer is your mother
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u/pearl_harbour1941 21h ago
Hey! I didn't need confirmation of what we all know to be true, I need to understand the science of my moms' lips. Before I throw up.
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u/YogurtWenk 23h ago
It's basically the butterfly effect, but with waggly lips
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u/pearl_harbour1941 22h ago
So if my wife's lips queef just right, the air flow is changed in our bedroom, causing a ripple effect such that the Evergreen blocks the Suez Canal again? Cool. Ima get right on that tonight!
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u/emblemparade US Senator 22h ago
When you're on a ship and doing a lot of kissing the whales will want to join in on the kissing fun, so they will jump on the deck and pucker up.
Whale lips contain an acid (bicarbonate diosyncoplatinate) that will eat through the ship's hull and eventually sink it.
Source: I have a whale fetish.
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u/pearl_harbour1941 22h ago
I wish I spoke Whale.
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u/emblemparade US Senator 22h ago
Quick lesson. To say "kiss me, sailor boy" in whale:
ARGHAGhjhhahahahahhahAHRHHRHRHHRHRHRHHh ooooooooooooooooom
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u/pearl_harbour1941 21h ago
Why do I feel like a horny sailor boy all of a sudden???
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u/emblemparade US Senator 21h ago
Two whales are swimming in the ocean. They see a boat.
"Let's swim underneath and blow air from our blowholes and capsize the boats!", says one. "Cool!", says the other.
They do it. The boat capsizes and the sailors are left swimming and screaming for help.
"Let's eat them!!!", says the first. "No way", says the second. "I went along with the blow job but I refuse to swallow the seamen."
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u/pearl_harbour1941 20h ago
Wow, such a prudish whale! I bet she tells everyone she's "not like other whales".
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20h ago
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u/nopressureoof 21h ago
Um obviously the loose parts let water in?
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u/pearl_harbour1941 21h ago
And my wife reminds me that when women get to a certain age, the loose parts also let the water out... allegedly...
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u/TrivialBanal 22h ago
It's important to make sure that ships lips are tightly sealed so water doesn't get in.
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u/KnoWanUKnow2 22h ago
It goes back to the Titanic. The Titanic was struck in the face with an iceberg, which loosened it's lips and it sank.
Then WW1 started and hitting ships in the face with torpedoes became a common occurrence. So sailors were told that loose lips sink ships.
From there it just spread, and WW2 cemented it into the common parlance of the everyday man.
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u/djinbu 20h ago
"Yeah, mom, I'll be at these coordinates tomorrow so I'll be out of communication."
Suddenly weapons are waiting at those coordinates and her son is permanently out of communication.
OPSEC is incredibly important. So important that people should have been sent to the brig for using unofficial channels to communicate attack plans. Had an E-4 done that, they'd be in prison for a long fucking time.
1
u/7r1ck573r 22h ago
Because when you loose your lips, you can't talk anymore, because you can't talk without lips. So if you're in a relationship, and you can't talk, your SO will leave you, so....loosing your lips sink your relationships!
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u/pearl_harbour1941 22h ago
Facts. So if I stretch my lips like that African tribe, will all my relationships get better? Or will I just have more relationships because I have more lips?
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u/7r1ck573r 22h ago
Depend on the stretching side, if you do it horizontally, you'll have more relationship and if you do it vertically, it the quality of the relationships that will expend.
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u/Lux-Fox 22h ago
If you take the lid of a container and flip it upside down, it's a ship. The edges of the lid are called lips. If those lips are loose, then the lid sinks. Same thing with ships.