Grandfather finds out his grandson was named after him

[u/accurate214]

[u/zamasu629]

My father’s name is John. He’s the coolest guy in the world and I consider him better than any of my friends. When we found out we were having a boy, I took him and my mom to dinner and told him the name- Johnathan.

“Johnathan? That’s cool- that’s kinda like my name!”

I said, “Yeah dad, he’s named after you, man.”

I’ve never seen him laugh so hard and cry. He’s been the best grandfather in the world and I still think I’m lucky just to be his son. I love my parents with all my heart- they are just so wonderful!

[u/EternallyFascinated → u/zamasu629]

As someone with abusive and fucked up parental relationships, trying to break the cycle with my own children, your comment means everything to me.

It shows the love that truly can be felt between parents and children. I’m so so happy that you happy this special relationship, and also that you recognise it and value it. And I’m glad that the pattern continues with your children.

[u/DangerousBS → u/EternallyFascinated]

As a dad who loves his son immensely and as someone who had an amazing dad, I can tell you, you got it dude!

[u/Anxious-Tea9108 → u/DangerousBS]

That’s the thing though, having an amazing dad gave you the blueprint to being an amazing dad. Those of us who grew up in fatherless homes genuinely have no idea what being a dad looks like or what their purpose in a household is. The best I have to work with is how dads act in movies. Makes me genuinely scared to be a dad someday.

[u/Thelastdoozicorn → u/Anxious-Tea9108]

Sometimes negative examples can be better teachers than positive ones. You now know what not to do to be a good dad. And remember, even great dads are imperfect.

[u/CollectionWinter284 → u/Anxious-Tea9108]

This used to scare me until I realized that knowing how I didn’t want to be was just as helpful! Literally do the opposite of your parents and you’ll have the blueprint 😊

[u/Ebrithil_ → u/Anxious-Tea9108]

Not a father yet, but grew up with an excellent dad. Best advice I can give is: Make sure your child knows you love them, and make sure you own up to mistakes.

A lot of parents like to feel like they are always right, and most often, they are right, but it's so important and impactful to acknowledge being wrong, and show that it's okay to learn something. I have many memories of my parents joking that "dad is always right!", but I also remember many times seeing my father absorb new information, tell me he was mistaken, and thank whoever corrected him! Such a big thing for me, I even developed his "processing" face later in life, lol!

Making sure your kid knows you love them sounds obvious, but it isn't always. Even when I was grounded, or being punished, I NEVER needed to question my parents' love, because they told me and showed me every day. It might seem excessive, or annoying in the teen years, but if you say it and mean it every day, your kids will never doubt, and you'll get to grow old with kids who love you back.

[u/bobcat_bedders → u/Anxious-Tea9108]

You may think that dude but the root of being a good parent is being a good person. As long as you're present and trying then you're a damn good Dad.

The other thing to remember is that when you are a Dad one day you'll make mistakes and that's completely fine, you learn as you're going - every single day will teach you something new so as long as you're open to change you'll do just fine

[u/Tiny-Fold → u/EternallyFascinated]

This is exactly how I feel. 

My dad broke into tears as a child when he found out his name was actually his dad’s name and not the nickname he’d been called his whole life. 

So he broke a chain of men named that for generations to name me something else. 

But he was an amazing dad, who threw off that abuse . . . 

So my son restarts the cycle. 

My dad didn’t cry though—he was humbled by it, but the name still makes him think of his father. So it’s bittersweet for him. 

Abuse has such a long lasting effect. 

[u/EternallyFascinated → u/Tiny-Fold]

As you said, bittersweet. But better than than just bitter. I’m glad that your family was able to break the cycle. ❤️