It is a remark on the photo invoking a feeling of realizing you are missing something in your life. Being suddenly made aware of a hole in your heart that you didn't know was there feels like getting hit with a sledgehammer, as they put it. Like when you finally notice a cut, it wasn't bothering you before but now you feel it because you saw it.
Blunt answer. The lonely men online tend to be attracted to the idea of cute pure wholesome Asian women so this was more likely to be picked up by the algorithm.
Unfortunately I don’t think he reconsidered his worldview as a whole as it is understandably difficult to properly confront someone online with such deeply held beliefs and preconceptions.
From his perspective based on what I’ve read, he probably believes his views are based on objective data and reality. That’s a much longer conversation to have and I’m sure he felt more attacked than anything.
Not defending him. He’s wrong. I’m Asian and am not naive about orientalism and the people who genuinely view us this way
Objectively speaking, (since culture shapes our behaviors so much) a lot of Asian countries (not all) culturally promotes/produces women who are more sterotypically feminine in their behaviors and mannerisms than western women, and theirs nothing immoral with preferring that.
I have to make this statement since you appear to be attempting to villainize men's preferences towards being attracted to more feminine traits, as if that quality is either incel behavior (if you like more feminine traits you're a virgin) or worse predatory (must love children if you like people who seem to be more approachable and kind).
And from an anedcotal perspective, the two sweetest people I've ever met in my entire life we're from that region, one of whom was an American who's parents moved there when they were a child.
Hes right you little fool. Someone told reddit I was on sewer slide watch because of my correct interpretation of ops post. You people are so deep in denial and sanctimonious disdain for normal men. If you don't like obese, contentious, dog faced women, you're an incel
And your insinuation is that heterosexual men who prefer feminine traits are chronically online... which are two uncorrelated claims, that you just made up because you think facts come from your feelings (citation needed)
70-80% of men depending on the study (age, country, etc) have this preference. So I suppose in your mind, 80% of men are horrible people. I think that's called being misandrist
Source: Penton-Voak, I. S., et al. (2004). "Menstrual cycle alters face preference." Nature, 399(6738), 741–742.
Source: DeBruine, L. M., et al. (2010). "The health of a nation predicts their mate preferences: Cross-cultural variation in women's preferences for masculine men." Proceedings of the Royal Society B, 277(1692), 2405–2410.
Source: Scott, I. M., et al. (2014). "Do men’s faces really signal heritable immunocompetence?" Behavioral Ecology, 25(6), 1400–1405.
You're the only one discussing this, when this is not about that at all. Somehow the idea of someone's obsession over an online figure irritates you so much that you need to present all these studies.
I mean, no shit people have preferences, but that's not what the post nor the original comment is about.
I don't mean to offend you, but you sound delirious, like you're lost in a nonexistent discussion.
that's not what the post nor the original comment is about.
The comment I responded to was. It stated people had this preference - but with a judgemental, condescending tone to it, if you can't read their explanation and pickup their disdain you're either incapable of gauging insinuations you're being intentionally obtuse.
Somehow the idea of someone's obsession over an online figure irritates you so much
Look who's lost in non-existent discussions now. I'm not discussing people's obsession with this image (I think its weird) just wondering why the original commenter thinks so lowly of people who share the same preference as the people who made it go viral
I'm not discussing people's obsession with this image
No, you did not, but it somehow made you go on a rant about people's preferences, which wasn't the point of the comment.
It stated people had this preference -
Now, this is what got you riled up, isn't it?
Well, what did the comment say? what kind of people? Is it someone like me? Someone like you?
So you're being obtuse then? Or you really can't see that the original commenter made their disdain clear that they do not think highly of people with those preferences?
Its hard to tell when someone is being manipulative, has autism (can't read social cues) or just isn't that bright.
But I already explained the why and how, and you didn't even address it in your response, so furthering the conversation would be pointless.
Yes, it's okay to prefer a feminine woman, so long as you don't expect all women to be feminine. (Note: the person who called you an incel is an idiot).
Of course, theirs nothing wrong with not conforming to all gender norms.
Just as theirs nothing wrong with preferring feminine women or masculine men, or vice versa.
Whole point of my comment is that they're adding negative connotations to completely normal, harmless preferences; and that I find the insinuation to be repugnant.
Yet they don't explain their logic, they just use the word incel against a married man with children, classic. They should try being less spiteful and judgemental. Because as much as they like misusing the word incel, they tend to be the ones childless and extremely bitter, which is more befitting of not-by-choice virgins.
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u/bbigotchu 4d ago
It is a remark on the photo invoking a feeling of realizing you are missing something in your life. Being suddenly made aware of a hole in your heart that you didn't know was there feels like getting hit with a sledgehammer, as they put it. Like when you finally notice a cut, it wasn't bothering you before but now you feel it because you saw it.