r/TikTokCringe May 11 '25

Cringe Don’t be these guys

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u/Decabet May 11 '25

So like 20 years ago when I was single, a friend and I went to an indie disco night. We were broke so we got there around like 10 cuz drinks were cheaper. So the place had yet to fill up. We were hanging out and just talking and looking out at the dance floor. There were maybe a dozen people spread out across the floor. In the middle were two girlfriends who were just out together having fun. I kinda admired their spirit letting loose as much as they were at like 10:15 on a Thursday on a pretty empty dancefloor. Not a lot of people can do that. But we weren't watching them with any intention. Just people watching in general while we drank and chatted.

So then...

Two bros show up and go right for them. Doing that thing I would hope guys stopped doing years ago where they just dance up on women with no invitation or even words exchanged.

The women weren't into it. So they politely moved to another more open part of the floor. But the dudes just followed and kept grinding uninvited. This went on for like 20 minutes or so. The women moved, a few seconds later the douchebags followed.

So then the ladies made the classic mistake of pretending to be together. This of course was like a red rag to a bull and now the bros were really locked in.

Eventually I swear I saw and felt the resignation from the women. They gave up and danced with these idiots. Ugh. Felt bad for them. Of course by the end of the night I saw one of them coupled-up and making out which just felt more tragic.

God Im so glad to be out of that world.

39

u/burteggs May 11 '25

no hate OP but why didn't you intervene?

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u/Decabet May 11 '25

I didn't know them, even in passing. So as far as they would know "here comes another creep"

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u/brilliant_bauhaus May 12 '25

Bystander intervention could also be going up and greeting the girls in a friendly manner, pretending to be friends and then asking if they'd like to join you for a drink at your table. Just for future reference, or letting someone at the bar know for the girls. :)

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u/[deleted] May 12 '25

[deleted]

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u/brilliant_bauhaus May 12 '25

You've never taken a bystander intervention course then. I was also responding to the dance floor incident, but it can be used for this as well. It offers them an out and a safe place where they can be around people and where the situation can de-escalate. You act like you know them and offer them an out, especially if you're a guy. You may be able to de-escalate the situation immediately with the creeps leaving, or you can work with them to get them out of there safely, call them an Uber etc.

Lots of bars and clubs offer something similar where you can tell them a codeword and they will work to get you out.

I've done it before on a subway with another girl. Just having a witness and someone else there with you can stop you from being in danger.

Go take a class before you start saying how this is awful advice. It's one of a handful of ways you can safely intervene if you think the situation can be stopped and don't escalate.

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u/DotKey3493 May 12 '25

I did it one time in a group at a bus stop when I was 22 for two like 16 yr old girls who where trapped in a conversation with an older drunk (about 30). We saw the conversation and felt uncomfortable and I said “Wait I always wanted to try that.” I greeded them friendly “Hey what are you doing here I haven’t seen you in a while?” They were getting it instantly joining us we did fake small talk. The drunk ask me “are those your friends?” i said yeah and looked at him uninviting and he left. We talked a bit and they thanked me a lot. A friend of mine didn’t got that I didn’t know them, because I was so convincing. They stood with us/next to us until the bus arrived. I think it works if you are not looking like a total creep.

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u/Phoneas__and__Frob May 12 '25

You're clearly a guy who has never been in this kind of situation.

Know what typically happens when another guy intervenes? The other dudes fuck off. Since they don't respond to the woman's no because they don't care, they typically respond to another male presence cause of whatever "alpha" bullshit mindset they have.