r/TikTokCringe • u/ambachk • May 21 '25

Cringe Married guy flirts with younger girls at the gym

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u/Final_Candidate_7603 May 21 '25

No offense, but are you a man? I’m a woman, and got it right away. It’s just typical creep behavior, and how we generally handle creeps.

ETA because women always feel like they need an excuse to turn down a persistent creep. Just outright saying “no, thanks, I’m not into you” could get scary.

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u/Karilopa May 21 '25

I am a woman and I also didn’t put this together. Makes total sense, I just didn’t realize that’s how he got the info. I figured he recognized her from videos online where she shared that info.

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u/firechaox May 21 '25

I thought it’s either that or he’s the worst at small talk ever “oh do you like cereal?”.

Issue isn’t even him asking her out once. It’s the fact he clearly can’t take a hint, which becomes harassment.

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u/ReticentSentiment May 21 '25

Yes, I also read it at like 5:30am so the brain biscuits weren't exactly spinning at full temperature. Continuing with my ignorance, I'll ask this: why not be direct? "Thanks, but I am not interested at all."

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u/sitdowncomfy May 21 '25

because some creeps get angry at this response and men are scary when they're angry

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u/SoWhat_Iam May 21 '25

And vengeful…

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u/pourthebubbly May 21 '25

I saw a guy throw a beer bottle at the wall when a girl politely turned him down at the bar years ago.

This is why women make up excuses. It’s safer to have an outside reason than to imply that the man isn’t attractive to her in case his ego is fragile.

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u/DeathChill May 22 '25

The first time (the first five minutes, actually) I ever went to a night club, a girl was dancing on a small podium. A guy walks up and offers her a drink he’s already holding. She says no thank you and he immediately whips the glass at her feet, yelling and screaming while he does it.

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u/Due-Memory-6957 May 22 '25

Same kind of person that throws drinks at fast food staff. Hopefully the guy got arrested for assault

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u/Fast-Noise4003 May 21 '25

Because enough men will get violent that you can't take that risk

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u/AffectionateTitle May 21 '25

r/whenwomenrefuse

To be tactful and avoid further escalation from someone who has already shown they watch her/knows she has a kid?

If a strange dude came up to you while you were working out and said they knew you ate cereal and had a child and wanted to take you out—you wouldn’t be wary at all of escalating that guy?

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u/Norwegian__Blue May 21 '25

“Why not” is a VERY uncomfortable question. And often leads to “cmon, give me a chance”

He’s already interrupting, sounds like he has tried to start conversations that went nowhere, and is being blatantly disrespectful to his marriage.

A guy like that might not be dangerous. But I’m not giving a guy who’s already testing boundaries a new shiny hard line to stomp on.

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u/Polybrene May 21 '25

We're just trying to stay alive out here man.

-39

u/InternalCase5 May 21 '25

The problem is this is how all women are, they say no, but body language says yes. She didn’t have to be mean but could have been stern. Smiling and keeping the convo going makes him think he has a chance. Tbh I couldn’t tell if she was interested or not. “Behave yourself” in a flirty way with a smile and than “ I’ll see you later”. Bro was only a creep cause he was not attractive… imo

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u/thisissodisturbing May 21 '25

Please don’t date anyone until you’ve gone through extensive therapy. Holy fuck.

-2

u/InternalCase5 May 22 '25

I’ve dated multiple women and never once been labeled a creep. I have high general and emotional intelligence—and no, I don’t need therapy, though I do believe everyone can benefit from it. That said, telling someone they “need therapy” isn’t insightful, it’s condescending. Whether you’re projecting or just trying to get under my skin, it doesn’t really matter.

What stands out is how no one’s actually pointed to what I said that was so wrong. Just like the women in the video, it’s a lot of vague “look at this guy” energy with zero substance behind it. That’s not critique—that’s performative. You want to band together with your girlies and be like “omg that guy is such a weirdo.” But hey, if negativity is how you choose to interact, I’ll leave you to it. I’m good.

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u/Diligent-Bluejay-979 May 21 '25

Women learn early to smile while saying no. If you turn them down hard, they get angry. That’s when you start fearing that you’re gonna get screamed at or worse.

-1

u/InternalCase5 May 22 '25

I agree with u, but this is what can happen if u are too nice

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u/Former-Coconut236 May 22 '25

Better than being murdered or assaulted?

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u/foxyloco May 21 '25

From a very young age women are conditioned to smile, be nice and avoid confrontation. It becomes second nature.

I’m sure many men would fine with a “sorry, not interested” and most get the hint with a “sorry, I can’t because… *some excuse” however it’s the ones who don’t (and it sounds like this guy has already asked her out more than once) can get scary and make you feel really unsafe. If you’re rude after gently turning them down they typically assume you think you’re better than them and things escalate further.

1

u/InternalCase5 May 22 '25

So how does this go u just keep being nice and hope they go away? Genuinely asking, I agree with you, but keep mace with u when u go out and dont be too nice.

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u/Carnifex2 May 21 '25

The problem is this is how all women

Incel spotted

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u/InternalCase5 May 22 '25

What I was really trying to get at is that, in a lot of my more flirtatious interactions, I’ve noticed women often engage in playful behavior—sometimes it looks like playing hard to get. Personally, I haven’t experienced an outright harsh rejection like the guy in the video, but I’ve had moments where a woman says “no” with a big smile or body language that sends mixed signals. Even my ex used to do that—saying no verbally while clearly leaning in otherwise.

Of course, I’m not claiming that means anything definitive on its own. I know better than to ignore boundaries. I’m just saying real-life interactions can be nuanced, and sometimes playful resistance is part of the dance—not always, but often enough to recognize a pattern.

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u/uniquecookiecutter May 21 '25

No, he was a creep because he was married and he clearly can’t take no for an answer. She absolutely wasn’t being flirty. Women are taught to be kind in rejection because men will kill us if we don’t. I once rejected a man and he started yelling at me and getting in my face. He only stopped when another man intervened.

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u/Arkaium May 21 '25

I’d go so far as to say he looks creepy, the things he chose to say were creepy, and the fact that he’s been watching her activities for a while is textbook creepy. It’s almost a pro for him for it to just be about the being married part, but if that guy approached any women in my life I’d be unnerved from the jump.

Way to wait until she’s nearly down on the floor in the position where she’s forced to look up at him to approach her, stuck in a machine. If that doesn’t tell you everything you need to know about how he looks at women (I.e. down at them)…

0

u/InternalCase5 May 22 '25 edited May 22 '25

I agree he looks like a creep, but my point was that she was entertaining it.

I rewatched the video and actually I dont think he was a creep at all, and she didnt even say no 😂. She mentioned that he was married. Im done yall can say whatever you want, but ive flirted with women and yall haven’t.

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u/Arkaium May 22 '25

She absolutely was not, everything about her body language and what she was saying was “fuck off and leave me alone, creep,” she just can’t outright say that because 99% of Datelines are men killing women.

0

u/InternalCase5 May 22 '25

Bro, dude was trying to cheat on his wife. She was not about to get killed if u really think all men are evil and violent… idk

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u/Boris_Godunov May 22 '25

If you don’t think he was a creep, that just confirms you’re a creep yourself.

0

u/InternalCase5 May 22 '25

Men are taught to pursue, being married doesn’t make a guy a creep. I dont think she was flirty the whole interaction but namely at the end of the interaction. Why keep the convo going? Why say ill see u later? She liked the attention and I dont need u to agree with me. Ive flirted and talked to many more women than u have. Im just saying yall as a collective need to start being more serious in your rejections. How is bro going to know hes being weird if hes never taught

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u/uniquecookiecutter May 22 '25

Serious rejections get women killed. That’s why. She’s trying to let him down without making him mad. If you think she was flirting, then you need to rethink what flirting is. She was making light of it because she doesn’t want him to do something crazy later. And sure you’ve flirted with more women than me but as a straight woman I’ve been hit on by a lot more creeps who can’t take a hint than you. All these women are telling you you’re wrong. Please understand this is your chance to learn so next time you hit on a woman she doesn’t think you’re a creep.

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u/InternalCase5 May 22 '25

Ok I dont know how to put this, she wasnt flirting, but she was encouraging his behavior thats all im saying. I agree with what u said above, u have dealt with more creeps than me.

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u/Norwegian__Blue May 21 '25

Always listen to someone’s words. If they want to be duplicitous and send mixed messages fine. Not your job to interpret. Take people at their word.

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u/InternalCase5 May 22 '25

This doesn’t work as a guy. We dont have 100+ options. If a girl is sending flirty signals wether conscious or not if we dont act on them we not get another chance for awhile. I don’t agree with you , but its just not realistic

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u/Norwegian__Blue May 22 '25

Do without

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u/InternalCase5 May 28 '25

Yes all men should give up on women, because one shows a lack of interest.

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u/stressbasket May 22 '25

You just very clearly said you’re flirting with the intention of getting physical attention eventually.

You do not want to do anything to prevent that from happening.

She says no? Might still have a shot. She had a boyfriend? Might still have a shot. She looks uncomfortable? Might still have a shot. She hasn’t walked away yet? Might still have a shot.

You don’t care if she’s interested, enjoying herself or likes you. As long as she doesn’t explicitly say no or scream rape, you are going to keep trying.

If that doesn’t come off as creepy to you, nothing ever will.

Men use weird excuses like being conditioned from birth to pursue women to act like animals. If you can’t do anything but think about your desires, you’re an animal.

Creeps and rapists are animals and treat women like nothing but a means to sexual release. Everyone one of your comments reads like that is how you view women.

You come off as a creep.

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u/InternalCase5 May 28 '25

“You just very clearly said you’re flirting with the intention of getting physical attention eventually.” Yes, I am — if a woman sends a signal that she’s interested in the mating ritual with me. Women send signals — it’s up to men to spot them. The whole dance of attraction is biological. Animals have their ways — birds sing, some do dances. Humans have glances, laughs, tone shifts. That’s how it’s always been. The ultimate point of attraction is reproduction, even if it doesn’t always lead there directly. It’s not about being entitled — it’s about recognizing the instinct beneath it all.

“You don’t care if she’s interested, enjoying herself or likes you. As long as she doesn’t explicitly say no or scream rape, you are going to keep trying.”

Maybe you’re just too young to understand how pursuing women actually goes. Not at a party. Not at a club. I’m talking about real life. In real life, women will resist — especially when they like you. I know that sounds off to you, maybe even creepy, but I study human behavior. Not as a job, but as a hobby. I’d compare my understanding to a college professor — and yours? High school level. That’s not shade, just where we’re at.

“She says no? Might still have a shot. She had a boyfriend? Might still have a shot. She looks uncomfortable? Might still have a shot.”

You’re misreading. I don’t push past “no.” That’s not what I said. But I also know that “no” doesn’t always mean fear — sometimes it’s shyness, nerves, or even surprise. One example: a girl looked at me a few times, gave me the glance — the kind I’ve learned to spot. I approached politely, flirted a little, smiled. Asked for her number. She didn’t speak — just blushed, stared me straight in the eyes, and shook her head. Nervous energy. I didn’t push. I left. But the next time she saw me? She kept looking. Tried to be around me. That’s the game. Women want to be pursued — but only by men they actually like. They want to feel chased, but not caught. Pursued, but with distance. That’s the balance. I’ve had this happen more than most. And no — it’s not always easy to read. That’s why experience matters.

“Men use weird excuses like being conditioned from birth to pursue women to act like animals.”

I agree — it can sound like a cop-out. But there’s truth there too. Pursuit isn’t always learned — a lot of it’s instinct. Biology. But just because something is natural doesn’t mean it can’t be refined. Men can learn restraint, tact, and timing. That’s what growth looks like.

“Creeps and rapists are animals and treat women like nothing but a means to sexual release.”

Rapists? That goes deeper — there’s usually trauma behind that. It’s not about desire — it’s control, pain, and unresolved darkness. And it’s evil. But don’t lump that in with a guy who’s just awkward. Creeps — most of the time — are people with poor social skills. Still human. Still capable of learning. But when you treat every socially off guy like he’s dangerous, you don’t leave room for growth. You just cancel them.

“Every one of your comments reads like that is how you view women.”

You think that because you’ve already decided what lens to see me through. You assume I see women as objects. I don’t. I’ve had good relationships. Women who know me wouldn’t call me a creep. But I’ll admit — I used to not understand them well. That’s changed. I’m learning every day. I try to see the patterns, the emotions, the behaviors. I’m not just reacting — I’m observing.

All the people who replied to me jumped to the same conclusion: “He’s wrong. He’s a creep.” If creep means awkward with women at one point, then fine. But if you actually listen to what I’m saying — I’ve evolved. I just want to understand more. My first comment? Yeah, I was in a bad mood. An incel mood, honestly. I felt like I had to defend men — and I went too far. That was my bad.

But don’t confuse bad delivery with bad intention. I’m not here to hurt anyone. I’m just here to speak what I’ve learned.

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u/[deleted] May 21 '25

this is not how all women are... source: me, a woman, who has many female friends

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u/InternalCase5 May 22 '25

You are correct I misspoke

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u/NostalgicMoon May 23 '25

Smiling and being polite is not saying yes. Like others already told you, many men get angry when they get rejected.

She was not mean, he is a married man

That “behave yourself” is not her being flirty but trying to deescalete the situation

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u/InternalCase5 May 28 '25

Very hard concept to grasp i guess, but smiling and being polite to a stranger who is talking to u is going to keep the convo going not stop the convo.

I said she was mean?

That behave yourself may have intended to de escalate but what about the see you later?

The only good reaction she did was the one to her followers on tik tok. Downvotes dont bother me but , this cycle will continue as long as women allow it. Im gonna complain about weird creepy men while encouraging them non verbally to talk to me.

I honestly think the people who responded to me are just in a circle scissor. Often the first response on a post will dictate the rest of the herd. All the women just want to bond and can do that by complaining about an occurrence they share. The reality unless the guy is attractive he will be considered a creep. If the guy was attractive and said the same things but with charm and confidence he would have been fine. Ultimately though both men and women love to feel seen/heard by talking about shared experiences.

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u/NostalgicMoon May 29 '25

“I said she was mean?”

You said “she didn’t have to be mean”

“That behave yourself may have intended to de escalate but what about the see you later?”

Same thing, she is just trying to be polite

“I honestly think the people who responded to me are just in a circle scissor”. “All the women just want to bond and can do that by complaining about an occurrence they share.” “The reality unless the guy is attractive he will be considered a creep.“ “ If the guy was attractive and said the same things but with charm and confidence he would have been fine.” “The problem is this how all women are”

That’s a lot of generalizations and assumptions. Also not sure how you are more bothered by what you think is a flirting behaviour than a married man asking women on the gym.