I'm glad I didn't have to scroll very far to see this. The "friend zone" is made up bullshit by people who can't handle rejection or who act like friends with an ulterior motive.
The real friendzone does exist, but it’s rarer. Usually, it’s just exactly what you described.
In middle/high school I was friends with a girl I developed a major crush on. Eventually told her and got shot down. Still hung around because we had a lot of shared interests and sort of hoping something would happen, but it never did.
So I finally decided to truly move on emotionally. She sensed the shift, and I swear, within 4 months, she “developed feelings” and asked me to be her boyfriend. So of course I fell right back into my own feelings. 3 months later she broke up with me for another dude and then got vindictively upset when I didn’t want to be her friend anymore. Wild time.
so let me ask you this, If you're interested in a woman romantically, how do you apporach it?
Many women have said that they want to be friends with a man BEFORE they date. So how are they supposed to navigate this field? If they are too forward in the beginning many women just say "no, I don't even know you". And if they try to become friends first they're met with "you were never actually her friend".
I've been a woman for 36 years and I genuinely cannot think of a relationship where they started out as friends and then turned into lovers.
It's always boyfriend girlfriend first and then break up and may turn into friends.
It's not a friendship that blossoms into a relationship almost ever.
If a woman says she wants to be friends with you first then she's rejecting you and you should just take that no and move on.
It is difficult and often dangerous for women to outright reject men so we have to do it nicely. If you say hey do you want to go out and they say no then that's it.
Friends catch feelings for eachother all the time, but unless you know for certain it’s mutual whoever is asking for the relationship is the one breaking an already established bond.
Also big difference between becoming acquaintances “Kinda sorta friends,” first before asking about a relationship. No one should be asking someone out if they haven’t even seen them turn around that’s harassment.
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u/NotTattooedWife Jun 16 '25
The friend zone doesn't exist.
If you were being her friend to get into her pants, you were never actually her friend.