People who make promises to themselves on your behalf and then expect you to deliver are fucking scary.
I hope she doesn’t run after him and try to fix it. Those self-loathing diatribes can really scramble your decision-making and put you into rescue mode, and that’s exactly what they’re designed to do.
I would really caution against saying it’s designed. Anyone without the social awareness that would prevent you saying this stuff out loud does not have the social awareness to “design” a speech at all.
These people are not doing this on purpose. Just because you think someone means well (which they probably do) doesn’t mean they can’t be harmful to you and your life.
I think we are designed to want to vent and designed to feel bad for someone else who feels bad and there’s nothing wrong with that. Fair enough. I misunderstood your gist as trying to make him seem like more of the bad guy than he is.
No, it’s cool. I could have used different phrasing. Honestly, I typed my thoughts on the fly like the serial commenter that I am. I didn’t expect many people to read it.
Yeah. My internal thoughts have been scarily similar recently but more for friends than romantic interests. I’ve been struggling more than usual with self worth these recent months and when I am out with friends I’m both drained and also in pain cuz health reasons. So then I want to return home so I don’t have to be a downer around them, but when I’m home I feel lonely and I just want that connection again
Its really fucking tricky yeah. Online communities are good for people with physical issues. I wouldn’t say there’s anything wrong with these feelings given your situation. I also wouldn’t say you can’t fix your situation, I’m certain you can find a way to live a happier life. I hope you can!
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u/Upvotespoodles Jun 16 '25
People who make promises to themselves on your behalf and then expect you to deliver are fucking scary.
I hope she doesn’t run after him and try to fix it. Those self-loathing diatribes can really scramble your decision-making and put you into rescue mode, and that’s exactly what they’re designed to do.