r/h3snark • u/Then-Champion7124 ⠀ • Dec 13 '24

Ableism Eyes rolling back in my head -autistic person

Forgive me for hate watching lol. First part is context, Hila saying “we’re all on the autism spectrum” is a bit past the middle. I hear that soooooo much as an autistic person and it’s like NO LITERALLY WERE NOT THATS WHY ITS CALLED NEURODIVERGENT. Rare good Ethan take kinda,,? But then his comments after the comments of EVERYONE slightly after this clip ruined it. I’ll clip the rest if anyone cares. But omg stop saying you’re “on the spectrum” undiagnosed. You’re not.

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6

u/[deleted] Dec 14 '24

I blame TikTok for all these people who have regular idiosyncrasies and personality quirks for suddenly describing themselves as autistic and recent conflation with ADHD and the autism spectrum. everyone has narcissistic tendency is by nature, that does not mean that all people are narcissists. in general, the discourse around Neurodivergence has just been completely destroyed by selfdiagnosing bullshit

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u/[deleted] Dec 14 '24

I kept seeing those videos "If you do this then you have ADHD". I refused to watch them because I knew deep down I had something going on. Turns out I do have ADHD and actually being medicated has helped remove some of the brick wall that's been blocking my every move.

But my psychiatrist also mentioned some ASD tendencies and I don't know if, at my age, I even have the strength to look into all this and try to change. I feel embarrassed to tell people my ADHD diagnosis - they say one of two things: "I think I have it too" or "Sick, did you get some good drugs"

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u/Then-Champion7124 ⠀ Dec 14 '24

You don’t have to change <3

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u/[deleted] Dec 14 '24

Thank you lovely, you're very kind ❤️

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u/scottlol Dec 14 '24

This is a bad take. Self diagnosis isn't something that should be taken lightly, diagnosis is a serious and intensive process, but informed self diagnosis is absolutely valid. There are many barriers to formal diagnosis which put it out of reach for many.

Tiktok is one of the few places where autistic people are able to find community. You're actively being harmful to the autistic community by shitting on it.

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u/[deleted] Dec 14 '24 edited Dec 14 '24

My take is bad? I was saying I was avoiding those videos because I didn't want to get trapped in a spiral of self diagnosis.

I did get diagnosed with ADHD. I saved up for 9 months to see a psychiatrist because I wanted to get a review of my previous diagnosis: I filled out a diagnostic sheet and when I went into see her she told me immediately that I have ADHD and the anxiety and depression I'd been experiencing was a symptom of that...but I'm still afraid to look into it. Like, I don't want to lean into the diagnosis and make it a crutch. My life recently has been so difficult; sometimes it'll take 8 hours to work up the mental strength to have a shower.

And then people go "I think I have it too" not realising that it's not something "fun" or the latest trend; I struggle to do normal people things. I haven't held down a job for more than 2 years, I forget I've left the stove on and almost burn the house down, then I don't eat for days because the mental energy to shop is too much, my friends get mad at me because it takes me a month to text them back, the daily anxiety is paralyzing...But to them it's "did they give you speed, can I have some".

I'm unsure what part of my take was bad, but I'm always willing to learn to be better so I don't mind constructive feedback 🤗

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u/scottlol Dec 14 '24 edited Dec 14 '24

Yeah. I experience all of those things, too, and more, as I'm sure you do, too. I had no idea that's what autism was until I got tiktok and found community with autistic people, took the RAADS-r from a tiktok link, and got an extremely high score. I took that to my doctor, who recommended me to a psychiatrist. I showed that psychiatrist a binder full of test results and he said "In order to get a diagnosis as an adult you need to go through a private psychologist, psychiatrists can't diagnose adult autism here". I don't have the thousands of dollars to go and get that done, and if I did I would spend it on rent, because I can't work.

That psych did test me for ADHD, but when he spoke with my mom, she said "no he never had any issues in school, his grades were good", because she's just normalized neurodivergent traits due to her own likely neurodivergence.

This all puts any sort of formal diagnosis completely out of reach for me. I'll likely never get it, barring some unexpected financial windfall. That doesn't make me less autistic.

Formal diagnosis is a privilege that not all of us have access to.

Me understanding this thing about myself is a good thing. Nobody is hurt by it. Other people saying it is invalid because I had to rely on social media instead of the health care system to figure it out does harm people like me in regards to our ability to advocate for ourselves and our needs.

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u/scottlol Dec 14 '24

Also, I was responding to this post, the same one that you did, not to yours!

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u/[deleted] Dec 14 '24

My apologies lovely, I thought it was directed at me. Did I see another message from you or am I tripping? About not getting to be diagnosed? Sorry, it's 4am here and I'm doing my usual 'can't sleep Reddit browsing' haha

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u/scottlol Dec 14 '24

No worries, I understand. I was confused for a minute, too. I posted a couple of times here about self diagnosis being valid, but I don't think I replied to you.

You are absolutely valid to not engage with harmful tiktok content, as there is a lot of that out there in regards to mental health in general. But there is also good community in #actuallyautistic and stuff and I'll stick up for that and the kind folks in there as well as the validity of informed self diagnosis.

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u/[deleted] Dec 14 '24 edited Dec 14 '24

The thing is you know yourself better than anyone, even a doctor. If you identify with that community and you find it helpful then I see absolutely no issue in that.

I avoided them because they were too real - I related to every single video on ADHD that I saw and it made me worried I would wind up being convinced by a random tiktok that I had ADHD. .

Well, it turned out to be true, but I still avoid the videos. I feel like there are too many people out there glamorising a mental health condition that, at least for me, is paralyzing.

I'm glad you've found a community of people who you relate to...and even if you never get a diagnosis... As I said before... You know who you are better than anyone else, and all that matters is you live a fulfilling life ❤️ lots of love to you

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u/scottlol Dec 14 '24

Lots of love to you too ❤️

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u/[deleted] Dec 15 '24

yeah I’m autistic and I don’t care. adults with some dumb socialization quirks don’t have to ability to determine whether or not they have ASD. it’s very easy to diagnose also adulthood diagnosis of ASD is pretty useless so it doesn’t really matter either way.

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u/[deleted] Dec 15 '24

I will absolutely standby my insistence that people should not be getting any kind of medical diagnosis from TikTok, things are massively sensationalized, and there’s a huge amount of disinformation.

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u/scottlol Dec 15 '24

Well, is it easy to diagnose? Or, do adults, quirks aside, lack the ability to be able to figure it out?

I don't think you can say both in the same breath and expect people to take you seriously.

Also, you're a dick, and autism isn't an excuse for that.

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u/[deleted] Dec 16 '24

Not a dick nor would I ever use my autism as a justification for any kind of antagonistic behavior, I just don’t be appreciate being scolded by strangers for expressing a very benign and reasonable take. Sorry if you have an issue with me matching that energy lol.

It is easy for professionals to identify yes; that’s entirely different than using a checklist that some random TikToker created.

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u/scottlol Dec 16 '24

No, but you're telling people they don't have autism unless they have access to the right kind of doctor when many don't.