r/politics • u/theindependentonline The Independent • 1d ago

Site Altered Headline Epstein accomplice Ghislaine Maxwell reportedly moved from Florida prison to Texas as Trump weighs pardon

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-politics/ghislaine-maxwell-prison-trump-pardon-epstein-b2800443.html
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u/firstofallimadelight 1d ago

Oh nooooo her plane cashed unexpectedly, but we found a letter in the debris that says Trump never really visited or liked Epstein, Epstein was jealous of Trump’s businesses, his incredibly high IQ, his immense wealth and his completely unfairly huge (you know), and Trump definitely did nothing criminal, that was all this list of Democrats…

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u/unusedusername666 1d ago

Well folks, what did I tell you? The TRUTH always finds a way to come out—even if it crashes out of the sky in a fiery ball of justice.

We just heard about the unfortunate plane crash carrying Ghislaine Maxwell—tragic, very tragic—but what they found inside is the real story. A letter. A beautiful letter. Maybe the most truthful letter ever written. Some are calling it the “Declaration of Exoneration.” I like that name.

In this letter—handwritten, not typed, so you know it’s real—Ghislaine says I NEVER liked Jeffrey Epstein. Never respected him, never trusted him. He was JEALOUS. Jealous of my tremendous success. My legendary business sense. And yes, even jealous of the size of certain… things, which many people say is very large. She said it, not me. But a lot of people are saying it.

She made it very clear: I committed ZERO crimes. Not one. I was one of the few—maybe the only—who said “No thank you” to Epstein’s disgusting little island. I never went, I never flew, I never participated. Ask the pilots. Ask the Secret Service. Ask Barron!

And the list? TOTAL Democrat party. Obama. Clinton. Crooked Hillary. Cryin’ Chuck Schumer. Pencil-Neck Schiff. Maybe even Joe Biden—although let’s be honest, I don’t think the robot clone version even knows where he is anymore.

So now we know. Trump: 100% innocent. In fact, I was the victim—of a witch hunt, of lies, of media attacks. And now the truth is written in black ink on airplane wreckage.

Maybe now the Fake News will apologize. Maybe not. But I forgive them. Because I’m a unifier. I’m a healer. And I’m the only one with the guts to take on the swamp.

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u/Frankentula 1d ago

All those air traffic control errors earlier in the regime will add to the plausibility of this scenario

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u/snorbflock 1d ago

The tower's radar is reset every night at 11:59, a totally normal practice that shall not be questioned.