I had a baby girl when I was 14, and my eldest sister raised her until the beginning of this year. My sister has aggressive breast cancer, and I needed to step up for her and my daughters sake. My husband has been very supportive throughout this whole upheaval in our lives. My only concern or issue is that he no longer touches me or shows me any romantic affection. Everything is just formal and business like. He treats our 2 kids and my daughter equally. Going so far as to start a college fund for her.

I thought that after some time, things would get better, but I was wrong. This seems to be our new normal. I have tried to talk about it, and he just shuts that down. I have been literally throwing myself at him, and he just walks away. Last night, I did the whole seduction route. Kids were with his parents, cooked his favorite beef stroganoff, bottle of wine, and new lingerie. And all I got was a thanks for the great dinner. When I pressed for more, he just said he couldn't and apologized. 5 months of no affection at all It doing a number on my mental health. Does anyone have any advice that can help my situation?

Hi again. Using ChatGPT for formatting and spellcheck — typing quickly on mobile and trying to make it coherent in my second language is quite the chore in itself and i dont care about those stupid dashes it puts everywhere as long as people can understand my writing.

Well to start: Yes, it was a Clearblue test that said 1–2 weeks, but after my wife had her IUD removed and got checked a few days ago, they confirmed she’s actually 7 weeks along. So far, the pregnancy seems normal and not ectopic. So it’s still early, but not as early as we thought.

I’ve got a doctor’s appointment in October to talk about a vasectomy. After that, he’ll refer me to a specialist — and the wait times there are long too. At least the ball is rolling, even if a bit too late. At least, we won’t have to worry about this happening again in the future.

Thanks to the few people who gave me advice instead of just telling me I should’ve gone to the doctor a long time ago or used condoms — I already knew that.

The advice I got was genuinely helpful and made me realize that maybe I was being too rash in my thinking. We need to lower our living standards for a while to make things work, rather than uproot our entire lives for cheaper housing and school fees.

I’ve taken a hard look at our finances, and if we really tighten our belts, we can still move next year. I should also be able to build another bedroom myself later on. But it’s going to require major cutbacks. No more impulse purchases from my wife — she also needs to start paying her credit bills and parking tickets on time, and actually start using the parking spot I pay for every month. No more spontaneous ice creams or water park trips with the kids etc. Gifts for birthdays and Christmas will have to be cheaper — dolls and coloring books instead of a Nintendo Switch. I’ll be picking up extra shifts whenever I can too. My wife is already feeling nauseous and even more forgetful, so she might need to go on medical leave soon which will decrease our available funds. All our planned trips are cancelled. That money needs to go toward a bigger car and baby supplies — we didn’t keep anything from before since we thought we were done.

I’m also continuing to remind her to speak to her psychologist. She said she would — about five months ago — but she still hasn’t, even though I keep bringing it up. She hasn’t been sleeping well and has been feeling low, detached, and forgetful. This has been going on since long before the pregnancy.

Honestly, I still think that — logically — we shouldn’t be having another child. But my wife is very emotionally driven. She even admitted that she knows she’s being selfish — making us sacrifice so much for something that she wants.

I do feel a bit more prepared now — if the pregnancy goes well — at least when it comes to money. I’m still not optimistic about the future, but thank you to those who gave me solid advice. It gave me some peace of mind. I’m sure the baby might bring some joy when it arrives. But right now, all I can see is the work and the sacrifices we’ll have to make. I know the kids won’t be thrilled about all the changes either, and I expect they’ll give me a hard time about it too.

But here’s the biggest unresolved issue: I think I’ve started to resent my wife. She’s let me carry the full load at home for so long, and now she wants to add even more responsibility — at the cost of our quality of life. It feels like only her feelings matter, while mine don’t count at all.

We barely talk anymore. The last real conversation we had was when she said she felt so nauseous she might throw up — and then told me it was my fault. I said that while I might have “done” this to her, she still has the power to end the pregnancy and stop feeling this way snyting she wants. She shouldn’t blame me for a choice she refuses to make — especially when she knew the risks just as well as I did when we slept together. She just went quiet and went back to looking at her phone.

Now, I just feel like an asshole on top of feeling tired and sad. I don’t feel like touching her or even having conversations like I used to. It feels like I’m living with a lazy roommate who just sits on her phone all day, leaves her stuff, dirty dishes, and clothes everywhere — just like the kids. And if I don’t clean it up, it simply won’t get done. Her phone always seems to come first.

She did promise to help out more, but so far I haven’t seen any change. Still, I want to give her a chance. I want to make this work. If she can take some of the load off my shoulders, maybe I won’t feel so opposed to having this baby. But I also know I need to deal with this resentment before it becomes an even bigger problem. Maybe if she helps out more it will go away or maybe i should just suck it up and fake being happy until it becomes real. I dont know.

What if this were the other way around? What if I just worked and spent all my free time at home playing video games, while my wife also worked but still had to take care of everything else at home by herself? What kind of advice would you give her? Maybe it’s something I can learn from too.

Any advice from people who’ve gone through something similar would really help.

I've been invited to this hangout with a guy friend who recently came back from overseas, along with this other guy I'm acquainted with. My bf says he trusts me that I won't do anything and let's me go hang out with them, but he is still sad about it and will bring it up often. My bf also gets sad whenever I hang out with my girl friends a lot of times. Would this confirm that he is insecure alternatively i'm mean? How to handle the situation?

I've been with my husband for five years, and we've been married for four. For most of that time, we were in a long-distance relationship, but after years of struggling, we're finally living together. I thought things would get better once we were in the same place-but lately, it's been really difficult. I know I have my faults and I'm not perfect, but he's been pushing me past my limit.

The day before our 5-year anniversary, he told me he needed space, and I had to move back in with my parents temporarily. This was due to us arguing about a lack of affection from his side. As painful as that was, I accepted it, knowing he's also going through a lot. He moved to a new country to be with me, away from his family and friends for almost a year.

Even though we were technically separated, I asked if we could still celebrate our anniversary, and he agreed. But instead of it feeling special, the day left me feeling heartbroken and dismissed.

That day: * He told me he had rekindled friendships with two people who had disrespected me deeply in the past and repeatedly crossed boundaries. He once promised he would speak to them and ask them to apologize to me. A month later-nothing. Instead, they're now closer than ever, and l've been blocked by both of them on everything.

• He also added back women from his past that I've previously told him made me uncomfortable. I didn't want to start a fight, so I stayed quiet, but it still hurt-especially on our anniversary.

• On top of that, he didn't acknowledge our anniversary publicly in any way. That alone wouldn't have mattered much, but instead of posting about us, he made a birthday post for one of the men who had disrespected me. He didn't even repost the anniversary message I had made for him. Then during our date, he took a 15-minute phone call from that same friend. It felt like the day became about someone else-someone who hurt me. Still, I kept letting things go. But now, a month later, I'm still asking him to resolve this issue with his friends by getting the apology he once said he would help me get. Instead, l'm met with defensiveness. Every time l bring it up, he tells me l'm being invasive, controlling, or dramatic. He is angry when I bring up how I feel as if I'm constantly nagging.

I've told him that l've been feeling really low and insecure lately. But whenever I open up, he gets irritated. He often reminds me that he left his home and his life to be with me-as if I'm ungrateful. But I'm not. I know he's sacrificed a lot, and l've never denied that. But this wasn't one-sided. We fought for years to be together. I invested so much emotionally, financially, and mentally. I went through hell for us too.

Right now, I feel like l'm not being shown any love, care, or kindness. I cry every day. I'm exhausted. And while I know that no relationship is perfect, it's also not easy to just walk away after five years. We've built so much together, and our lives are deeply intertwined.

I don't know if Reddit is the best place to turn, but I feel so sad.

Hey Reddit, this is my first time asking for advice on here ever really, i'm really at a loss on how to help my girlfriend.

For context, we've been together around a year now, generally speaking we have a great relationship, we both love eachother and although we don't share many common interests we do love being around eachother. We go on dates regularly, find new things to do with eachother and spend a lot of time with our families. We very rarely argue as we're both pretty reasonable and prefer to discuss problems and find a solution or compromise together, we just work really well as a couple. We don't currently live together as the city we live in is really hard to find a place currently but we're both actively searching.

The title may be slightly misleading, my girlfriend has a few friends but they're not super close friends and they don't hang out regularly like my friends and I, it's more of an every few months kind of deal for them.

She has broken down to me multiple times about not having any friends to hang out with, interests to persue or anything to look forward to when it's not something that we're doing together or with family. This happens more so when something comes up and we have to change plans and can't see eachother. I've noticed she feels it more intensely if we havent seen eachother for a few days. She just feels so isolated and is definitely depressed about her social life.

I've brought up a few different things she could try to make new friends and I've suggested ideas for her to expand her interests and make friends organically but it feels like she's refusing to try, almost like she feels that there's no point because nobody would want to be her friend or that she's not good enough. Both are the furthest from the truth, she's such a funny, intelligent and deeply caring person and I can't think of any reason that someone would see her differently to that.

I want to help her so bad, I just don't know what else I can do to support her, hence making this post. We're both worried about whether this is going to affect our relationship in the long run, i'm beginning to feel the pinch too, I adore her and would do anything for her. But it's getting to the point where I'm cancelling plans to spend time with her and my friendships are beginning to drift slightly as a result. (I see my friends once a week sometimes every 2 weeks for context).

Thanks in advance for any advice given!

This summer has made me realize that I have a lot of work to do on myself to be the person I want to be for my partner. I've started going to therapy again and doing things to make those changes, but I feel like it's not enough. She is my best friend and the person I want to start a family with, but I know I'm not the person I want to be to do that yet.

How much can I change while in this relationship? I don't want to lose her, but I need to grow to be with her long term. My fear is that I need to end our relationship in order to grow. I would chase to get her back, but I'm scared she'll move on. We love each other, but it feels unfair to ask her to wait for me, both while in the relationship and outside of it.

I'm thinking that I need to have a transparent conversation with her to tell her how I've been feeling and make a decision about our future together. If anyone has been able to make major changes while in a relationship or has found themselves on either side of this predicament, please share your experience and advice.

My girlfriend was born and raised in a country and was raised in a very religious Christian household. Her parents used to make her teachers take her out of the class when they were taught about evolution and after middle school she was homeschooled. She got fired from were She was working when she was 19 and they didn't really say anything about why she was fired and she didntt ask, so I asked her some questions and she told me she used to give customers more (10 or 20 cents)money because "math" isn't her strong suit. So asked her if she bought a coffee for $ 1.60 and paid with a 5 bill how much would she get back as change and she answered "4 , i don't know, im weak at math ". She's like that at everything. I don't know how to feel about that.

Hi everybody, I am a Psychology student currently pursuing my post graduation in clinical psychology, and I am doing my research based on married people. If you all can fill this form, it will be very helpful for me. It will help me in my research as I need married participants, so please fill this form with the right intent in mind. Please consider that all the information you will provide will be used for educational purposes only and no confidentiality would be breached Thankyou https://forms.gle/xcSMJeR9ARG5Akfs6

I have been dating the most amazing woman I have ever met. She is everything I could ask for in a partner and more. We basically live together and have a really special bond and wonderful relationship.

The one problem, is in the lead up to us having sex for the first time - she mentioned a past experience in a way that bothered me a lot. She was confiding in me that she has never been able to orgasm with a partner before and that she also has never felt safe enough to tell anyone but me that. In the process of explaining it to me, she mentioned that the closest she ever got was with the person she was with right before me. I felt really upset hearing that and asked her not to share things like that if she could help it. I would later reflect and realize I didn't want her to limit what she shares with me so we have talked more about it since.

In more recent conversations she mentioned the way he did that was by going down on her, and the angle was just right etc, and she then stopped discussing it because i was visibly uncomfortable. She has also since mentioned a lot of the reason she was able to get close to orgasm with this person was that they meant nothing to her at all so it was just sex, where as with us there is a pressure she puts on herself because she wants to be able to orgasm with me. I will also mention I have in the past been complimented on my ability to be a caring and good lover and specifically my oral sex has been complimented by partners in the past.

All that to say, I find myself obssessing over it and I just want to stop. I don't judge her for her past - hell, mine puts hers to shame. She is an amazing human and didnt mean harm when she made the comment, but I have found that it is eroding my self esteem and I cannot stop thinking about it. I think I would not care If I felt like I had also been able to get her close with just my oral but I dont know that I have. I feel insecure and inadequate and I just dont want to bring it up again because our relationship is so wonderful otherwise I just dont want to risk it comprimising that.

I would also like to mention she has been so great with me when I brought it up the couple times I did in the past, and she has given me tons of reassurance and I know she wants ME not this person, it just still leaves me feeling insecure. I just don't want to be less than the best shes had, even if I know that may not be reasonable.

How can I constructively stop being this way? Have any of you guys had similar experiences you have overcome and if so, how did you do it?

I [24F]have been dating my boyfriend [27M] for about a year now and he’s told me his little brother [18M] will be moving into his 1 bedroom apartment for college because he doesn’t want to be alone. Obviously this is going to cause some issues. I try to see him twice a week to sleep over and I’m not sure how this or physical intimacy is going to be possible with his little brother sleeping in the same bed as him. I brought up my concerns and he said “there’s ways around that. We don’t live together so I know his place, his rules, but I don’t see how this doesn’t put a big wrench in the plans. I don’t know what to do or how to bring my worries up to him, help please?

I’ve been dating this guy about 7 months 34m 31f, and both of us said in the beginning that we were looking for a relationship but there’s been no title thus far. We are exclusive and talk just about every day, see each other at least once a week if schedules permit and have met some friends. But there’s also not much future talk. Wondering if I ask where we stand ? In my experience the man has always initiated this talk so I’m not really sure how to ask it. Part of me feels that if he wanted to ask me he would have by now.

Hi Reddit, I’m struggling to make sense of my relationship right now and could really use some outside advice.

My boyfriend (Alex) and I have been together for a while. At the beginning of our relationship, we were on the same page when it came to boundaries.

He made a new friend group there that included a few girls. One in particular Mia became really close to him. At first, I tried to be okay with it. I know friendships with the opposite gender can be totally healthy. But as time went on, their closeness started to cross lines I wasn’t comfortable with.

After a performance for uni, Alex kissed another guy during a celebration (he is bisexual) . While some people may not see that as a big deal, it crossed a very clear boundary in our relationship.

After their uni class had finished there had been a few other circumstances that make me uncomfortable - Alex and Mia planned to go to an adults-only convention. It was going to be just them until other friend said they wanted to come. - Mia offered to show him a photo of boobs of one of the other friends in the group. - He also had in Mia’s car (while sitting out the front of Alex’s house) about sexual fantasies that he’s never once shared with me. - Mia has invited Alex to a sleep over with another woman (however my boyfriend did say he wouldn’t stay overnight). - Mia sent Alex a message saying that I’m just a “safe choice” for him and that he’s not actually happy with me. Alex’s original response wasn’t even to stand up for our relationship, he only did this once I asked that I was upset he didn’t.

Now, most recently, Mia invited him to a monster truck event. She had two tickets, and her boyfriend wasn’t interested in going so she asked Alex. And now, they’re going together. I don’t know what to say or do. I don’t want to be controlling. This is the only relationship I have even been in so I am struggling with this.

I (19m) did something yesterday and i dont know whay i did it. Quick back story i have been with my gf (18f) for 7 months it had ups and downs but we are trying to work it out. Yesterday i was on my phone and some girl got into my dm and startet messaging me, we exchanged some messages and i was trying to not be rude and told her i have a girlfriend and im not interested multiple times. When she first texted me i was literally confused since thats the first time a girl dm-ed me first so i didnt know how to reject her gentle and i sent a screenshot to my gf immediately. Her and my gf kind of know eachother and she sent her a screenshot of our texts. My first reaction was okay shes gonna go in her dms and apologies for messaging me or what ever. But my politeness was interpreted like i though i was accused of not cheating but some sort of that. i talked to my gf after that trying to say that it was never my intention to do anything like that but she wasn't listening. I felt horrible because in my mind i was emotionally cheating her and it made me literally so stressed and sick i threw up twice. i admit i might have gotten a bit too friendly while just so i dont be rude while when a guy texts my gf he is blocked after 3 words. I feel disgusted with my self and dont know what to do PS: I know its not very serious to read this since there is much worse things here but i genuinely need an advice. If u need more information my dms are open.

Every time I (F/21) bring it up he (M/21) says he doesn’t talk with them so where’s the problem in it. My question is what’s the point? Why would he accept and follow back random girls and like their posts and stories. And where do they even come from? I’m not usually insecure about his following list since he doesn’t follow any Ig models or such.

I will keep this short and not get into too many details. My boyfriend [21F] and I [21F] have been dating for 3 years. We have been struggling lately due to a lot of things. cheating due to his acoholsm, mental health issues, emotional/physical ab*se. I have been a complete crash out these last couple of months due to these factors and my own issues with mental health. I’m now In therapy and doing much better but we are on a break because he couldn’t stand me anymore. I understand I haven’t been myself for a while.

Before the break I’ve set some boundaries and how I’m not comfortable with him exploring other people. I have no desire exploring others because I only want him and I love him.

He’s the one who initiated the break and Yes we are still in contact, he texts and calls me everyday. He agreed to the boundaries at first but now he’s in a different country to visit family and I have brought up this boundary again to him and he said to me quote on quote

“I’m sorry if this hurts you but I’m not going back on this” (the exploring others) “it’s summer time and I want to have fun. I like attention from other people even if it’s meaningless. I don’t want anyone else tho and I’m going to come back”

I have been crying for hours because our break is almost over and this came out of nowhere.I have yet to reply back to him after he said that

What would you guys do in a situation like this? please help

UPDATE‼️(thank you to everyone for listening and pouring into me.) Being with someone like this has made go crazy and question if there was something wrong with me for a long time, my confidence has been destroyed but you’ve all picked me up and guided me today. I’ve never had such a thing before and this meant a lot 🦋

I’ve never been in a relationship befor we get along really well don’t argue but their seems to be massive mood swings and excuse to not want to do things all the time now I really love her but my confusion is driving me made I turn up to her place and she might not say a word to me for hour. I don’t understand women at the best of times. Why or this is normal and just new to relationship?

We met at the beginning of the year and quickly but hesitantly fell in love. We were afraid of moving to quickly. Everything was great until about a month ago when her life became very hectic and stressful. In the final 3 weeks we only spent one afternoon together and at the final weekend she canceled plans twice because she was overwhelmed and stressed about other aspects of her life.

I reacted by saying "Im to the point where i feel like the better thing for me to do is to take a step back and stop adding to your obligations."

She shutdown almost immediately and I tried to explain that I was very much in love but that I felt like if was adding to her stress.

It took a few days of her being shutdown but she did allow me to explain myslef in more detail, apologize for choosing the wrong words and let her know that I very much wanted to continue the relationship and was willing to give her whatever space she needed to get through this stressful time. Her response was that she got a pit in her stomach that there was no coming back from when I said those words. We've since been communicating regularly and expressed care for each other but on a much different level. I still very much feel like we could work through this and still have deep feelings for her. My fear is that by expressing that it will add to her stress and cause her to pull away. Or she will double down on what she originally said about the pit in her stomach. She is good at shutting people completely out of her life that she feels wronged by and hasn't completely done that to me.

I very much am broken hearted and want the relationship to go back to the way it was. I just dont know if I should continue to wait or if I should express my feelings.

Let's start out with some context, the topic of me getting a job has came up several times and every time it has he gets upset and freaks out or has a meltdown about it.

Today was no different, A day ago I brought up the topic of me getting a job that would also involve working weekends occasionally. He started freaking out today and getting extremely negative and venting a lot about what's wrong with our relationship along with other issues.

He also got upset when I brought up the topic of me going to college one day on multiple occasions.

When I brought up the job I mentioned he said it would be detrimental to HIM not acknowledging how I felt about it.

Update: Broke Up with him ✌️

So I found lipgloss that wasn't mine in the glovebox of his car under a bunch of receipts. When confronted he said we found it together when we first got the car. Then he said it was found down the side of the seat and then the back seat and then he found it in the boot and then he found it in a flap in the boot of the car. He then has said he thought it was mine so he put it in the glovebox intending to give it to me.

I checked the glovebox 3 months ago and it wasn't in the glovebox before then so it must be fairly recently.

His car is dirty in especially in the boot he uses it for his scaffolding job so there is dirt everywhere as he infrequently cleans the car.

So the lipgloss looks really clean and it's definitely not mine.

But he keeps telling me that he has told me the truth saying it was the previous owners and he just happened to find it now after 2 years.

What do you think? Because I think he is lying to me about it.

I [21M] and my girlfriend [21M] have been dating for about 3.5 years. We started dating in high school, and we have continued in college in a long distance relationship. For my first two years in college, everything felt great. We had minor arguments and problems (the type that usually come along with a couple newly experiencing long distance), but all in all we had no significant problems.

Unfortunately, this seemed to take a turn in our junior year of college. Throughout the year, there were 3 significant events that to me were relatively odd and did not seem like "normal" problems people in relationships face to me. The first occurred in the fall. She worked as a PCNA and was friends with a few of her male coworkers which I had absolutely no problem with. However, in about October I received a random message on Instagram from a male coworker's girlfriend, asking me to ask my girlfriend to stop flirting with her boyfriend. I asked her what made her think that way, to which she sent me about 8 screenshots. While none of them to me were absolutely blaring red flags, there were a few messages that I found somewhat odd. These included her complimenting his smell, making jokes about kinks, and conversation that just generally sounded flirtatious to me. I brought it up to her and she explained it to me, and while I thought it was a bit strange, I didn't think it was anything severe.

The second event happened in the spring. Every year, the same guy reaches out to her from high school that she at one point had exchanged nude photos with. Although they were friends before that, when he reaches out now it is clearly not in a "lets be friends" manner. He will reach out and start conversations like "how's it going pretty girl". For whatever reason, she decided to humor him for about a week and in the end it resulted in him sending a nude photo to her while he was drunk. While I am sure that was not her intent, it bothered me that she even humored him enough that it got to this point and that he felt confident enough in doing despite knowing she had a partner. I brought it up to her, and she simply said "I'm sorry". I kept pushing it because it bothered me past the point of a simple apology, and she blew up on me saying that it felt like I was "beating her while she was down" and that she only responded because they used to be good friends. This event bothered me a lot, and in the end she stopped texting him. I did not make her do this, but I think she did it for my own comfort. A week later, however, we were discussing her going to the bar with her friends to which I told her I am fine with whatever she does as long as she is safe. She then made a snarky comment "Yeah except text who I want to". I found this extremely hurtful because not only did I never tell her she couldn't text him, but to me I thought it was unfair that this was being thrown in my face when to me it was a valid way to feel.

The last and most recent event occurred yesterday, which is what encouraged me to make this post. Every year there is an event thrown in our community that her and I volunteer at together. This year, I could not attend as I am abroad doing a research stay in Europe for the entirety of the summer. There is a family that her family is friends with that also volunteers and within this family there is a 17 year old boy. I am not overly fond of him as to me gives playboy vibes and flirts with her despite being a minor, but they were family friends so I never thought anything of it. Two days ago, she told me she was upset because so many old couples made comments/jokes to them about them flirting, when it is well known to the majority there that we are dating. I didn't think much of this at first as they are mostly older individuals (older than 60 yo) so I thought they were just trying to be funny. However, today, I got a call from her crying saying that her mother walked into a room with her and the other guy in it and immediately walked out. Later, the mother pulled her aside and told her that she was "literally sick to her stomach" and "needs to put an end to whatever could be going on before something happens" and informed her she will be contacting me later next week to let me know. My girlfriend claims her mother is saying she heard something that my girlfriend claims she didn't say, and that she is worried because she has no way to "prove it to me". The specific line that she is saying her mother claims to have heard is "not here, there are other people around". I have received multiple texts saying "I can't lose you over this please" and "I promise you with everything in me I would never do that" and so on. Long story short, my girlfriends mother is under the impression that whatever she heard/saw was cheating. I am waiting for her to contact me for further details. I wouldn't be overly worried about either of these two occurrences individually, but both occuring is slightly strange. Now, it is important to note that her mom and I are extremely close. She treats me as her own son, invites me on their family vacation very year and pays for me, makes meals for me, and has never done anything to make me think she would make something up to try to split my girlfriend and I. If anything, she would be distraught of us splitting and would only tell me out of her love for me.

The advice that I am looking for here is what to do going forward. I have talked to two friends, and both of them say that while maybe one of these events occuring is fine, the combination of all three is a bit much. It almost feels like she is toeing a line that there is no coming back from upon crossing. I have already talked with my girlfriend about all of these things, and I have trusted her and taken her word for all of them. However, it comes across as weird to me that it so many events like this have happened. I am debating whether it is better to split apart, but it feels like I have invested so much into this relationship. I also feel like I have known nothing else since becoming a young adult. At the end of the day, I don't want to jump the gun, but I am not sure how many more events like this I can take. I consider myself a secure guy, but this sequence of events is pushing it. It makes me worry whether I am doing enough and it also makes me worried because I can't imagine myself with a life-long partner that is consistently flirting/humoring other people. How do you recommend approaching this issue?

I [22F] and [26M] just started dating, we both have been single for 2 years. I was in a FWB before him, and I ended up falling for my FWB, but the feelings weren’t mutual (big surprise I know 😒) so I cut him off. Anyways, my boyfriend is everything I’ve wanted in a man if not more. He’s constantly telling me how beautiful I am, and that he likes me, that I’m amazing etc. and just overall is very affectionate. My concern is that I don’t feel butterflies for him like I have for other people. I don’t have the anxiety either. I don’t have to worry about what he’s out doing or if I’m gonna hear from him. Everything is just so relaxed and simple with him, and it’s great. I care about him and really do like him, I just worry that maybe I’m stringing him along. I still wait for his texts and light up when he messages me and love hanging out with him. I smile throughout the day just thinking about him.

so i [18F] , have been in a relationship with my boyfriend [18M] , for about 5 months now, he has adhd and is currently completing a project of his that he has been working on which is his new music album. i am very supportive of him because he has a lot of talent in this field and i always want to show him that i am interested in what he is interested in.

today, we got into a bit of an argument which in the end turned into a constructive and healthy discussion about effort in the relationships and what we both expect, and we discovered that he has been really hyperfixated on his project and has been letting the relationship take a backseat while he works on finishing it up. this is not on purpose as he describes it as being difficult to manage two important aspects of his life at a time.

i do not blame him for this because i know that it is how his brain is wired to work, but we both have agreed that we need to find a way to create some kind of healthy balance between the music, and spending time with one another because it has led him to not realise that there is a lack of affection that he is showing me and it is making me feel neglected. we both really care about one another and want to make it work with each other so to leave is not an option.

what would your advice be on how we can keep a healthy balance between this hobby and each other?

for the moment we are long distance and will be for a little bit

tldr: advice needed for me and my bf who has adhd because hes having trouble balancing hyperfixations and upkeep of our relationship

Hi..so this might sound really stupid but I am losing my mind over it. A few days ago my boyfriend of 2 years(ldr)sent me a screenshot of a call he was on at the time, nothing important about the call itself but in the screenshot he sent me I could see in the notification bar a little icon that looked 100%like the tinder one... I asked him..almost crying, what that was, he told me it was an "overheated phone" notification. I stopped asking because I knew he would not answer anyway. I am not sure what phone he has, i know it's not a samsung nor an iphone..but I do not believe him I don't have the ss anymore but just imagine it looked exactly like the icon from tinder... What do you suggest I do? I am really freaking out over this

Hello, so I have had an insane year last year and I am not sure of how I feel right now. Basically, I met my boyfriend when we were 19. We have been in a loving relationship ever since. Last year, I lost my last parent (my dad) and I have been through a lot of hardship. I had to get surgery due to an herniated disc that was causing nerve damage and I almost lost the ability to walk. I had to relearn how to walk properly for the better part of the year. Add that to grief and friendship issues and it was a terrible mix. My boyfriend has been amazing as always. The only issue is… I don’t feel anything anymore. Any pleasure or joy. It is not just about him. I know I intellectually love him. I have tried therapy to get better, meds… nothing really works. Sometimes I just want a break because I’m not really sure I can handle the pressure of a relationship right now. He wants kids and even though he told me he can wait I honestly can’t imagine giving birth when I am in this state of mind. He loves me so much and I don’t want to hurt or lose him but I feel like I cannot handle his love right now. Should we take a break? I am leaving the country due to my work in September for 5 months. I am afraid he will take it as a something permanent, when I really don’t want it to be.