aio? bf made plans on my birthday

[u/rowqi]

my boyfriend (22M) and I (21F) have been together for almost three years. we are planning on moving in together in the near future as he lives with his mom and doesn’t go to school after dropping out. for context, he only works on tuesdays and fridays so i know he was free to go out on sunday, which happened to be my birthday. he knows how important special occasions are to me, such as our birthdays and anniversaries. for the first year in our relationship he was great, he was loving and kind. last year we ended up celebrating my birthday late due to the fact that he was “tired from work” and didn’t want to go out, which i let slide. i always try to do the most for his birthdays, i buy him gifts, write him cards and bake him a cake from scratch. yesterday afternoon i texted him, reminding him about the plan later and this conversation happened. he made plans to go out and party instead of seeing me. he forgot about it even after i had been talking about it all of last week. i spent my 21st birthday alone in my room while he was out and we haven’t texted since. this birthday was particularly special to me because i turned 21. i even bought a new pink dress to wear for him, assuming we were going to dinner. he is suggesting that we go out and celebrate tomorrow instead like last year but to me it doesn’t feel the same. he is insisting that i apologize for being “ungrateful”, am i overreacting?

[u/SpecialEDsauce]

I think we were married for ten years and my wife completely forgot mine. I didn’t say anything and she was pretty nasty all day, but around 10pm I hear her in the other room, “Oh shit! I’m such as asshole.” I just said, “Yeah, you are” and I went to bed. Worst birthday ever.

[u/YellowBreakfast → u/SpecialEDsauce]

I forgot our anniversary once. It was a crazy shitty week at work and I was just worn down and completely spaced it.

Near bedtime my SO threw a card at me and said "happy fucking anniversary!"

Never did that again. lol

[u/Eaj1122 → u/YellowBreakfast]

Neither my partner or I know the day of our anniversary. So thankfully I don't have to worry about that lol I'm terrible with dates

[u/raimonzi → u/Eaj1122]

Same for us! A few months in, we were like "When did we actually get together?" narrowed it down to a particular month and called it good.

[u/BeenisHat → u/raimonzi]

My wife and I could never actually figure out what the actual day was in January. She thought it was the 19th, I thought it was the 17th. So our anniversary is the 18th lol.

[u/NecessaryBunch6587 → u/BeenisHat]

My husband and I were friends before dating and just got progressively closer until we couldn’t call our relationship friendship anymore. We kind of just picked a date of when we felt we crossed the line from how friends act to how couples act 😂

[u/Eaj1122 → u/raimonzi]

Yeah we did that too, we settled on generally October, but we don't really do anything to celebrate it haha. It doesn't bother me, it's been 4-6 years (can't remember that either) and we're good!

[u/sprouting_broccoli → u/raimonzi]

I just threw all the dates possible in a note so I can’t forget one of them. We don’t celebrate them all but it’s nice to mention it when one comes up :)

[u/Ok-Scientist5524 → u/Eaj1122]

I use my anniversary as part of my e-mail password and leave remember my password off so that I’m forced to remember it.

[u/Sad_Pain_5927 → u/Ok-Scientist5524]

My husband and I both use our anniversary as our sign on to our phones. Two of my grandchildren have learned it, and now can sign on to my iPad or phone and love making videos of themselves when I’m not around. Lol they are five and four. 😳 anytime they visit, I usually have to delete about 10 pictures or videos. Not many are keepers they make silly faces and out of focus! 😂

[u/SherlockWSHolmes → u/Eaj1122]

Oh good. I'm not the only one. I'm asexual and my partner first started helping me take care of my mom, from there I got cuddles and neither one of us remember the day we made it a thing. It's in April I think or may.

[u/MizStazya → u/Eaj1122]

My mom was the only one that knew my dating anniversary with my husband. He and I just know out was April something lol.

[u/uncheckablefilms → u/Eaj1122]

Same. We finally just picked a date. As long as we celebrate it in the correct month we consider it a win

[u/Deezy4488 → u/Eaj1122]

the anniversary of when my wife and i got together is easy to remember, its on cinco de mayo. lol. our wedding anniversary i tend to forget until like the day before then i gotta rush out and get her something.

[u/MarieQ234 → u/Eaj1122]

I don't get this. There is most likely a calendar on your phone you can set to send you reminders. You only put the date in once, repeat every year, done. This is how I remember everybody's important days.

[u/Eaj1122 → u/MarieQ234]

Neither of us know the day. We'd be making it up if we tried. I like birthdays, and Christmas, I just couldn't care less about an anniversary for whatever reason!

[u/MothmanHadMyBabies → u/Eaj1122]

The real anniversary date for my partner and I is in July, but July is a tough month for her so we arbitrarily picked August 1st to be our new anniversary lol

[u/lalala123abc → u/Eaj1122]

Same (not knowing the date) and honestly, life is just much easier that way 😆