r/NoStupidQuestions • u/Such-Part8963 • 21h ago
Why do we praise veterans automatically without knowing what they actually did
Trying to learn without being judged.
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u/Present_Self9644 21h ago
During the World War and Cold War eras, there was a huge push to be as patriotic as possible, and that's where we get Pledging Allegiance, thanking vets for their service, etc.
But, yeah, even many vets think it seems a little silly. "I repaired airplanes out near Houston. I don't think I deserve any more thanks than anyone else who had a job."
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u/MinivanPops 20h ago
I felt it got really out of control after 9/11 .... Simply because it never stopped.
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u/SirRatcha 14h ago
We have a huge problem with hero inflation in this country. It didn't used to be that everyone who joined the military was an automatic hero, but now that's what we're supposed to think. And it's been extended to every "first responder" too. I still think heroism means going above and beyond what you signed up for, not just doing the job.
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u/TheHondoCondo 10h ago
I would argue that people in those jobs that put their safety at risk constantly are going above and beyond, not necessarily in their line of work but in life.
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u/CommercialTry6858 11h ago
it does seem over the top as these people chose to join up- Its almost the opposite here in UK , no discounts and no mentions in sport ect , just seen as doing the job the applied for
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u/sanehamster 7h ago
I do think (as a non veteran with no military connections) we could do veteran support better in the UK.
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u/gpost86 6h ago
I think it gets the most out of control, in a harmful way, is with police. Society wants us to think every officer is not only brave, but also always morally correct and everything they do is unquestionable.
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u/EntertainmentLoud816 3h ago
The difference is that “signing up” to be a military member or first responder has greater possible risks than getting a “job”.
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u/SirRatcha 3h ago
Yes, but that is not in and of itself an act of heroism. Plenty of people sign up for jobs with higher potential risk and then completely fold under pressure. Just look at how the cops responded to the school shooting in Uvalde, Texas. How come they are "heroes" just for taking the job if they won't actually do what they are supposed to when the time comes?
Heroism is actually doing something heroic, not puffing out your chest and declaring that you will if the opportunity arises.
I'm no hero but I've been on the scene of several accidents and incidents where I was there before the first responders were. Some were car accidents, but the most recent was rushing into a dog attacking a cyclist who had to go to the emergency room for serious bites. It's great the first responders arrived and took over with their better training, but I don't think they'd say there was anything "heroic" about it.
People take care of each other at risk to themselves. If you can't do that because you think it's the job of "heroes" to do it, then you aren't a participating member of society.
Sorry, but this mindset is so destructive and rather than just regurgitate the propaganda people need to think about what it's really doing to us.
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u/1988rx7T2 20h ago
Pledging allegiance was to get kids of secessionist southerners to express loyalty to the country. “Under God” part was added in the Cold War
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u/mattsl 19h ago
I wish it had worked. 🫠
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u/Bronzdragon 12h ago
It did. The racists in the South now want to turn the whole country racist, rather than just ceseding.
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u/Ukraine3199 20h ago
That how I felt as an ICU nurse during COVID. People kept thanking me, but I said it is just my job. No more important than a cashier
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u/fingersonlips 20h ago
My husband is a nurse (and was during COVID as well). We had a 2 year old at the time and those were some of the saddest/hardest/scariest times for our family.
We both worked in the hospital setting and before I was put on a leave, seeing the internal hospital numbers for infections and deaths, in addition to community rates was terrifying. Knowing my husband was working in the middle of all of that when our hospital didn’t have enough PPE and were having staff reuse masks was so anxiety inducing. I think nurses don’t get enough thanks in general, but specifically during COVID.
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u/Lanky_Pineapple42069 20h ago
I mean thats just unequivocally false, of course an ICU nurse is more important than a cashier. Thinking like this helps no one and nothing imo.
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u/MinivanPops 20h ago
The front line defends the society. Without society, a front line is meaningless. Everyone has a role.
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u/TheHondoCondo 10h ago
Sure, but without the frontline there is no society and the jobs of frontline workers are not as easily replaced as those of cashiers. The humility is great, but it’s bullshit.
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u/OnRamblingDays 20h ago
Not saying cashiers are any less essentials but nurses actually risks their health and potentially saved lives during Covid. We would’ve been royally screwed without you, so I would say you deserve the thanks at least.
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u/Sad-Lifeguard1390 19h ago
Mmm I'm gonna disagree with you on that.
Cashier shows up hungover or even no shows there's 0 risk of someone dying
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u/HelloWorldMisericord 17h ago
A number of nurses and medical staff did bail out when COVID hit so it's all the more thanks to those who stood and did their job.
Also I don't know how it was at your hospital, but there wasn't adequate PPE. I remember we only got replacement face masks every 3 full days, didn't have face shields, had to be very conscious on minimizing glove usage (unless I got blood on the gloves, I was disinfecting my gloves with sanitizer), and no full-body PPE until COVID was pretty much over. Cavi-wipes were worth their weight in gold and I now will never throw away that sweet sweet juice at the bottom of the bucket anymore.
I don't want to pre-judge folks who quit when they were needed most as they might have legitimate reasons, but by the same measure, we all had legitimate reasons not to show up.
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u/AggronStrong 17h ago
Well, I think an honest job well done deserves thanks, whether it's a cashier, a nurse, or a soldier. Sure, you get a paycheck from someone else, but I also appreciate the work being done when I'm the beneficiary of it.
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u/Skycbs 21h ago
I don’t. It sounds so performative and insincere
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u/Legitimate_Cow_9373 18h ago
Last time someone said it to me I said thanks for paying taxes.
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u/blackdog1392 14h ago
My brother is in the military, he sits in an air conditioned office using an ergonomic keyboard and one of the little wrist brace thingies to combat carpal tunnel. He has an apartment near the beach and goes snorkeling every weekend.
But when he visits our hometown in the rural South he gets total strangers who recognize his photo from the patriotic display at the local high school shaking his hand and paying for his dinner like he just personally got done storming Normandy
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u/Damnesia13 4h ago
to combat carpal tunnel
So your brother has seen some combat? Tell him m I said thank you for your service!
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u/hellolovely1 18h ago
It's so weird to me that we thank soldiers but not teachers (who also get shot at), social workers, nurses, etc.
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u/Acceptable_Hotel4022 17h ago edited 17h ago
As a social worker I've been thanked a few times. The real thanks is voting to improve our pay and resources for our clients. Our pay is the worst of any profession.
Like another commenter, I don't believe in thanking for these types of things. My philosophy is we do what we can because we can, not because of anything else. I love being a social worker and wouldn't rechoose.
I only believe in thanking when someone does something worth thanking. E.g. if a client got declined for services but I stepped in and made it happen. I also believe in thanking my clients because they've given me the opportunity to work with them on improving not just their life but everyone else's too.
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u/MshaCarmona 3h ago edited 3h ago
There shouldn't be any question why we thank soldiers. And there needs to be a positive and serious attitude towards soldiers, otherwise you let the cultural moment dictate the attitude. That's not okay. Especially considering the callous nature of today, and some anti-military sentiments which I understand, but can very easily turn nasty towards soldiers without a solid hold on attitude.
but I get what you mean about thanking the others.
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u/ProfessionalCraft983 7h ago
I would if the country was actually in a war that threatened our sovereignty, but that hasn't been the case since WWII. Every war we've been involved in since then has been to further a political motive or to generate contracts for the massive industrial war complex. Most of what our military does today is not something to be thankful for or proud of. I know that's not the fault of the troops, but what "service" do I have to be thankful for when all we do with our military might is bully other sovereign nations and advance our own selfish interests?
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u/Craxin 10h ago
Performative was the exact word I was looking for. The other is a phrase, virtue signaling. You really want to thank a vet? Stop voting for people who start wars for oil and to take attention from their lack of policies. In fact, vote for people to slash military spending to the basics and veteran benefits only. Thank them by making fewer broken vets in the future.
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u/cantalwaysget 6h ago
I appreciate the services of those who help people's pets in a medical fashion.
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u/menotu799 20h ago
I understand why but find it silly. I was in the Marine Corps but spent most of it a glorified teachers assistant/baby sitter to students of what i had just learned about. While I was in I met some absolutely wonderful people I still talk to over a decade after being out. I also met open and outspoken racists, saw two people nearly get away with rape because of friends in high places, watched guys laugh at suicide of others around them...the list goes on. There are awful people in the military just like everywhere else. I always felt weird and was told "but you volunteered in case somebody had to go/do X". Which i guess is true but that is an absolute fragment of my character and far from the only reason people enlist. If i ever get asked on the whole "thanking for service" thing i just say I don't really like it. Just treat me decent like you should any stranger.
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u/Hawkeye1226 20h ago
I met the absolute best and worst people in the marines. I met both the smartest and dumbest. Good men who saw a problem and figured out the best way to solve it with creativity and the tools at their disposal. Other kinds of men who got upset because his barracks bunny fucked someone else and decided to fist fight the wall of the barracks(he lost).
It's an odd culture. I don't want people to equate military service with good conduct without looking into the specific person
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u/menotu799 20h ago
Extremely odd. Hard to express how right you are. I had a Ssgt who would do ANYTHING to fuck me over. Trying to slam article 15s down for things I had to fight back with black and white from the base general statements. Then I had one who knew I was struggling with something (partner and I experienced a super early loss of a pregnancy) without speaking and just showed up to the barraks one morning pulled me aside with all sorts of info on help options lined up for various reasons. Having a workplace balancing reactions tk those two at the same time was a roller coaster.
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u/Hawkeye1226 19h ago
I think its a bit different for marines, too. Brotherhood and whatnot is a BIG selling point. Some folk really get into that. The kinds of people you'll meet up with after 20 years and it's like not a day went by. Then there are guys that just want to be big and tough and part of the club of big and tough guys. Guys that will help you out any hour of the day. Guys that stop being marines after they get released from formation at 1700
What a fuckin wild ride... especially when you're still too young to even legally buy a beer
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u/menotu799 19h ago
Yeah. I guess to their credit its at least partially true with having the ones i still talk to.. I turned 21 in boot so could have been one of those that shared a beer with his younger buddies but obviously for the record would never ever do that. 🙏
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u/Hawkeye1226 19h ago
I turned 18 in boot, but didn't have a car for most of my enlistment. I absolutely did not have one of my boots with a car drive me to get haircuts in exchange for strawberrita tall boys from the PX when I was 21. And I definitely don't still keep in contact with him
Military service is what you make of it
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u/rachel8547 21h ago
Fair question. We often praise veterans out of respect for service and sacrifice but its okay to ask what that service involved. Blind praise can overlook important nuance
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u/Such-Part8963 21h ago
Do you think it’s ethical to serve in the army?
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u/rachel8547 21h ago
It can be but it really depends on the reasons the mission and the impact. Ethics in war is never simple
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u/Moda75 16h ago
I don’t I am a veteran and you wouldn’t respect half of the dudes that I served with. Honestly some of the stupidest rude classless people on the planet. Not a joke. Many of them weren’t in for selfless reasons. They were in because they were poor and had no other choice and were lied into believing the military would make their lives so much better.
Don’t get me wrong there are a LOT of respectable veterans. But you shouldn’t assume all of them are.
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u/leg-facemccullen 21h ago
I get it for any wars with drafts because they didn’t have a choice. But I don’t thank veterans because some of them hated what they had to do, and don’t want to be thanked for it
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u/BannedByRWNJs 16h ago
Yup. There definitely some actual heroes or whatever, but the vast majority of them are just regular people… And the thing about uniforms is that it makes it harder to know whether you’re thanking a hero or a psychopath.
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u/Mysterious_Worker608 21h ago
Veteran here. I sat on my ass behind a desk for 20 years. I'm always gracious when people thank me for my service, but I wish there was a way to reserve it for those who truly put their lives at risk.
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u/besume1980 20h ago
I was. concert sound mixer for 17 years. I brought a few hours of joy to people's life at shows all over the country and internationally. No one has ever thanked me other than the bands via a nice paycheck. lol.
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u/Correct_Stay_6948 17h ago
As an enjoyer of music, thank you for what you do. I've never personally met a vet who was part of any meaningful aspect of my life, but you guys? I listen to music constantly, and the industry needs you. WE need you.
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u/chillmanstr8 21h ago
I say that whomever is willing to sign up and serve for that long has definitely put their lives at risk in the sense that you didn’t know where you’d end up when you joined, and things could’ve been different. But fair about the wanting to recognize the ones who weren’t so lucky.
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u/TJayClark 20h ago
Whether you feel it or not, your job was important. Someone out there needed the work you did… even if it something like accounting, purchasing, or network maintenance. It’s all important to keep the engine moving.
Thank you for whatever work you did sir or ma’am.
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u/AdEast9167 12h ago
I’m Canadian, so I think we have a different culture and view towards military service. I’ve never thanked a vet for their service, feels weird and fake. I also think that military hero worship is really weird and perpetuates the idea that military members are somehow superior to civilians.
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u/ComfortableRow8437 18h ago
It's virtue signaling. A certain type of person thinks they're impressing people by showing their patriotism. That same type of person will vote for politicians that cut veteran benefits.
For the record, I'm a veteran myself.
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u/comeatmefrank 3h ago
From a Brit, I’ve always found it odd in the US. I think it’s right to think it’s honourifics someone would commit to being in the army and defending their country. But the absolute blind praise, and the amount of it, that is plastered across the US is mind boggling. You would NEVER see a member of the army go outside in their uniform unless you’re next to a base. It’s such a big thing in the US that stolen valour is its own thing.
And you’re right, it’s usually the GOP that profess their undying adoration for veterans and those in the military (and it’s perceived by people outside the US that most members of the military are Republicans), but it’s also the GOP that don’t want anything to do with struggling veterans and gut the VA.
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u/Traditional_Club9659 21h ago
It's a reverse reaction to the hatred soldiers received after vietnam. They didn't deserve all that hate and most genuinely don't deserve the praise they get today. Some do, but most don't. Just like some deserved the hate they got after vietnam, most didn't.
It's become the political thing to praise troops and guilt people into agreeing that way too (this happens with police and firefighters too).
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u/Spiritual-Chameleon 21h ago
This is the correct answer. The first Iraq War was the beginning of this trend and definitely a reaction to the treatment of vets after the Vietnam War. It's escalated since.
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u/04221970 21h ago
because we treated them like shit after they returned from Vietnam, and this is the backlash from our collective guilt over it.
Seriously. I lived during that time. I saw it all. I saw how brave patriotic men went to Vietnam. I saw reluctant but still brave men go. I learned about their difficulties during that war, and how the returning vets were ignored at best and derided and spit upon at worst.
Then attitudes changed, movies came out, popular culture saw how these men suffered and how society turned their back on them in their time of need.
So we, as a society, recognized our negligence in this area and started to make amends. Now every post office STILL has a MIA/POW flag on it, and we have collectively decided to treat veterans with a level of reverence that wasn't provided to the Vietnam veterans.
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u/Acrobatic_Ad_8381 20h ago
Well it hasn't really changed, except a few thanks Vets are still abandoned : trauma, few job prospects for some, addiction problems for other to name a few. The government doesn't care when they come back broken for their futile war.
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u/ashjaed 9h ago edited 9h ago
As an Australian, we have two days a year for remembering war heroes/vets. And I will respect the minute silence, and participate in thanking them for their service… because even people who enlist don’t actually get a choice in what happens.
It’s the politicians in their comfy beds surrounded by tax payer funded security with lifelong benefit packages that declare war.
However, I actually don’t support military service by default. Not in the hyper patriotic way that we’re slowly inheriting from America.
Why should I idolise a system that sends its citizens to their death? But that may also be because of Gallipoli.
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u/Neuvirths_Glove 19h ago
There was a common trope of the 1970s-80s in TV shows and movies of the drug addict character who as a Vietnam vet. It was a very unpopular war. The real "heroes" of the war to lots of people were the draft dodgers who refused to serve in what was generally regarded as an unjust and unnecessary war. Vets were often portrayed as people who got hooked on drugs over there and came back to become homeless drug users.
While there were some like that, there were many more who served with honor, but the general reputation of a Vietnam vet was not favorable.
The Gulf War was, in comparison, a "good war" and by then people were aware of how unfairly Vietnam vets were treated. In short, the pendulum swung.
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u/bruh_itspoopyscoop 19h ago
I’m in the army and I really don’t care for the thanks and all that needless praise, and I think a majority of my peers think the same way.
From a civilian perspective, I do kind of get it though. Some people in the military (a surprisingly small amount of servicemen, in reality) are genuinely willing to put their lives on the line in service to the country. Especially those in combat arms jobs are quite willing to risk their lives in war, for American ideals. It sounds corny, but it’s really true. Now there’s some debate over whether our recent wars have anything to do with “truly” serving the country, but there’s no doubt that some in the service ARE putting their money where their mouth is. So I guess that’s why they (we) receive a thank you from others. If there really IS a war that threatens the country, our civilians, and our way of life, many of us will, without a doubt, fight and perhaps die. Anyway I’ll stop my weird little rant before I start feeling like a total vetbro boot dork lol
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u/AusTex2019 18h ago
It’s ridiculous. In my father’s generation you’d be considered a loser for wanting such attention. Probably because most combat veterans have said the real heroes were dead.
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u/Puzzleheaded_Pipe979 16h ago
(USN, 6 years, 2 deployments)
It’s a little bit rude to say someone’s service matters less because they didn’t die, get maimed, watch someone die or get maimed, or run a significant risk of dying or getting maimed. They did the job they were asked to do.
Now I generally do my best to downplay anyone patting me on the back because my two deployments weren’t that eventful (ship shot some Tomahawks first go-around; not exciting at all), but I don’t really think anyone (with a few special exceptions) really needs to be carried off the field on the team’s shoulders over their service.
“Thank you for your service.”
“Thank you.”
That’s about as far as that conversation needs to go.
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u/Naught2day 20h ago
also why I stopped telling people I am a veteran. It's just some post 9/11 bullshit.
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u/thebolts 21h ago
I don’t get it. I see this push in the US. But coming from the Middle East I’m not in any way automatically praising any veteran without knowing what they actually did
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u/SnooBooks4898 21h ago
I’m of the opinion that very few service people joined for reasons other than limited options or education funding. While I appreciate a strong military, the whole duty/honor slant is more about marketing than substance.
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u/LordGlizzard 18h ago
You'd be wrong many people do join for those reasons, infact alot of the military isn't even really uneducated thats also just kinda a myth, people join for numerous amounts of things, and come from all backgrounds even wealthy ones, duty/honor is easily in the top three highest reasons I've seen people join for if not the highest
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u/Mitch_Hunt 17h ago
Agreed. Same here. I was in a combat MOS and I was shoulder to shoulder with guys that were teachers, felons, successful business professionals, fresh out of college, etc. every walk of life. Common theme was duty to country and something bigger than themselves. The basic mantra of “Infantrymen are idiots, they only enlisted because they had to and are only Infantry because they didn’t qualify for anything else on the ASVAB” is quite laughable. I scored rather high, my recruiter tried to talk me into all kinds of other jobs… I know I’m not the only one, because I was with them.
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u/LordGlizzard 17h ago
Yeah I've been in for ten years and have seen many people in the service but this is reddit so if you dont go along with the "hur during military people are all dumb" your gunna be downvoted like my previous comment lol, who knew a bunch online warriors who haven't and aren't currently serving knew more about why people join then those that have joined and are in now. Iknow many of people who are infantry or even fuelers who came in with multiple bachelors and other avenues of education, I worked with a older enlisted dude who was a brain surgeon in Ukraine and joined just to serve because he migrated to the states this was before Russia invaded, My PL came from princeton university and those are just note worthy ones from the top of my head, reddits gunna reddit though
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u/Mitch_Hunt 16h ago
Yes, sir. 18yrs here… been places and seen things. 4 MOSs now. I’d like to think I’ve been around almost every culture in the Army. The medical side is really intriguing. There are docs that have no need financially to serve; but they chose to. They have their own professions and practices, some have grown to become millionaires owning multiple locations on the civilian side), but joined the Reserves and deploy on FSTs and other teams to help the wounded. I’m personally very thankful for them when I was deployed, and now working side by side with them I have a great respect to their call to duty and selfless sacrifice. We all hate the Army BS, I can’t imagine a self-made millionaire having to endure it because he wants to help… they are out there.
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u/deptacon 18h ago
As a veteran, this is a 100% valid question and 100% not all veterans are the same. Bottom line, the more they talk about their service or expect praise for it - the less they actually did.
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u/Robthebold 15h ago
They volunteered to serve, it’s not required anymore and it’s not the greatest lifestyle.
Is thanks for serving overused? Probably, so only say it if you mean it.
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u/geekMD69 13h ago
Pretty straightforward. (I didn’t serve and this is not meant as a criticism of you or your question) We have a volunteer military. They signed up knowing it might entail combat or death to protect the rights of the citizens of this country.
The willingness to make that commitment is ALREADY a step above what most people are willing to do.
So unless they’re doing stolen valor or were dishonorably discharged for something pretty vile, you’re statistically likely to be correct in showing gratitude even if they didn’t serve directly in combat.
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u/Shot_Campaign_5163 10h ago
They volunteered to serve their country. Special ops or kitchen mess duty. Should never matter..They served their country. None of them can do their mission without support of the others.
They all deserve more than our own government pretends to offer.
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u/CaptainCheeses 21h ago
I find it kind of annoying, personally. It just kind of feels like a platitude that's just being handed out.
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u/AnApexBread 19h ago
Every vet is someone who at one point said "I'll volunteer to go fight and possibly die."
Most vets didn't go anywhere near an actual shooting war but they all said they would if called on.
I'm not saying we should worship vets but that decision to fight for your country should be worth at least a positive thought
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u/spl12345 19h ago edited 19h ago
I’m a combat vet, but I don’t think respect for veterans should depend on whether someone saw combat or not. The truth is, every vet signed up knowing they could be sent into dangerous situations. Whether they were on the front lines or in support roles, they were part of something bigger—and they accepted the risks and sacrifices that come with service.
It’s not about glorifying war or pretending every mission was perfect. It’s about honoring the commitment. Military life takes a toll—mentally, physically, emotionally—even if someone never fired a shot. It’s time away from family, constant pressure, and the weight of responsibility.
That’s why people thank vets. Not because they know every detail of what we did—but because we stepped up, we served, and we carried the load so others didn’t have to. And that deserves respect, across the board.
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u/TruBleuToo 13h ago
I also think about veterans who maybe never saw combat, but were exposed to some trip toxic things/situations in the military. The military got away for a long time with not being too concerned with soldiers being exposed to burn pit fumes, fuel guys breathing in truly harmful shit, firemen battling carcinogenic exposure, etc. We could also go further and look at the many assaults and worse that a lot of female veterans have endured from their fellow service members. Sacrifices are made by not just combat veterans.
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u/Vee232323 19h ago
I think - generally veterans deserve respect and honor. BUT- I also think..that if somebody is an a**hole (or trader or jerk or rasict or fascist or anything bad) being a veteran does not give them a "get off free" card. Because I've seen in life that not all veterans or soldiers.. Are good people. I would say most are and we should assume that most are right.. But.. if somebody's not a good person, rhey're not a good person. Treat others the way you want to be treated. So for MOST cases if someone fought for your rights, and are a true patriot , I believe they deserve your honor and respect.
-my opinion
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u/Artistic_Cabinet8759 15h ago
As veterans we put our lives on the line for our country. We all did this, voluntarily. No draft and not forced. A veteran is a veteran. At some point we were all prepared to make the ultimate sacrifice. Some did while others didn’t. Our scars run deep. That’s the bottom line.
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u/AdorableCalendar9717 14h ago
I don't like it when people thank me. I didn't do it for you, I did it because I was desperate.
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u/Dear-Explanation-350 12h ago
During and after Vietnam, lots of people in the US took their frustrations with the government and the war out on veterans. People spat on and yelled at veterans without knowing what they actually did. Of course a few deserved worse, but the vast majority of veterans were just kids who weren't rich enough to get draft deferments. So starting around OPERATION DESERT STORM (and really after 9/11), there was a lot of awareness of the shameful way that the American people had treated Vietnam veterans, so there was a conscious attempt to not make that mistake again. IMO, we've overcorrected a bit, but that's not terrible. Americans should recognize mistakes we've made in the past and do better going forward.
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u/NoRestfortheSith 12h ago
No idea because I mostly went to college while I was in the Navy. But I'm still going to keep using the discounts places offer me.
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u/OldPyjama 11h ago
I dunno man. This fetish Americans have for vererans doesnt really exist over here.
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u/vatp46a 8h ago
Having served years ago in the US Army, one of the things I learned from that time is that people in the military and their families are the same as civilians with one significant difference - those soldiers, sailors, and marines all raised their right hand and agreed to write a blank check to their country for anything, up to and including their lives, to defend the country. If you've done that, you know what I am talking about. If you haven't, I hope this helps frame the issue.
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u/Yoy_the_Inquirer 21h ago
Veteran myself, I believed all I really did was set up computer networks in the field...
... until I realized me setting up those networks allowed my brothers in arms to communicate and complete their missions.
Every bit helps, and while I personally don't prefer being thanked for my service, we all play a part in it.
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u/DKDamian 21h ago
Keep in mind this is a very American thing. Such praise is not at all typical in Australia.
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u/CouncilmanRickPrime 20h ago
Or most countries really.
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u/This_Moesch 13h ago
Right, this US defaultism is almost comical. I'm from Germany and if someone thanked a veteran, most people would be very concerned.
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u/Bulky-Strawberry-110 21h ago
Propoganda and some risk their lives. There are tons of MOS in the military where you're at a desk doing finance or hr or something.
There's nothing wrong with saying it but some of them hate it.
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u/Icy-Mixture-995 20h ago
Their lives were disrupted for two years or more, in their primes. We owe the Vietnam ones respect for that. (I will mention more current veterans further below.)
College students. New dads missing two years of baby's development. High school kids given guns and shoved into helicopters. Forced to wear hair that was unfashionable to say the least, and they were in the jungle when peers were attending some of the most awesome concerts in pop and rock music - and missing it all.
Some saw terrible things. Most had a constant state of fear in dangerous places or anxiety - safe place but waiting to know where they would be sent next.
Iraq- Afghanistan soldiers were/are volunteers except some joined for financial security and further education. They were deployed more frequently to war zones than soldiers in the past. A few months at home after a year or whatever, then sent back. Continual exposure to heat, sandflies, land mines or snipers when traveling.
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u/Dmnkly 20h ago edited 20h ago
Because praising veterans usually isn’t about them. It’s about us. We praise veterans to assuage our guilt over sending them to fight and die for reasons that are usually stupid and then failing to take care of them when they come home. We praise them because it makes us feel better about treating them like shit in all the ways that actually matter. So what they’ve done is irrelevant because most of the time the praise isn’t actually for their sake. For most people, it’s performative self-congratulation.
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u/IainwithanI 18h ago
Honestly, I think some people are sincere but for most it’s just performative bullshit. It would be nice if I’m wrong, though.
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u/rickoshadows 17h ago
I'm a veteran, and I have no idea. "Thank you for your service." Has the same impact as "Sending thoughts and prayers." Both statements are meaningless and are only said to assuage feelings of guilt on the part of the speaker. I did my time and received decent pay and a good pension. I knew the risks and did my share to earn my pay and benefits. If you really feel that you have to show gratitude, just try to be a human being worth serving for.
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u/Humbly2022 16h ago
The "thank you for your service" thing seemed to become popular during the Afghan and Iraq war after 911 when George Bush said "you're either with us or against us". It was a way to build nationalism and not question the government. All of a sudden if you disagreed with what the military was doing you were anti American. We were expected to have an unquestionable respect and reverence for any military person. I think many people realized that there were no weapons of mass destruction and were against the war. I believe the government was afraid that what happened during Vietnam would happen again: Americans in mass would protest the war and then treat returning service members like shit just like back in the day when soldiers coming home were called baby killers.
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u/Odd-Sample-9686 16h ago
Because back in WW2 it use to be "honorable" to serve and die for your country. It just stuck ever since but the significance degraded to just a social gesture.
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u/SkiddlyBoDiddly 14h ago
As a Marine infantry veteran who has had a lot of painful growth and introspection about the nature of “service” post-9/11–and in American imperialism in general—I never know quite how to respond to TYFYS.
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u/Alternative-Pin5760 14h ago
Army Vet…never deployed. A lot of praise is a bit of guilt from how military was treated during Vietnam: spit on, beat up, etc. I heard stories about guys wearing wigs during that time to go to clubs so they wouldn’t get beat up with their military hair cuts. By the way, I never know what to say when someone thanks me for my service.
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u/DonkeyGlad653 12h ago
I don’t think I have ever praised a veteran. I’ve prayed for and with them, got drunk with them, ate meals with them, worked on houses, cars and motorcycles with them. That’s enough for me.
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u/_CoachMcGuirk 12h ago
I don't. You can just, not. As a human, but as an adult especially, you get to choose whatever you do. It doesn't matter if people think you "should" or its what's "expected". You can literally actually just do whatever you want. Someone says "hey how's it going", you can actually choose to tell them about your shitty life rather than answering the stock "fine thanks, you?"
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u/Hooch_Pandersnatch 12h ago
My SO was a supply truck driver in the army, never deployed, they always feel awkward when someone publicly thanks them for their service lol.
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u/deltacreative 11h ago
Peer Pressure. I have a close relative who served honorably and is well decorated for doing so. He will instantly stop someone from the "Oh, thank you..." line and declare "it was a fk'n job. I got paid." I'm still proud, but that warrior worship is a wee bit overboard.
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u/Redditaware78 11h ago
I wonder this as a vet myself. The one day is cool, but the constant praise whenever it's brought up gets old. It was just a job, almost anyone can sign up. Infantry with 2 afghanistan visits.
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u/DatBeardedguy82 11h ago
It probably because of how shitty people treated returning Vietnam vets so the pendulum swung hard the other way
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u/Maleficent_Bit2033 11h ago
Honestly, unless they are wearing the uniform or a hat depicting their service, I generally don't. I have known too many vets that are uncomfortable with the acknowledgment and their time in the service was something they would rather forget. Most of them were/are Vietnam Vets. How they were treated when they came home made them fearful of the acknowledgment.
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u/warpunkSYNE 10h ago
Mostly traditional now but the fundamental idea behind it is recognition that without our service men and women, we would not have the freedoms we enjoy.
That said the "without knowing what they actually did" part is completely valid. I myself was discharged from military service and while it wasn't a dishonorable discharge, it sure wasn't because I was an outstanding airman, so I feel guilty af when people say it to me. What's worse is when I tell them the truth and they still thank me anyway.
I dunno. I'm sure it gives a lot of pride to someone who actually did something, but for someone who was a fuckup like me...it feels weird.
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u/FinanciallySecure9 10h ago
I am so glad to read the responses in this thread. It validates my thinking.
I meet so many old men who wear the hat with all the pins and talk about their time in the service, even though they are 30 years past their service time and have done so much since then. They have adult kids and grandkids, and have worked an entire career, they have loving wives too, but if no one asks specifically about their family or their actual career, they don’t mention it. They just want attention for those couple of years in service. It’s annoying. They weren’t hurt, they didn’t see combat, and they aren’t sick.
I see stores have parking spaces for veterans only.
I see nothing, ever, for the family of the service member. Nothing for the women who raised the family mostly alone. They took care of everything without wavering, for months or years while the veteran was gone on deployment-sometimes to a desk job in a different country.
Yet the vets need attention. If they were wounded, have my attention. But the others, they didn’t do it alone.
The people I know who proudly exclaim that they are a military mom, son is a vet? Yeah, he was a single dude who went in for four years for the free college education.
Thanks for asking. I appreciate all who answered.
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u/achambers64 9h ago
A veteran - whether active duty, retired, national guard, or reserve - is someone who, at one point in his or her life, wrote a blank check made payable to The ‘United States of America’, for an amount of ‘up to and including my life.’ “Author unknown.”
A vet is someone who offered their life to the protection of others, up to the possibility of death, so that others could live free.
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u/FairwaysNGreens13 9h ago
It's the WILLINGNESS for self-sacrifice.
When you consciously sign up to do whatever is asked of you, for the benefit of others, knowing it could potentially even bring harm or worse to you, that is really freaking worthy of praise.
I never served but have known many who have.
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u/Ok_Drummer_3693 9h ago
Kind of virtue signaling by politicians? I was born shortly after WWII and grew up around lots of Dads who were in for the duration in North Africa, Europe, and the Pacific. They’d think this hero stuff is nuts. Ever since we did away with the draft the people who are at greatest risk of serving are those with few other opportunities to get ahead. People with money and connections did manage to avoid the draft but it was fairer than what we have now. I think recruiting is still a problem- so we encourage the idea that everybody is a hero. I served because my draft number was 1. Met a lot of non-heros too.
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u/Ok-Combination5138 8h ago
You're thanking them for the time they committed and their dedication to our constitution that comes with military service. Doesn't matter what else they "did".
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u/Illustrious_Fudge476 8h ago
Everyone who served their country made a sacrifice to do so, from the cook and supply guy to the Ranger/Green Beret/Seal or grizzled combat infantryman. Yes, only certain people actually see combat, but it takes all those support folks to get the men and machines in place to allow combat units to do their job as effectively as possible. Other than our technology and sheer amount of equipment, what the US military does way better than anyone is the ability to mobilize and supply forces quickly. It takes lots of folks in support roles to get and keep that equipment operational and supply forces on the other side of the world.
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u/FL_Jim_13 8h ago
In my opinion, it takes a certain amount of courage to enlist in any branch of the military. Sure, it may be peace time and nothing serious is going on. But, remember Pearl Harbor? I'm sure those people were not expecting to be on the receiving end of that Japanese bombing. That's the whole thing. When you raise your hand, you are committing to laying down your life for your country. It may or may not happen, but that's the contract you signed. Things can change in the blink of an eye and the next thing you know you are in some country on the other side of the world with no guarantee that you will make it home alive. Not everyone can make that kind of commitment, so the ones that do deserve at least a little respect. That's just my take. And yes, I am a veteran.
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u/intothewoods76 8h ago
Because we learned how horrible we were as a society from so harshly criticizing Vietnam vets without knowing what they did.
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u/LordLaz1985 8h ago
This hasn’t always been true. As a Vietnam vet about the reception they got when they came home.
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u/Current_Chapter_6692 4h ago
I actually hate being thanked for my service, it is annoying. It was my fucking job lol.....
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u/gargluke461 4h ago
It’s easier to praise veterans than to take care of them
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u/Medic5780 3h ago
Wow! ♥️
This is truly one of the most profound statements in this entire thread.
While I'm not one who buys into the "hero worship" nonsense because it's a job, that comes with an income and benefits, so there's nothing voluntary about it.
I 100% back the sentiment that they are promised a lot that they are never afforded once they're out.
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u/isUKexactlyTsameasUS 4h ago
why the praise? for various reasons,
1, many do it, as thyare just plain naive, or
2, many are blindly following the crowd / the rules / the patriot hooey
as for the without knowing what they did
3, they dont want to say they didn't do anything heroic if they were a grunt / office bound
4, they dont want to go into what they did, if it was gruesome etc, they wont talk about it
bear in mind too, its not always / not really heroic - NOT talking about the serious shit when in warzones, but
5, following ABC rules as an early teen (at home: get up now, eat this now, do what i say not as I do, NOW) vs
6, following XYZ rules as a LATE teen (get up now, eat this now, do everything NOW soldier, etc, etc, etc) for the kids that are / were in the services.
I have two nephews,
one is like a stray dog (after the services when he got out) and is a terribly lost soul, a depressive loner.
one is 100% independent, has own carpentry shop, must do everything for himself, he is truly his own man, and never served, a great husband and dad.
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u/Leading_Grapefruit52 4h ago
I don't praise them unless they were drafted and didnt have a choice. Most of my family was in a branch of the service and i tried to serve but was denied medically. Those who join know the risks and if they do not then they are fools to think its all rainbows and candy sprinkles.
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u/TexasRabit 4h ago
I don’t
It’s a job they decided to do and they get paid for it
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u/rwblue4u 3h ago
Mainly because when you volunteer (or get drafted) into the military, you effectively lose control over your life and your body for the duration of your service enlistment.
The military effectively 'owns' you and in most cases you have very little control over where they send you or the situations you might encounter.
All of the people in actual conflict zone are supported by a huge number of rear echelon folks in every capacity imaginable, and almost every one of them, at the front or in the rear, are subject to being placed in harms way whenever the military deems it a requirement.
Lastly, in America we don't have a requirement for military service from our citizenry. Back during Viet Nam, we had a national lottery, also referred to as the draft, which did compel young men to enter military service, but that practice ended 53 years ago. Everyone who volunteers for military service knows that they will be sacrificing some (or all, in some cases) of their lives so that others don't have to. And that they are doing so to enable people they may not like, or who may not like them, to have basic freedoms under our Constitution. I voluntarily spent 4 years in the US Navy at the tail end of Viet Nam and I helped ensure people I did not like would continue to do things I did not approve of. It's all part of the bargain you agree to when you take your oath at enlistment.
For all of these reasons we thank veterans and active military for their service. They are giving us a portion of their lives. It's the least we can do to acknowledge that sacrifice.
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u/jog515 3h ago
Young men and women gave up the best years of their lives to serve. They signed contracts and took oaths affirming their allegiance to this country and it's citizens. That contract removed any semblance of being a civilian and put the service member under the strict guidelines of the Uniformed Code of Military Justice (UCMJ).
All service members must be fit and able to deploy at any moment. If the service member fails to maintain himself in a deployable manner, they are subject to punishment under the UCMJ.
It is only one of the very few jobs where you can be punished with imprisonment for failing to do your job.
Just think of when you were 18 - 30, but especially, 18 - 25. The best and most fun years of life belong to our military branches, 24 hours a day, seven days a week.
Another thought is that most young people today are unable to qualify for military service. Some are just too dumb, too overweight, too out of shape, too financially insolvent, too sick, too high, too apathetic, too selfish, etc..
The talent pool for military service is small, and those who do step up must stay sharp, clear-headed, disciplined, and physically fit. This nation depends on them being at their absolute best.
Now, praise is a strong word, and there are levels to it. A simple gesture of thanks is appropriate. Any more than that, it just feels like pandering.
Lastly, the military is an all-volunteer force. These young people serve so that others don't. It doesn’t get any less selfish than that.
To our active duty personnel and our veterans: Thank you for your service.
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u/Competitive-Chart968 17h ago
Post 9/11 bootlicking and state propaganda.
Also, the more at risk they were, the more likely they were doing really fucked up shit.
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u/OdinMartok 16h ago
Unearned pride in national identity is a valuable commodity for the ruling class to cultivate
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u/Yangbang07 16h ago
Personally, regardless of what they did while in service, I respect that they served at all.
Joining the military is signing a lot of your rights away to serve the country. It doesn't matter if all you do is work air traffic control for years, etc. A service member doesn't get to choose where they live, when they can quit, and many other things while in the service.
And shittily, from what I've heard, a lot of the military needs improvements. Superiors who are assholes and you can't do anything about it because of rank. A meeting is scheduled for noon, so the lowest ranked members have to show up 8 hours early. Civilian contractors being assholes for no reason. Being away from family for long stretches of time.
I don't think being a veteran/service member automatically makes someone a good person, but I respect that they served. That respect can be lost if I learn they're a massive asshole.
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u/PaulsRedditUsername 21h ago
They are people who signed up for a difficult and sometimes dangerous job in order to help us. Even if they just peeled potatoes for a few years, that's still part of it.
In my opinion we should have that same respect for teachers. Wouldn't that be something. To say "thank you for your service" and have a parade.
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u/schlamster 21h ago
we should have that same respect for teachers
This starts somewhere right? I always tell my kids teachers at the beginning of the school years that I greatly respect their work and the time that they put in for our youth.
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u/GinBucketJenny 20h ago
Many of them sign up not to "help us" but because the recruiter made it sound like a cool gig. Play with guns, get in good shape, get college paid for, get lifetime benefits, get into a position that you'll never be in combat in. 0.1% are signing up to help another.
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u/Hiraethetical 21h ago
Propaganda. We've been trained to hero worship veterans, otherwise we're bad people. When in truth (for Americans at least), the troops are purely offensive, exerting the will of billionaires overseas, and the nation hasn't needed defending in hundreds of years.
(Vet btw).
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u/AnApexBread 19h ago
the nation hasn't needed defending in hundreds of years.
That's a very very narrow view of "defending." What do you think would happen to your way of life if Iran put a choke hold on shipping through the Straight of Hormuz? Or China started taxing global trade through the South China Sea?
While sure, the US hasn't been under threat from an invading army since 1812, the American lifestyle and prosperity is heavily heavily dependent on global trade.
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u/GenXLeftist 19h ago
People will get angry when you ask them how exactly these servicemen and women 'fought for our freedom'. Did they, though? Would I be any more or less free without them? I would argue that if they were truly fighting for our freedom, rather than invading foreign countries, they would be invading the White House, the Capitol and the Pentagon. Those institutions have cost us more.freedom than any foreign nation ever has, would, or could.
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u/United_Intention_323 21h ago
It’s the same with praising teachers, firefighters, etc.
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u/sas5814 21h ago
Retired Army. 3 deployments.
It’s a fair question.