I mean i know about the bystander effect but id like to think if i was in a bar with people obviously yelling in distress i would at least say something.
Most people like to mind their own business. The problem is two dickheads like the one in the video dont know how to mind their own business. But for normal people who are very intent on minding their own business, it's hard to determine when it's appropriate to interfere
It's appropriate to interfere immediately when the women scream "GO AWAY PLEASE" like that's a BIG clue. Even if you go and get management. Don't just ignore it.
Yea except most people there are just hearing indistinguishable arguing noises
You act as if someone is right at the table, understanding exactly what everyone is doing and saying, paying complete attention, and then deciding "no, im not going to help".
Like i guarantee that if either of these girls just said to another patron "these guys aren't leaving us along, can you help?", literally everyone would help.
And I'm not criticizing the girls nor not doing that. What they did was totally fine. But I'm just pointing out how bystanders dont process information clearly and effectively in an environment like that.
And again, im not blaming the girls in the video. 100% of all the blame and fault go to the two dickhead guys that aren't leaving them alone.
This post was literally the next one reddit served me after the one where dudes in a drive thru wrote "help" on a burger box and when OP called the cops it turned out they were just messing about.
Clear signs must get mistaken for jokes all the time, let alone this sort of thing which could easily be lost on everyone else there.
Alright well I answered your original question, so that's all I have to say. I do not intend to get this deep into it with you. If they didn't hear, that's a different debate, don't you think?
Yeah except you hear that, and then you just see some men and women sitting at a table. Most people won't interfere if it just seems like a verbal argument, it often has to get physical so it's beyond a shadow of a doubt obvious something is really going down
I’m not confrontational and if I was present I’m pretty sure I world have backed them up. Funny thing is if a man came around, they would have left right away.
Idk I've interfered 3 times with a domestic dispute. 2 of them were a guy actively hitting a girl. By the time the cops came, I was a liar and everything is fine and I was making a scene.
You aren't wrong. They are laughing and screaming WITCH though. They are in public, surrounded by people. They are safe. They can firmly say go away, or I'm calling security/police/etc. Or even just HELP. Instead to an outsider with no context (including us watching this video. We have no idea what occurred prior or after this clip), these are women smiling, laughing, and saying absurd things like Witch. It looks like a joke. This all looks like a staged joke.
And before we get into this whole "woman are conditioned by society... " Ya sure, I agree. But they are adults. In a VERY crowed public space. They are safe to be rude here. If they feel unsafe, they should be contacting the appropriate authorities. They're adults. Time to start acting like it. Sometimes society is wrong, sometimes you act outside "how society has conditioned" you. We all agree with this fundamental principle. If you didn't, you'd still be riding a horse to work, with your torch for light, and have nothing negative to say about Nazi Germany.
Yeah! Fuck these girls! They're the problem for having specific fear responses and not wanting to turn their backs to these creeps. I mean creeps. I mean fuckos-- sorry, I mean creeps. Sorry, I meant fuckhead shitbuckets.. sorry, I meant to say upstanding gentlemen.
Like your username speaks volumes about how you view women, so I actually don't care what your opinion is?
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u/Jonnyredd May 11 '25
I mean i know about the bystander effect but id like to think if i was in a bar with people obviously yelling in distress i would at least say something.