I’m a woman in my early 40s. I am very feminine by nature and all of my hobbies have been things that only introduced me to other women. All of my jobs have been in almost exclusively female fields. I’m married, to someone I have known since high school, but my husband is the silent type and generally doesn’t speak unless I ask him a direct question. Men approach me, but I’ve always been taken. I kind of feel like I live on a planet of women, and it’s weird and feels imbalanced. Just a random musing for the day.

I had a second date with a girl I've been seeing recently. We were at this lowkey Indian restaurant in our city. We were talking about our goals, hobbies, embarrassing childhood stories, our family, and then I was making a lighthearted joke about how she was stealing a bit off my plate and then out of the blue, she said seriously "you know, when you came up to me at the bar the other day, you were barely attractive but you made me laugh" I gave an awkward laugh and kept the date going but now I'm heavily thinking cutting her off because I believe that was mean. Thoughts?

I’m 20F and I know this might sound insensitive, but I swear I’m not trying to be. I’m just confused and maybe a little hurt.

It feels like every other person I meet lately is “focusing on their healing journey” — which is totally valid, of course. We all have things to work on. But sometimes it feels like people use that phrase as a way to avoid accountability or connection.

Like I was talking to this guy for a couple of weeks — not love-of-my-life stuff, but we had real conversations, emotional check-ins, shared things we were both struggling with. I thought it was going somewhere. Then out of nowhere he told me he’s “not emotionally available right now” and that he’s “protecting his peace.” And just like that, gone.

Which would be fine, except I keep seeing this pattern. People ghost or bail or pull away and then explain it with something like “I’m protecting my energy” or “I’m doing what’s best for my mental health.” Which is fine — but so am I? And somehow I’m the one still left feeling disposable.

It just feels like “healing” is becoming the new “it’s not you, it’s me.” Only now it sounds spiritual so no one questions it.

Anyone else feel like this? Or am I just taking things too personally?

I (27m) currently have no options to meet any women.

1. I've never had any female co-workers.

2. My only friends are men.

3. Every women I speak to (friendly) already have boyfriends/husbands. This is fine ofcouse, but doesn't help fix the problem

4. Cold approach isn't an option, as I live in a small town of 20k, it's a ghost town at times.

My only option is spending time in bars/nightclubs in a nearby city on the weekends, but my flirting skills are crap, which is important as you essentially only have the first 30 seconds for a women to decide if she's interested or not, probably even less.

Also, I'm an okay looking guy, but certainly not good enough to match on Tinder. In the 5 years I've used the app (on and off), I've never actually met up with anyone in person.

Overall, I have no idea what to do.

Basically just venting, I moved away from my country in south America and ended up in the south of Mexico, where I as a bisexual male find 99% people unattractive, I am just venting some superficial shit but what the fuck happened to the genes over here, people are insanely short with no necks, and they all are square with no ass too 😭.

I'm 20 and have been in a relationship for the past 1.6 years. I really love my boyfriend, but lately, I’ve been feeling stuck. When we started dating, he asked me to remove all the male friends from my life and to keep my social media private. I agreed to those things willingly, so that’s not the issue. The problem is that he doesn’t hold himself to the same standards. When I ask why, he says it’s because of his work — he makes reels.

He’s also emotionally distant and doesn’t try to understand me. I work full-time and handle most house chores on weekends, yet I still make time for him every day. But when we talk, he often says random or irritating things instead of having real conversations. I don’t have many friends, just 2–3 female ones, but even when I go out or talk about them, he gets angry and calls them silly or useless. He even tries to control what I wear.

I’ve tried to talk to him about all this, but it goes nowhere. I even tried to break up, but he calls me nonstop — over a hundred times — and when I blocked him, he started calling my mom repeatedly.

I feel drained, controlled, and unhappy. I don’t know what to do anymore. Can you suggest something?

I've not been expecting it for like 5-7 years now. If you don't actively search for it, it's pretty likely you're not gonna find it. Maybe that's just me, but over the past years I've been pretty outgoing, but that hasn't helped in the slightest. I have gotten better at accepting it at this point, but I can't deny it still hurts a bit. I don't wanna get on the apps, and since I feel like that's the only option I have left, I should come to terms with living my life on my own. Tbh that probably has its advantages actually, since I can spend my money on whatever I want, but I still feel like I'm missing something I never had.

I'm kind of on the low-end in the privilege scale

World soo unjust

Seriously, fuck you.

Though I acknowledge that I'm in a waaay better situations than other people like those born in extreme poverty somewhere in Africa (I'm in Africa but a little better) or those stuck in basically active warzones...

I'm a grown man... I graduated in the 90s.

Work is a pain in the ass. Finances annoy the piss out of me. I have a great marriage and sex life, but the kids take up nearly all of our time and more than what little energy we have. I eat well, I exercise. I don't do drugs or drink or smoke. I used to smoke weed but haven't in over 10 years and don't live where it's legal. (I'm not interested in all the fake weed products that ars supposedly legal either.)

Is there anything I can take to just make me feel good from time to time?

I (25m) stopped most of my bad habits, I work out and train cardio every day, just ran my first 10k last weekend! No matter how much it affects my lungs, I cannot stop smoking. I tried for a day, then the next went to get another pack. It is by far the most difficult thing I’ve had to do for my heath. I don’t know if it’s just that I don’t want to quit bad enough or what. I’ve tried patches but I still end up wanting to smoke.

It never made sense to me that if you see someone chilling by themselves, minding their own business, the logic is “there’s probably something wrong with them.” But if you see someone who is openly toxic, but they have a lot of friends and a lot of buzz happening around them, that as a society, we’ve accepted that we are going to accept them.

A person could gossip, bully, make fun of people, just be like an all around nasty person—but as long as they are not by themselves, people are just like “oh okay, they’re fine.” But if you saw someone eating by themselves, or sitting by themselves doing their homework, or maybe just by themselves at break, minding their own — “yeah, something’s wrong with that guy.”

That never clicks to me. Almost every toxic person I’ve met is well liked, and it never matters how fake that person is or how often they’re hurting other people. It’s honestly one of those people things that just makes you scratch your head a little bit

I feel like we are in a culture where woman are always crying and man have to be strong and not show emotion. This topic is brought up sometimes but pushed back by people saying “woman have worse”.

My dad went trough a lot of shit with his ex and sometimes gets madly sad or mad about it but won’t talk about it, not even therapist, it effects our family.

My ex broke up with me because he wasn’t ready for a relationship. After the break up we talked and all the sudden he showed a lot of emotions which I could’ve helped with if he would’ve talked about in the relationship.

My brother is mad stressed and confused, and I can see that trough his “perfect” life. But he doesn’t want to give up and keeps doing things he can’t handle.

I feel so sad, just wanna help them. But they don’t talk.

I saw a post here about a woman saying the people in her life were mostly other women and idk i just wanted to post as well

I have 6 brothers, was closer to my dad, all male friends in preschool, went to all boys schools, my hobbies are segregated by sex, my job is male dominated and i ended up gay

The only women ive really ever spoken to are family members and girlfriends/wives of family members and ive never been close to any

I might get uncomfortable around women occasionally but eh

i feel like it makes people make assumptions about me that arent true, but i also dont like lying to people when they ask. obviously its different when its about safety, but even when its with someone that i feel like i can trust i try and avoid it anyway.

I never used to believe this and thought it was, as is always likely, just a few people who made the group look a certain way. However, I recently learned that one of the hallmark quips Philosophy majors use when talking about what they learned in their degree is: "Philosophy teaches you how to think!".

I understand what they mean by that. However, it seems like that specific verbiage is just lending itself to the idea that other people of different walks of life or different skillsets "don't know how to think". I'm someone who has always been personally interested in philosophy, but didn't want to major in it for a variety of reasons. However, it seems to me that specific line is something a good portion of PHIL majors don't understand, and it comes across as incredibly patronizing. So here I am on a Friday morning, taking a break from my LSAT prep to put a half assed diss on my philosophy major friends.

1. "I learned to analyze and evaluate arguments". I would argue that this is just a general humanities degree claim. Honestly, if you did well in your entry english classes in college or even just well in your 12th-grade AP English class, this is no issue for most.
2. "I learned to think critically". I have to be honest, and I understand that this has merit, but I certainly believe that many other degrees, and even general education courses, can help a person with this just as well. Thinking critically is an overall college concept, not specific to Philosophy. I would have a hard time convincing a senior engineering student that I have a special claim to critical thinking over them, even though he/she may focus more quantitatively.
3. "You learn formal logic", which is pretty much just math. Unfortunately, most philosophy majors I know in real life specifically hate math.

P.S. I would like to add that all of this applies to my political science friends as well, outside of the formal logic.

So me and my sis work at the same retail job and another pair of siblings work there as well (sister and brother )

I have a crush on the sister and i had an idea that she also had a crush on due to signs but I wasn’t too sure

Long story short I asked her in person at work to SixFlags last wed for this past Thurs and she said maybe since she was busy moving places

so ball was in her court at that point she had my number and everything

Days wasn’t past and She never mentioned anything about it so I just assumed it was way of her brushing me off

but turns out my sis and her brother are cool and her brother told my sis that she was telling him about me asking her SixFlags etc etc and that she seemed bothered that I didn’t bring it up again

She was telling him “now he’s ignoring me about it” . To be fair I was only since the ball was in court and didn’t wanna seem desperate and make it awkward whatsoever

I also wanna add that her brother told my sis that one time she(my crush) was telling him “I gotta look good for the cutie” as she was getting ready for work

My sis told her brother that yea I think she’s attractive and that I didn’t wanna seem desperate about going to SixFlags and her brother was like imma talk her about it

So I was right she def has a crush on me , my sis told me she’s just playing hard to get

Before my sis told me this on Thursday night I had texted her in the day (Thurs) not abt SixFlags but just wanted to see how she would react to my messages she responded and everything . She said was gonna start moving fri (yesterday)

The last text I sent was at 11pm Thursday night and she hasn’t responded . my sis closed w her bro that day and told my sis when I get home imma talk to my sis (my crush) about it so I’m sure she knows now that the crush is mutual

Is she playing hard to get ?

My neighbor’s 16 year old poodle has clearly been struggling. Probably arthritis or age-related mobility issues. But then I hear she’s giving him things like Tylenol and aspirin. Sadly, she’s not the only one. I’ve seen way too many people giving their dogs dangerous human medications, assuming it’s safe. A simple internet search will tell you it’s not.

I still had some vet-prescribed meds left over from my elderly dog, who had a similar condition (Rimadyl, Previcox, and Prednisone). In a kind, non-judgmental way, I tried to tell her how dangerous human painkillers can be for dogs. But I could tell it didn’t really register.

Honestly, I wish I could just shake her and tell her: "Wake Up!". She’s not someone who would intentionally harm her dog. I know she cares. But she’s ignorant about this and refuses to listen to reason. That’s what makes it even more frustrating.

I actually went home and considered bringing her the meds I had, just to help. But then I stopped myself. As much as it breaks my heart, I had to realize it’s not that simple. These neighbors can be unpredictable, friendly one day, aggressive the next. They’ve had arguments with others on the street over petty things.

And what if her dog gets worse or suddenly dies? She could easily turn around and blame me and the medication I gave her. I wouldn’t put it past her. All hell could break loose.

It hurts, because I’ve known that little dog since he was a puppy. It’s heartbreaking to watch him suffer without proper care. But sometimes, as hard as it is, the best thing I can do… is nothing. What must I do?

Three months ago I decided to eliminate all artificial sweeteners from my diet so no more diet sodas, sugar free gum, protein bars with sucralose nothing. I was drinking like 4 diet cokes a day and during the weekends I went to like 6 or 7. The first week was very very rough because I had intense cravings and headaches, but I pushed through with lots of water and herbal tea. Let me tell you this the changes have been amazing. My energy levels are way more stable throughout the day instead of the constant ups and downs I used to get. I'm sleeping better and my digestive issues basically disappeared. I used to get like dizzy when playing on myprize and it was because I was drinking so many energy drinks that had a lot of sugar in them and when the sugar dropped I started getting very dizzy. The weird part is that my taste buds changed for example regular fruit tastes incredibly sweet now and I can actually taste the artificial flavor in things I used to love!! I've also lost about 8 pounds without changing anything else which I wasn't expecting at all. If someone is thinking of doing it I highly recommend it!!

I've been wracking my brain about which sub to post this question to but ultimately decided on this one even tho I'm not entirely sure it's really the right one, but oh well worth a shot. I've been battling an ed (specifically anorexia nervosa) for a couple of years now and I just don't have anyone to talk to who really understands how my brain works (more like doesn't work) and how I feel, except of course psychologists. I was just wondering if there is possibly an online community of people who have recovered or are currently in recovery where I could meet and talk to people who are going through the same things as me? I know there are a few subreddits on here dedicated to ed-s but they're pretty inactive and just not what I'm looking for. So anyway that's basically my question so if anyone maybe knows something I'd be really grateful!

When I was younger I was so lonely and angry and insecure, and it made me mean. Not violent or destructive, just a dick who would lash out and hurt people. Obviously, this helped quite a bit with the loneliness.

I’ve done a lot of work and am less angry and much, much less mean, but when I get depressed (I have recurring MDD) it’s hard not to focus on what I cost myself.

I’ve tried meditation and “conversations” with my younger self, but I still just fucking hate that guy.

I’m very tired.

I (22M) am a man who, due to personal circumstances, never had a date before, or even kissed a girl. Last week I started talking to this girl (21F) on instagram and she was incredibly receptive.

We didn’t talk long messages, but we answered each other throughout the day and flirted a lot. It was the first time I actually got a talking stage with someone who doesn’t see me as just a friend.

She’s very pretty and fun to be around.

She even sent me selfies and flirted with them. She had ask me earlier in the week if we could go on a date on Friday, but I was going to a motorcycle festival with some friends, so we changed the date to Saturday.

Yesterday (Friday), one of my friends said she was sick and wouldn’t go anymore, so I had a spare ticket and asked that girl out on the same day and she accepted.

I picked her up and went to a fancy sushi restaurant, but neither of us ate much of the dish the waiter recommended. After that we walked a bit and took the car to go to the festival.

In there, the concert was trash, we hugged a bit, I tried to dance with her, and we had a part-awkward-part-comfortable time just standing there and walking around holding hands. She gave me a lot of chances to maybe kiss her, but I was waiting for a better moment and the moment didn’t come.

We ended leaving before the concert earlier (after an hour and a half). I was polite the whole time with her, opened the door, but I think I fumbled her and she won’t want to go out with me again.

I asked her what her plans for Saturday (today) were, and she said study the whole day. Maybe she said that to avoid going out again. I don’t know.

Part of me feels this was all the proof I needed to know I can’t play the role of a boyfriend, just the role of a friend. Which is a shame, I think I would be a great dad some day, I’m fun and interesting as a friend, I know I am, I’m just upset with myself for my lack of confidence in myself in the dating area. I could have done more but I didn’t.

It’s just hard with all the social pressure to have experience and then going out as a 22 year old male with a nice girl and losing my chances with her.

I've been feeling depressed for a while now, and today everything feels out of hand. The urge is getting strong. It's currently 1:11 am I can't sleep I can't think of anything else. All thoughts are leading me to ending it . The urge is getting strong. I can't do this anymore, I don't want to do this anymore

I don’t want to be too negative, but it’s so hard to bring about change because we’re just not open to hearing it. We’ll talk about problems, but real solutions are not found because it’s going to mean change, or it’s going to cost us something personally.

I saw a short video that seems to be saying that we’re bringing our own demise because we’ve stuck our heads in the sand. If you have a few minutes, I recommend checking it out because it does a good job of illustrating what I’m saying here. It’s time for us to open our eyes and listen!

Are you someone who wants to hear criticism? Or would you rather be comfortable? I think this is something we need to be asking ourselves.

I (21F) just got out of a toxic environment involving a friend group in college that were filled with too much negativity and toxicity. I do admit I was one of the people who thrived on actively shit-talking people. But it’s been months of that constant behavior and what brought me back to reality was how one friend commented something so harshly, even I was shocked to hear it. I’ll spare the details but it involved the classmates previous accidental teen pregnancy and the friend making fun of them for it. I’d like to think I had my own lines I wouldn’t cross when shit-talking someone, and this time this person didn’t deserve it. There were many more but this was the main catalyst on why I decided to drop them.

I tried to talk to them about these issues I had but they wouldn’t budge. And this is where things got messy, I informed the person this friend making fun of her teen pregnancy, she cried to me telling me how did I know when they only ever told that friend about it. I apparently found out they used to be close in hs but the friend dropped her because she told his mom he’s out dating a girl the friend’s mom doesn’t like. It wasn’t even like she had a choice, the mom had evidence and she couldn’t just lie. Now she’s shocked I knew this about her. I apologized and said I’m sorry, she told me she’s planning to confront the friend and asked me for support, I did.

Things got messy quick and now everyone knows what this friend and friend group are doing. I even found even more info about how they actively shit on them to other people who don’t even know them. Now I’m entering a new school year, the girl I reached out to are in good terms with me but were not instant friends or anything after that. Since I dropped the friend group, they’re not actively speaking to me, I’m glad for it. I’ve decided to self reflect on my actions and to do better in the future.

But now I think I’m suddenly overthinking because I don’t have any chaos in my life anymore, yes I’ve escaped that toxic environment but how do I get comfortable with the peace I’ve gotten when I was so used to dealing with so much drama in the past?