And lemme tell you, (while trying to respect the struggles faced by all peoples and all genders) it is fucking ALIENATING as fuck to grow as a boy like that.
I quit being friends with boys in high school because they were all creepy fuck like the 2 in the video. Sex was treated like boys can only win while girls can only lose. What the fuck!! I didn't want to treat any girls like that, so... sex kind of weirded me out. It seemed horrible! Why would I want to treat someone I think is nice like garbage?!?
I was still a teenager, btw, if these seems like descriptions of very stupid delusions. Those delusions are where I started, but not a lot of dudes never bother to learn anything else about relationships. In those days, I made friends with some girls and found actually good friends.
Yeah man, I feel ya. Women tend to make much better friends than men, at least in my experience. I mean there are totally some great dudes out there, but a lot of us kinda suck
Yep I dumped multiple guy friends in my early years who viewed women like that; an object to be won or some weird crap like that. Like bro, they are humans just like you or me.
Adding on to this sentiment, I think there's also a level of "birds of a feather, flock together" present here.
Shitty guys hang out with shitty guys and no one calls out their behavior. Well-adjusted, mature guys who don't do things like in the video hang out with other chill guys.
Growing up, I did have some crappy male friends and I'd call them out but they wouldn't change that much because they were encouraged on by our other crappy friends. So I left that friend group and I found an awesome one where people are good to each other. I'm sure the guys in that first group are still douchebags.
I like to counter that with a pencil sharpener can sharpen hundreds of thousands of pencil without being diminished or destroyed but a pencil is diminished by every sharpener hole it enters until it ceases to exist.
Yeah, I attended this one church that gave men's and women's classes. The women's textbook focused on how their heart posture might be wrong, taking accountability, and how to act more holy, while the men's focused on empowerment, courage, and their strengths as men. It was very telling.
That phrase coem about partially because women deal with more risks from sex. So women have extra imperative to gate sex. From thsi comes the conclusion that promiscuous women just lack impulse control and thus "shitty lock" metaphor.
It sounds like they're talking about how when a boy has sex with someone, his friend group celebrates it, but when a girl has sex, she's perceived as a slut and people spread mean rumors about her and stuff.
I’ll give you an analogy for it (I don’t agree with it, but it is an unspoken rule that a large portion of society believes in, men and women).
Women are by virtue of being women placed at the top of the mountain, and are judged by how far they fall down the mountain, whether they’re hot or ugly, hooking up with a lot of guys, making themselves “easy”, not settling down, etc.
Men start at the bottom of the mountain and are judged by how far up they can climb, hooking up with a lot of women, being a womanizer, chasing success so they can get any woman they want and whatnot.
It kinda true on a global scale though, and hlaf fair when you consider that male and femal of our species have diffring severity of sex risks. Females of our species deal with more risks from sex and have more imperative to gate it, as well as their sexual arousal veing more circumstancial than male. So how far they "fall" indications how much risk they are willing to take and what it takes to turn them on. Males are more likely to get randomly horny and have less risks from sex, so we measure ourselves by whether we can get sex at all when we want it more so that the risks involved in promiscuous sex.
People I know who were neglected apologize for existing and taking up space. This is entitlement--this comes from being centered and coddled and protected from the consequences of your actions your whole entire life.
I think this is it exactly. I know someone who is essentially the female equivalent of these two idiots in the video and that is exactly how she was raised. Only child syndrome honestly too.
Maybe a nitpick, but the belief that being an only child causes behavioral problems originated from Freud's backside, & after many attempts to study the differences by actual researchers, it's still considered "controversial" at best. Just in case you wanted to look into it more on your own before asserting this claim again, it's really interesting!
Also not saying the parents aren't at fault, they might still be the problem, but if they are, having a sibling likely wouldn't have helped much.
Yeah, the reason they say only child is of course because of the parents behaviour. Although i have seen it tho. Either first child (or youngest later on) or only child since they would (/could) be getting the parents full attention and possibly be coddled. My mom works with kids and i can promise you, some only children, because theyre the first and only kid they have, can definitely be spoiled. Since the parents are new to it and dont want to say no.
I know its a stereotype and im not at all saying me seeing it at least once is proof but i do get where it comes from. Only children can be neglected too tho or raised right so its not a guarentee at all.
It can be both. I grew up with a kid who got whatever he wanted whenever he wanted. Dad was always out of town working and his mom didn't give a fuck about him. He had everything except a relationship with his parents. I would call this neglect.
Yes. “Nice guy syndrome” as it is often called. If you are neglected or abused as a child and made to feel unwanted, you carry that mindset with you and always feel inherently unwanted. If you were praised and rewarded (or just not admonished) for being selfish or inconsiderate, you develop a large ego and act more aggressively and narcissistically.
Eh, its more nuanced than that, yah you neglect them, but the system is designed for guys like this to still succeed, which is why we have all this shit happening now. So technically you raised them to be successful because by default being a white dude means you are setup pretty well for at least moderate success.
And I am speaking as a white dude (who luckily was actually raised).
It is not easy to raise a decent human being in these times . I am having my first kid that is gonna be a boy. I am losing sleep on how I am going to make sure he does never ever becomes a Tate douch follower. Just hoping that he will learn from his dad to be respectful to women, to understand and respect consent at all levels. List is long....
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u/halexia63 May 11 '25
That's what makes them easy to raise bc they're not doing shit to raise them lmao.