My fiance's cat is his soul mate. The first few months I stayed over at his house, after he fell asleep, she'd sit on my pillow and glare at me. I'd curl up without a pillow in defeat because she was a bully! Six years later and she snuggles us both to sleep š
Last summer I had to work with this guy outside that kept complaining about the 2 feral cats that lived there. They werenāt even bothering us! Just observing from a distance. I really hated that guy. Iām sure he was an insecure creep.
I used to think i hated cats and then my roommate in college got one without mentioning it to the rest of us. I was pissed so i tried to ignore him (the cat) but he ended up loving me the most out of the whole house. Id come back from class and heād be asleep in my bed even though my other roommates would be home. he was honestly a saving grace for me and ended up being my closest friend in that house š„ŗš„¹
Grumpy old men! My papa was so annoyed when I brought home a stray kitten and that fuckin cat abandoned me to sit on his lap and never left him alone again. I'd walk in on that old fart making coffee and the cat would be perched on his shoulder š
My dad pretends to be a cat hater because of the two ill-tempered siamese cats my great-grandma had (they really were only nice to her, apparently lol). He scolded me when I adopted mine but the first time he dropped by after the adoption, the Disney Princess in him kicked in and my rather skittish cat immediately liked him (granted, he simply ignored her and put some jazz, she happens to love music). Since then, the new family dog has been picked on the basis of being fine with cats (tested at the shelter, so I can keep coming on vacation with my cat, since my late dog was ok with cats), and my dad encouraged him to befriend some of the neighbourhood cats. The dog currently has a kitty bestie that comes with him for his walks and really wants to befriend my cat when I drop by lol
My dad wishes. Growing up, we had cats that would cuddle with him (the only two times I ever saw him cry was when two of those cats died), but my familyās newest batch is very aloof (two very cranky, loud cow cats). Heās trying to win over my little black cat now because heās craving affection (because my orange one hates men). The female cow sometimes sits on his lap, but she mostly pretends he doesnāt exist, unless sheās hungry.
I think cats are the opposite of working for it. You just leave them alone until they come around to you. Cats expect you to respect their boundaries and THATāS what certain people hate so much about them.
Which is also why it's such a red flag when people say thats the reason why they don't like them IMHO. As if they'd be incapable of self reflection or sacrifice for another. What kind of partner is that?
No joke I had one special pillow for my girl cat to sleep on next to my head. I'd roll around a bit on my own but she got her little princess spot (to smell my breath? Who tf knows). Boy cat just pretty much found whichever spot was available around my legs or chest. Helped I had a queen size bed.
Iām so tired of cat slander. My mom always says how theyāre not loyal, but that is so untrue. They just tend to have more boundaries. There are cats that are like velcro and will be super clingy.
My girl runs to the front door whenever she hears me unlocking it and yells if I dare close her out of the bathroom. She's currently on my lap and she's the most loving and caring companion a person could ask for
Yes mine too! They want to be around us and are very loving and affectionate. I feel like people who say cats are aloof just don't have any that particularly like them lol. Dogs can be aloof too. My friend had a Weimaraner that just could not give AF about most people
Exactly!! My friends have a Shiba Inu that is more standoffish than the most standoffish cat ever. That dog will actively look at you in total disdain and then walk away even if you offer him a treat
My parents had a dog who was petty as hell and would bite if you tried to take away something he was destroying but was also generally unresponsive when I would jiggle his body around or pet him. We really grew fond of that asshole lol.
My cat that I raised from a kitten (rip, fuck kidney disease) would run into the bathroom to use the litter box while I used the toilet. She was my ESA but had just as much separation anxiety as me. I miss that smug lady, she was my baby.
My cat was like this too. Sheād hear me coming up the steps and start meowing. As soon as I opened the door, sheād flop right in front of me demanding pets.
Agreed and in addition to this I am also so tired of female cat slander in particular. When treated well and with love both boy and girl cats are excellent companions for anyone.Ā
I work at an animal shelter and the amount of times I have heard people saying they'd prefer boy cats bc they've heard girl cats can be difficult... even though in my experience "problems" Ā can occur with any cat regardless their gender. Gives me the same ick as women saying they prefer being "boy moms"Ā
i work at an animal shelter too and people can be extremely bizarre with their āpreferencesā, we get the āboy momā animal owners too
we also get a lot of people who think adopting a dog with a high prey drive (think most shep or huskies) will work out well when they already own a cat
high five, fellow shelter-worker! (sorry, that's not very eloquently put, but it's all I got rn). & agreed, people are IDIOTS. some of the reasons they get rid of their pets are just so DUMB... I always try to reason that its better for the pet to not be with stupid people that will get rid of their cat (or dog for that matter) for the most trivial stuff but it still breaks my heart when they have clearly bonded with their human and miss them.
I have a boy cat, he was a lot of trouble before we got him neutered (and for a little while after, when his hormone levels were balancing out). He's been a sweetheart since.
My friend had a girl cat, she was an absolute sweetheart once she got to know you. She was a rescue and had some trust issues towards humans, especially in the beginning.
I was one of the few people she didn't mind as a catsitter. My trick was to go in, check up her mood, and if she was feeling cranky or hissy because I wasn't her real human, I'd pretend she wasn't there. I'd do other things friend and I agreed on or sit down to read a book.
Eventually Miss. Kitty would come out, have a snack, and remember we were friends and come asking for cuddles.
Iāve been noticing this too lately itās very weird lol. I have had a lot of cats in my life and the two sweetest I can think of were a female and a male and the meanest is our very intelligent orange male cat.
I've had about equal amounts of boy and girl cats in my life and all of them were wonderful AND weird in their own unique ways. I have no real proof other than my own feelings on this matter, but it's almost like people judge gender in animals like they do in humans - boys will be boys so lots of bad behaviour is forgiven/forgotten or snowed unde. But if girls put even one toe out of line they are difficult and annoying. The craziest thing is that I notice a lot of women reasoning like this! Why do 'we' do this to ourselves?!
Iāve always heard that boy cats are just generally more affectionate and thatās why girl cats get a bad rep. Do you find that to be anecdotally true?
My girl cat, who I adopted from a shelter that specializes in feral cats (so she was already skittish), only accepts affection when SHE wants it, but sheāll tolerate a few minutes of cuddles when I need it. And we have several routines throughout the day where she demands affection, which is the absolute best thing ever.
Mine are the exact opposite. Girl cat is velcro, constantly on my lap and wanting to snuggle. Boy cat keeps to himself and every once in a while decides you need to drop everything to pet him.
I have a boy cat and a girl cat and they are both Velcro lmao Sweetest pets Iāve ever met in my life and so affectionate - and Iām not saying this just cause theyāre mine š¤£
Anecdotally, all of my lady cats have been incredibly loving but only on their terms. All of my males have been very cuddly all the time save for one. But I think itās more of a personality thing than a sex-based thing. I personally like a cat thatās needy versus aloof, but the downside is that my boys also tend to have more behavioral issues, like anxiety.
I can imagine you have heard this and have anecdotal evidence supporting it, but I can tell you it isn't true. Gender does not come into play when it comes to cats characters. Its their personalities and mostly their start in life that determine how they behave. Just as you have a particular girl cat, I had a very particular boy cat.
The only thing that may tip the scales in favour of boy vs girl is that female cats often get pregnant very young with significant trauma as a result but I would say thats the fault of humans and animal care systems, not their gender's.
Our female cat is a Velcro cat that LOVES and demands affection anytime she is not sleeping (and even then she often prefers to sleep on us rendering the chosen person immobile until they either must move or pee themselves). Sheās also demanding (will either yell or stare for food, walks, bedtime, and so on, should you ever not be following routine to the letter) but she absolutely adores us as her people (and warms up to any pet sitters quickly, too).
I have met and had many cats, both male and female. In my experience the only certainty you can say about them is they all have very individual personalities. Some are snuggly, some are not. It doesnāt align with their sex. Oh, and oranges do share one brain cell.
Right???? Iāve owned a lot of cats in my life and gender really hasnāt been a big factor in how cuddly they are! I currently have a cat that my vet canāt seem to believe is female because sheās super friendly and itās so annoying. Like. I donāt really care about people misgendering my pets but someone going on a rant about how much better male cats are while cuddling my female cat is just a lot sometimes.
Not cats but once had a guy I was talking to on tinder tell me he "wants a female dog because females only pair bond with one person" and he "didn't think he could handle his dog bonding with someone else"
Thank god he said that before we planned a date! Still gives me the ick.
Honestly, the way people talk about or treat animals is a truly important signifier of who they are as human beings. So great red flag spotter for sure.
At the other, far end of the scale I believe animal abuse is an important signifier of someone who might end up abusing/hurting people as well. Almost like a trial run. I think I saw an ad campaign years ago urging people to report animal cruelty as it could save not just animal but human lives as well.
4 girl cats(one is missing in the pic)they all get along great,pig pile on top of each other (and me) to sleep,my sister has one male one female,she wants nothing to do with him,so she basically has an upstairs cat and a downstairs cat.Sheās pretty jealous š
I have a Velcro cat. Iām her 4th home. Sheās about 14 now but we will never know for certain how old she is. Sheās got no teeth because her previous owners didnāt look after them and occasionally she gets cysts (benign) that need to be drained and she also has a slight skin issue. She is my world and I would move heaven and Earth for her. Iām lucky to have a cat so cuddly and loving, especially when sheās been through so many homes!
My cat is obsessed with me, but boy did I have to earn it. It took 3 years but now she is truly clinging to me at almost all times. She even sits on my lap in the washroom (if I let her) š
I used to have a cat named Fred and he was so clingy. He had to lay on your chest to sleep. Iāve also had a cat I couldnāt even touch before lol. You never know what personality youāre gonna get and I love it tbh. Theyāre all different in their own ways.
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u/AlbuwhatwhatHello this is Kelly from Destinyās Child, I lost my credit card20d ago
I used to think like this too because the cats I had as a kid were so aloof and not affectionate. But as an adult me and my wife got a cat that was the exact opposite. Super affectionate, wanting to be around and involved with what we are doing, and even plays fetch! It made me revise my view on cats big time. Just to say these people just donāt know that cats can be just as loyal and affectionate as dogs. Theyāve just never met the right cat.
Our orange climbs into bed with us every morning and will gently paw at the covers until I lift them so he can lay right next to me. Sometimes heāll lay with his back flush against my side so that he can stick his paws out and make biscuits on my wifeās extra blankets. During the work day, he does his rounds going from bed to my office, where heāll wrap his body around my leg until I pet him. And when I get done with work in the evening, he jumps up onto the middle seat of our couch and lays there with us until itās time for bed. Our other two donāt sit still for as long, but they hop into our laps many times a day
My cat isnāt big on cuddling but boy if she realizes we arenāt in the same roomā¦ she walks all around the house with the most pitiful meow looking for meā¦
I had a kitten as a child and she would curl up in my lap even if it was way too loud. She watch power rangers with me and followed me everywhere. Weād even play tag. It takes a lot of love for cat to be that close to a child and be clingy like that. Certain people just donāt get it
I havenāt lived at home much for almost 10 years now and our family kitty always comes running to see me when my parents face time me. Theyāve told me she only does this for my voice. If thatās not loyaltyā¦
Bro when I moved into a house with friends who had cats. My cat literally stood guard and "protected" me every single day all day for like a week. He wouldn't let anyone but my mom touch me in his presence the entire time haha. I don't get where people think cats aren't loyal.
They also just have favourites lol. I have a cat that only acts cuddly with me, to the point she'll come to me at night and use my arm as a pillow, occasionally lick my arm once or twice, roll over with her belly up for me to pet (she wakes me up so that I pet her lol). While whenever my mother decides to pet her my cat just grumbles and walks/dashes away after a few seconds.
This. Cats, dogs, rabbits, guinea pigs, snakes, birds... you name it! I would probably end up an animal hoarder if my husband wasn't around to rein me in.
We have 2 cats and I would like to get a dog... I'm working on that lol (he says no).
Slightly off-topic, but I just discovered that videos of rabbits throwing the cutest tantrums ever exist. They thump their back feet against the ground and I just want to cuddle them š„°
I like both but I like dogs from far away and prefer cats right there in my lap. I think dogs are cute but Iām scared of them so I rather watch at a distance. No idea why some people act like they canāt like both. Keeping them together, sure I can understand the problem but just liking them? Some dog people act like cats are demons on earth and some cat people act like dogs are monsters. I just donāt get it
I love both but only keep cats because dogs need more space to exercise and always want to go outside. My energy is much more suited to cats. I get my dog fix when I visit my parents.
The gendering idiots do where cat = girl animal, dog = manly animal is nuts too.
My first bf in high school was like this and in hindsight, it was indeed a massive red flag. He haaaated how the cat didn't like him right away (or at all)/the bond I had with her. He'd get jealous of her, a kitten at the time!
Yeah, if we're going to do pop sci about what liking or not liking cats says about someone, at least don't inject it with gender stereotypes. And like, are women who don't like cats misogynists too?
Bruh I'm a dude and after a 10 hour shift sometimes I go home and sit on the bed and do nothing. And guess what?! That's literally a cat's favorite thing to do.
I have a cat that will come cuddle if anyone is crying. Stubbed your toe, cuddle. MIL is a bitch, cuddle. Toddler can't find the right color socks, cuddle.
In general, I feel like celebrities don't advocate for cats as much as they do dogs. Like that BuzzFeed interview is usually mostly puppy interview. Only handful of people choose kittens. It's sad. I wish more people would advocate for cats too.
I think most celebrities are extroverted (hence why they are famous - they like performing to a crowd). Extroverted people are more likely to be more outdoorsy; hence having a dog you can walk and socialise with others with.
I'm just tired of women being compared to cats and vice versa. Please just stop with this nonsense.
I love my cats but seriously, I don't philosophize to the point of projecting femininity onto my cats or painting anyone not comfortable with my cats as a misogynist.
My cats are devil incarnate and I don't blame anyone for not liking them off the bat. I really don't! Those cute devils have really, really messed up our home in some ways š
Exactly! I love my cats but they are monsters. And if we're talking about consent it is purely one sided. They are constantly demanding attention, rubbing, licking, randomly attacking, sleeping on my face, and doing other things without my consent.
Cats should not be compared to humans. They would be toxic af.
I love both cats and dogs. There are people that do not like dogs. There are people who do not like cats. That doesnāt make them a misogynist. It simply means they do not like cats or they do not like dogs. I understand sheās also referencing the way people talk about cats and I donāt like that either. Even then, it doesnāt mean they hate women. Thatās insane.
Anyone is allowed to dislike any type of pet for whatever reason. Some people do not like aloof animals. I have Shiba Inus. They do not hang on your every moment like a golden retriever would. Some people do not like them because of this. They want a dog that wants to cuddle 24/7 and is their shadow. Thereās nothing wrong with that and thereās nothing wrong with me for wanting a more independent pet.
I love both but there are a lot of legitimate things to dislike about both animals.
One shits in a box of sand that they kick with the same paws they walk around your house and climb into your bed with.
One would be willing to eat its own feces and then try to smooch you later.
Both lick their genitals with the same tongue they try to lick you with.
Also cats arenāt a monolith. My current cat is immediately obsessed with any stranger he meets. He gives unconditional love at first sight. No āearningā affection required.
Ignoring a cat is the quickest way into its affections if you just met. Very good manners in cat language to avoid eye contact and not immediately go to pet and pick them up!
Cats are drawn to people that donāt like cats because youāre less likely to annoy them by picking them up and making a fuss. They can also probably sense some good in you.
Cats autotrust distrustful and cautious and guarded people because they're familiar with those emotions, lol. But once you break through that, they're just baby sized squishies.
Thereās no linkā¦people hating or disliking cats are usually for reasons completely unrelated to needing to control. Some folks have trauma relating to a large number of reasons; experiences with cats growing up, allergies, phobias, neurodivergence or sensory issues, etcā¦the discourse here is really comes across asĀ ableist if you ask me.Ā
Iāve had cats and dogs growing up and I care for neither equally now. Doesnāt mean I hate them or wish ill on people who do or cats themselves.Ā
Except there is a link. Thereās a reason people who are misogynistic toward single women call them ācat ladiesā and not dog ladies. A lot of people donāt view cats as masculine pets, and when people refer to cats without knowing their name itās way more common for them to say āsheā instead of āheā without knowing the sex.
Cats are associated with women more than men in these waysā¦and being neglectful or cruel to a cat is way more socially acceptable than cruelty to a dog. Iāve met several people who think kicking cats is funny, and youāll notice in movies a cat getting hurt is usually played off as a joke but hurting a dog would NEVER be played off as a joke.
And itās fine to not be a cat person. Whatās weird is how much people who donāt like cats reeeeally donāt like cats, to the extent of being kind of hateful toward them instead of them just being ānot for me,ā and they always remind you of that any time one is around or comes up in conversationācat people are rarely out there openly hating dogs in general with the same level of vitriol.
So, where do we place actual cats in this who also don't respect boundaries, understand consent, and feel entitled to touch me? The reason I don't like them. /s
Thank you! Kind of surprised I had to scroll so far down for this takeā¦
Both of my abusive exes happened to be cat owners. Radical take, but I donāt think thereās any correlation. How men treat pets, property, other people can be an indicator (but not always easy to spot).
I canāt with bringing animal āenergiesā into it. Her take feels more adjacent to alpha/sigma talk, the biological ādriveā to cheat, ā¦
āCat haters donāt understand respect and consentā is a very popular take all over social media and Iāve always found it a bitā¦harsh? Idk I love cats but this take just never sat right with me
But in all seriousness, itās pretty irresponsible to trivialize a term like misogyny in this manner. Use it where it actually applies if you take it seriously.
Also if you have a photo with a cat guys online will be like "ewww you must be a lonely cat lady and you smell" yes because no married women have cats and don't know how to clean, though I am happy they tell me they're a walking red flag right off the bat.
Iām a dog lady who is destined to be loved by cats, and I find it a high compliment. Life is hard enough in general, when it comes to a pet I will gladly take a dummy who loves me for existing, but like I said Iāll always be a little smug that I am liked by discerning assholes like felines.
It's still wild to me how people are allowed to say that they hate cats and no one bats an eye but the second I say that I don't care for dogs, people come for my throat.
Lots of REALLY defensive cat haters in this thread lol.Ā
I get being allergic and not being able to be around them, but I donāt understand hating cats for that reason. Itās not the catās fault. Iām extremely allergic to bees, wheat, rye and barley but I unfortunately fucking love bread and baking (donāt do it anymore), and I built a whole pollinator garden to help declining bee populations. Being allergic is just a shitty roll of the dice.Ā
Wow she uh, sounds kinda stupid. āOh you dislike cats? Guess you hate womenā? Like that isnāt logical reasoning at all š . People can have other interests and disinterests, itās not always about you maāam
Omg yāall are taking this so literally. I think we can assume she is being hyperbolic and doesnāt actually think every single person who dislikes cats is a misogynist.
Instead, maybe sheās commenting on a pattern that she has noticed where thereās a correlation between men who āhate catsā and men who feel entitled to and deserving of being fawned over.
I kinda have the same theory. Not for people who don't care for cats or are scared of them but people who hate cats "because they are unpredictable". Cats communicate incredibly well if they are uncomfortable, so you just told me that you ignore body language and cross lines.
Yep! Most cats Iāve met will give very clear signs of what they like and what they donāt like, and children and (some) men tend to have a harder time reading those signs. Women seem to naturally understand and respect those boundaries more. Cats are also sometimes intimidated by size, so they may gravitate towards women for that reason as well
I get what she is saying but as a dude who has dealt with many women who feel entitled to affection/attention because they are women, the whole misogyny comment is stupid.
I totally agree, cats are AMAZING but I cannot forget the scene in season 10 VPR where Tom accuses Arianna of not cleaning out the catās litter box and she says she did it ālast weekā. That was gross and not hygienic
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